


ROCK BOTTOM: A No Good, Very Bad Weekend

by Katsimsam



Series: Fairytale Life. [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Daddy Kink, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Light Dom/sub, May/December Relationship, Not Canon Compliant, Older Man/Younger Woman, Sibling Bonding, Sibling Love, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-08-19 19:04:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 66,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20214745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katsimsam/pseuds/Katsimsam
Summary: It’s the first time she’s been back for the big, annual, Riverlands, ‘family’ weekend bash in a very long time. And she did NOT want to be there. Except that she did. Maybe she really, really did.NOTE: all other relationships are minor mentions barring only Jaime/Sansa.





	1. Chapter 1

THURSDAY.

Sansa pulled her car up slowly, letting it roll the last few feet into the empty patch of grass along the gravelled drive. Making sure to leave room for others to pull up, and giving clear space should anyone wish to get out. She wanted to go herself, but she had promised her mother she would be there. And when her reliable little car didn’t break down like she secretly hoped it would, her hand had been forced.

So there she was, sitting in her car, staring across the rolling lawns towards her once favourite place in the world. ‘Ruby Fort’ - a massive, sprawling country manor, three stories, multiple wings, separate pool house, boat shed and small dock, all set on acres of manicured lawns and gardens, hidden from the world and any neighbours in three directions, by thick bush land chock full of native wildlife and beautiful wildflower lined walking paths. Set right on the edge of the sweeping bend of The Green Fork River, just a few miles down stream from the Ruby Ford and the ancient Crossroads Inn.

Her Uncle Jon had built it to be his sanctuary when he retired. A place that he could not only unwind himself in his later years, but also - he would joke that it would encourage their families to visit him without having to twist their arms. He never actually got to live there permanently, because he never got to retire. It was the one place that her Aunt Lysa couldn’t get her money grabbing paws, which was why he spent the majority of his vast personal fortune on it. He was not a stupid man and that had proved true when she had tried to contest the Will after he died.

But ‘Ruby Fort’ was her Father’s now. Her Fathers and Robert Baratheons. The _sons _Uncle Jon never had. 

They had both lived with him whilst at school in The Vale, between the wife he loved and lost, and the harridan he took to wife because he was lonely. The estate was willed to her Father personally, because unlike Robert, he wasn’t his actual fathers heir. As the second son, he didn’t have an estate that would one day be his. So Uncle Jon gifted him one, on the proviso that the doors always be open to Robert and his family, and that they maintain the bond forged in his home all those years ago.

So started the tradition of annual joint family vacations. Of course the families all ventured there individually at times too, but once a year at least, her Father and Robert would join forces to drag all Starks and Baratheons together for a _family getaway. _

Over the years, it expanded out to include The Lannister brothers and the odd stray Tyrell or two. And even though Aunt Lyanna refused to be in the same state as Robert, Jon was always sent along with them. Plus Theon, because Robb suffered from separation anxiety from his now husband, even as a child.

It had been magical. Uncle Jon had been her favourite person when she was little. He was a proper gentleman and he doted on her. After he died, Ruby Fort and their big family weekends became important to her, because they had been important to her Uncle. And this was where she got to spend so much time with him whilst he was still alive.

Right up until she and Joffrey ruined everything.

That particular family getaway was set on the weekend of her seventeenth birthday and she had been so excited to spend it there with everyone. Especially Joffrey. 

It was how it was supposed to be. They would date and fall in love and get married and forever tie their families together. Except that he had gotten drunk, punched her little sisters friend, and then turned on Arya when she screamed at him over it. He turned abusive after that, but she held her tongue because she wanted the perfect dream she had created in her mind and she believed he would stop eventually. 

Finding him having sex with another girl at a party was the last straw. Or at least it would have been had he not beaten her bloody for telling him it was over. The actual final straw was Jon, Robb and Theon beating him unconscious on the driveway of Roberts Kings Landing mansion when Arya called them raging over the injuries he had inflicted upon her.

The families came back together two years after Joffrey died. All of them except her and Cersei. Cersei, who blamed her for Joffrey dying of anaphylaxis during their high school graduation dinner. How she was responsible for his eating shellfish and not having an epipen on hand she would never know. But the psychotic break the woman suffered after her sons _accidental _death probably explained it.

This was to be the first time they were both there since. She hadn’t wanted to risk being haunted by the memories of what was and what could have been. And she didn’t want to risk seeing the crazy woman who’s son was apparently completely innocent of any wrong doing. 

Sansa knew she ignored the boys, hating them for bashing her precious son, even going so far as refusing to attend Robb and Theons wedding the year before. But she knew from Myrcella, that whilst she disliked them, she hated Sansa with an almost obsessive passion.

The tap on her window startled her out of her reminiscence and her anxious procrastination. It also frightened the life out of her and caused her to slam her head on the roof. She whimpered slightly and held it as she rolled down the window and took in the curiously contrite looking Jaime Lannister.

She hadn’t seen him since the wedding, where she hadn’t even spoken to him! Why on the Gods green earth he was tapping on her window and scaring the hells out of her she wouldn’t know!

“Sorry. You alright?” He asked.

Sansa blinked rapidly and cleared her throat before nodding. Still very confused. Sure, he didn’t hate her like his sister did, but unlike the rest of the family, he hadn’t spoken up for her against his sisters vitriol either. And whilst they were polite to each other, they weren’t exactly friendly, like she was with Tyrion. 

“I’m fine. You startled me is all. Did you want something?” She flushed awfully, She was so flustered that she didn’t know how to be polite apparently. And apparently, he found it amusing. 

“Just wanted to make sure you hadn’t hosed the exhaust, so you didn’t have to come in and deal with...” She frowned in confusion as he waved towards the house, and then back at him in question making him laugh again. “I’m kidding Sansa. I saw you pull up and then just sit here. Thought you might need a _Knight in Shining Armour_ to escort you in. Don’t worry, the dragon is well stocked on Valium and currently sleeping, because apparently sitting on her ass in a exceedingly expensive car for a few hours is exhausting.” Again she blinked at him in confusion and then sagged as his teasing breached the fog of her mind, smiling sheepishly up at him. 

“Am I that obvious?” 

He shot her that thousand watt smile that somehow made him look exactly like an arrogant lion and nodded.

“Come on Lady Sansa. Pop the trunk and I’ll even carry your bags for you.” 

Her own smile widened as he bowed dramatically and sauntered around her car to knock on the back. He was acting rather strangely in her opinion. But he was also making her feel a lot less terrified too. So she wouldn’t object at all to his kindness. It would be rude if she did anyway. 

She hit the button and climbed out herself, stretching her back and limbs as she did. She had only driven from The Eyrie, which wasn’t nearly as far as all others would have had to travel, but she was a bit stiff anyway. Likely from the anxious tension. 

“Is this it? I always figured you for a ‘thousand suitcases for a three day weekend, just in case’ type of girl.” He joked. 

She huffed a small laugh and shook her head in embarrassment. 

“Once upon a time I was. Now I’m just a more efficient packer. I can fit far more in that one bag than one might think _Ser.” _She grinned cheekily at him. 

“I’ll take your word for it Mary Poppins.”

“Funny. Actually the truth is that I was more concerned with conspiring with my fellow She Wolves over covering for me so I could hide in my Tower for the most part.” Jaime paused mid step and looked at her in utter bafflement. Amusing her no end. 

“That requires elaboration.” He stated.

She winced and flushed heavily. She really shouldn’t be joking around with Jaime Lannister like she would her siblings, or one of the other uncles even. She didn’t know Jaime well at all, yet she was completely at ease beside him as they strolled down the drive.

“Well I had this grand plan, where my car would break down, providing me with an excuse that my mother couldn’t possibly shoot down and guilt trip me over. A reason to call my sister and save she and Gendry from what promises to be an incredibly awkward weekend, because I’d need him to come fix my car! It was perfect! Except that even my car is too well behaved to step out of line on Catelyn Stark!” She smiled at his bark of laughter and rolled her eyes at herself. “Failing that, I bribed Arya and Ygritte into being the responsible, helpful Stark daughters, so I might hide away more. Hence the light packing. Partly I was distracted with my master plans and partly, I realised that I wouldn’t require elaborate outfits because I will be using my siblings as human shields, none of whom would notice I wasn’t perfectly coiffed unless I appeared in my underwear and nothing else. And when I’m hiding it hardly matters what I wear!”

She had no idea what part of her diatribe had caused it, but the poor man looked like he was choking, he was laughing and coughing so much. 

She rested a hand on his shoulder where he was bent over out of concern and cocked her head in question, which apparently only made it funnier. And more confusing for her. 

“You know? I think this is the longest conversation I’ve ever had with you Lady Sansa. I was of a mind that you were a quiet, well mannered and _very_ proper little lady. Hence the nick name? I feel almost insulted by the fact that I didn’t know you were funny.” 

She sniffed primly at him, his almost insulting words bringing her back down rather quickly. For a moment she had almost forgotten who she was talking to. She held her tongue and continued walking. The awkwardness causing her anxiety to crash over her again in rushing waves.

“So this magical hideaway Tower Of yours? Do you entertain guests in there?” 

Sansa frowned slightly in confusion at his almost contrite tone and shook her head. 

“It wouldn’t be a very good hideaway if people knew where it was.” She answered quietly.

Jaime Lannister hummed in thought beside her. 

“And if another was attempting to hide also? Or could you perhaps recommend a different hiding place for another antisocial being who would prefer to be anywhere but here this weekend?” His conversational tone didn’t fool her. He knew he had made her uncomfortable and he was trying to undo the damage, but he was also attempting to make her feel better by claiming his own discomfort at being there. 

“I know why I don’t want to be here, but what’s your excuse? Surely you wouldn’t allow yourself to be pressured into coming?” He smirked at her in very clear amusement and rested his hand on the door handle for a moment. 

“I’ll see you a wonderful and caring mother and raise you a demanding, overbearing and frankly terrifying father. _Your_ _dragon_ deemed it necessary to invite _The Great Lion_ himself along to make _everyone _as uncomfortable as she shrieked that she was going to be.” 

Sansa slammed her hand over his to stop him from turning the handle and stared at him in shock. 

“Mr. Lannister is here?” 

He hummed in affirmation and squeezed her hand. 

“Don’t look so panicked Red. His presence is actually a good thing for you. Tyrion said he only agreed so that she didn’t lash out like the crazy person she is.” He offered in an almost consoling tone.

Sansa didn’t have a chance to question his out of character words against his sister - whom he had always been completely, blindly loyal to. 

Nor did she have opportunity to query his gifting her a nickname. _Why_ he had called her _Red_ was ridiculously obvious. But she had always been Lady Sansa, because that was what her Uncle Jon had dubbed her when she was three and it had stuck. Besides, Jaime Lannister had never called her anything really, her name in passing was about it. Because they never really interacted. 

Cersei had dubbed her _Little Dove, _but nobody else was insulting enough towards her to do so as well. Not even Jaime, when they were an inseparable duo, which apparently they weren’t to such an extreme degree anymore. He had smiled almost understandingly at her and pushed the door open. 

“Starks! Your Lady is here.” 

If she wasn’t the well behaved person she was, she would have groaned at his obnoxious yelling and slapped his shoulder for it. But there was nothing to be done as the wolves descended, seemingly from everywhere, to greet her with happy laughs and warm hugs and curious looks at the man who stepped away and popped her bag down at the bottom of the stairs to their family wing with a wink to her before he walked away.

She didn’t really have the chance to think on the strange interlude much at all, nor did it really matter as she let herself get distracted with greeting her wild and wonderful family. She hadn’t seen any of them in person, in months. Which was her mother’s reasoning for demanding her presence. The downside to growing up, was that life could sometimes get in the way of the important things. And for as much as she hadn’t wanted to be there, and for how nervous she still was at the potentially disastrous weekend ahead? In that moment she was genuinely happy to be _Home_.


	2. Chapter 2

THURSDAY NIGHT.

He was full of shit. And maybe just a little bit ridiculous and pathetic. The only reason he had even started attending these ridiculous Baratheon/Stark ‘family long weekends’ was because his sister had begged him to keep her company, lest she go mad. She hadn’t found it as amusing as he did when he dragged Tyrion along with him so he wasn’t alone with the wolves and stags and forced to see Cersei drunkenly falling into bed with an equally drunk Robert, after he spent the whole evening pawing at her. Later years he went because Myrcella would beg he and Tyrion with those big green eyes and adorable little pout, and he never could deny her a thing. She and Tom were the only people in the whole world, who loved him unconditionally, for exactly who he was. Of course they didn’t actually KNOW exactly who he was until they were old enough to almost understand why no one could ever know, and old enough to not hate him for something he had never been sure of. Not that he actually WAS that anyway. Not that he ever could be in truth and they knew it as well as he did. Which was why no one else but them and his siblings knew. They found out accidentally, thanks to the allergy testing he had taken them for when Joff died. Cersei had been hospitalised to deal with her break down and Robert had fallen into his scotch bottle and not come out. So it was on he and Tyrion to help them grieve, because Stannis was stuck helping Ned sort Robert out and Renly is barely capable of looking after himself without help, let alone two heart broken teenagers. Whilst his father had to deal with Cersei. The testing had been his brothers idea, so they could be confident that they had nothing to fear about how their brother died. The uncomfortable side effect was learning that their blood type was HIS blood type, not their fathers, when it should have been. He didn’t actually understand it really, Tyrion had worked it out. All he knew was that for some reason, Roberts blood type would have won out over his sisters, if they were his. And that coupled with the fact that he and his sister had been together since their childhood sealed it as fact. Without knowing THAT, all it was proof of, was that they weren’t Roberts.

The weekends stopped after Joff carried on like an idiot the year he died. The rift between the families had been a gaping hole long before he died. A gaping hole that was entirely Joffs fault. The abusive little shit had been getting more and more MEAN with the eldest Stark girl who had ALWAYS been light years out of his league, and in his mind, that weekend should have been the last straw for the girl. But she forgave it the silly chit. And his being mean, turned into his actually taking hands to her and the wolves stepped in. He had enjoyed seeing it. Jon Targaryen, That unassuming, awkwardly quiet kid... Who knew he had that sort of rage in him? Or that natural talent for physical combat. Robb and Theon both got a kick or two in before Robert pulled them off, but Jon was the one that really did the damage. He had set him up with an interview with the recruitment officer of his own special forces division the very next day. Yet another secret he kept close to his chest. Only he and Jon knew that it was him who set him up with the military career that he had dreamed of. That was their deal when he had called him to let him know he had done it. Jon had to claimed he applied himself when he realised continued academics weren’t his future. And that was the end of it.

Yet despite his horrid nephews best efforts to screw things up, and ultimately his death? Robert and Ned Stark worked through their anger over the way things had broken, mainly because it was only Ned who had a chance of maybe getting the idiot semi sober again. And the weekends were back, minus Cersei and little Lady Sansa. And he was still wrangled into going two out of three years because of Myrcella and his inability to tell her no and stick to it! The only time he got away with it had been the year before, when he hurt his hand. He hadn’t planned on being here this time either. Myrcella knew not to ask when she realised that her father had decided that it would be good for her mother to get back to ‘normal’ finally and make the effort with The Starks. Their relationship never recovered from him not blaming everyone else but Joffrey for the fall out. It only got worse when he died and she went on her mad tangent about Sansa murdering him. He had tried when she come home from the hospital, the very first time, to work things out, be there for her, help her grieve properly and heal. And provided The Starks didn’t come up, things were almost companionable between them. But it wasn’t the same. And it only seemed to deteriorate further the second and third time she came home - the times that no one but them actually knew about. Then they were blown away completely, like a keg of wildfire exploding when he was injured. Somehow an accident whilst inspecting his newest recruits weapons, forcing him into an early promotion to glorified desk jockey instead of active training officer and field commander thanks to the medical discharge from field service; meant he wasn’t capable of protecting her from her enemies anymore. Never mind that SHE was her worst enemy.

THAT was something he hadn’t lied to Sansa about. His sister was batshit crazy. She even had a fancy certificate for it now. Which he supposed he really shouldn’t actually judge her for, her mental instability wasn’t her fault, it simply was. But he had lied about his being unable to get out of being there this time around. Not even his father had attempted to force his hand. Tywin Lannister knew well enough that his sons could not be around his daughter too long unless he was forcing her to take her medication. No one could really be around her for any real length of time if she wasn’t medicated. The true reason he was there was slightly embarrassing and frankly insane. But the reality was, that he had decided he would be there, when Myrcella had confided in he and Tyrion, that she was concerned about Sansa being there as well. It was the first he’d heard that she would be back. Poor Myrcella had been conflicted about it. Wanting to be excited for all of their families sakes, and for her own, that she would get to see her friend for more than a quick coffee date catch up when they happened to be in the same vicinity as each other or long distance calls and text conversations. But understanding just how poorly it could go if her mother snapped. She had similar feelings about Gendry being there at the same time as her mother too, but to a far lesser degree. They all knew she would just pretend the boy wasn’t her husbands son, just as said son pretended he wasn’t. The Starks weren’t actually aware of her true state either. And Robert was in denial about it, believing that she was merely being a bitch when they come up in conversation and that she’d play nice and ultimately get over her carry on if forced to attend the family long weekend again.

The less ridiculous part of why he was there, was to be available to Myrcella and Tommen, if it became more than merely awkward. The other part of it was that he wanted to see Sansa. Actually get to know the glorious creature who that soft little lady had turned into. Seeing her at her brothers wedding, after so many years of not really even remembering she existed, but to avoid her name when forced to be around his sister, had been akin to being smacked in the face. She was NOT the same girl he had pitied and thought to be kind of dull and uninteresting in truth. And he had been forced to acknowledge that maybe, just maybe, it was his own arrogance that prevented him noticing the quiet and well behaved Stark child. She HAD always been a good friend to Myrcella, and almost like a caring older cousin for Tommen, and she and Tyrion seemed to get along well too. But she had always just been, pretty and nice and well behaved and not terribly memorable. But at the wedding she was... Somehow he had missed her growing up and becoming the single most beautiful woman on the planet. With an intoxicating laugh and a smile that could light the whole damned room up.

According to Tyrion, who had shared more than one drink with the siren born of his dreams, she had recently broken things off with the latest douchebag to be unworthy of her. After finding him in bed with another woman too, which he learned from Arya because Sansa being the perfectly poised Lady she was had merely said that it wasn’t meant to be. He learned later that they had actually been engaged, not long enough to have celebrated it or started planning an actual wedding, likely because she was actually still studying at the time, but that was hardly the point either. She had come home one day to find the man she thought to marry, fucking a high school girl in her bed. Learning that had only increased his own fascination. Because only those aware of the actual details would have been able to tell that she had had her heart broken mere weeks beforehand. She was radiant and as poised as ever. Every inch her mother’s daughter, constantly moving and overseeing things, talking to everyone and smiling brightly, all whilst laughing and having a good, relaxed, FUN time with her siblings. She seemed so happy. And it made him wonder just how strong, how determined and stubborn a person has to be to be able to hide heartbreak so well.

So there he was, the pathetic old creep who had gone ahead and developed a crush on a girl he had known as a small child, who had been abused by his own nephew. Who he may or may not have searched out on social media following the wedding and almost stalked like a creep. He had barely actually held a conversation with the girl and yet he had seemingly gone ahead and fallen in love with everything new he learned about her. Never mind that absolutely NOTHING could actually happen with them, even if she was interested. He might be a reckless bastard, but he had learned his lesson the hard way. If it felt like a dirty secret that no one would accept? There was probably a pretty good reason for it. Though at least she wasn’t his twin sister. Even if some of the things he found himself drawn to, were similarities between the two, they were very different and yet neither was at all appropriate.

Not that he had been able to convince himself of what was and wasn’t actually appropriate earlier! He felt like a stalker! Going for a walk around the grounds slowly after overhearing Catelyn tell Ned that she would likely arrive within the hour if traffic was good through the mountains. He had MEANT to ‘run into her’ when she pulled up and actually talk to her. He hadn’t meant to scare the shit out of her by tapping on the window and shaking her out of her small freak out. He certainly hadn’t meant to offend her by joking about not ever knowing she could be funny. And then he had called her Red out loud... Something he was NOT proud to admit he had called her in his head at times. He was a fucking creep. He supposed he could be grateful she would never know just how many of his fantasies she featured in now. All the same, he had bailed out like a scalded cat when her family popped out like cockroaches out of the cracks when he called out to say she was there. Of course his finely honed arrogant swagger had kicked in and saved him looking like some green boy running away! But that IS what he had done and he wasn’t proud of it. And then he followed through on his word and actually hid until he was called down for dinner.

Thursday night was always a big fancy home cooked feast that Catelyn took great pride in organising and cooking herself. It never mattered how many of them were there, whether they all arrived on the Thursday or not, whether they brought extras along with them or not. It made no matter. She ALWAYS arrived ahead of everyone else, heading down early to stock the cupboards and air the whole house out, even though her uncle lived in the pool house unless on deployment, and acted as caretaker. There could be thirty people or more and they would still be fed like it was their last meal before execution. The massive formal dining table would be set to her exacting standards of perfection and the side tables laden with platters of whatever foods didn’t fit down the centre comfortably so as not to crowd her guests. He made the mistake of assuming she hired a full kitchen crew for it only the once. Though he knew she had taken it as a compliment to her skills too. She had a crew alright. The ones she birthed. Though it was usually only Sansa who was actually trusted to oversee any cooking in her stead. Until recent years at least, though he suspected it was still very much that way when Sansa was around. She had implied it herself when she said that she would make her sister and Jon’s girlfriend cover for her.

Even if he had been tempted to avoid showing his face in the dining room, he couldn’t because it would be the very first potential ‘showdown’, that he had determined he should be available to restrain his sister if necessary, for one thing, and for the other, he knew better than to insult Catelyn by avoiding her table. Plus her food was the absolute best part about this whole damned thing. He didn’t LIKE her or her husband, it always felt like they were judging him. But the further he got from the arrogant and cocky prick he had always been around them, because he honestly believed that he and Cersei were the only ones that mattered? The more he had come to respect them and actually behave like the gentleman his father had raised him to be around them. Quite simply? He had changed. Not enough for them to actually like him anymore than it made him LIKE them. But at least now there was more of an understanding.

“Mrs Stark, this is quite the feast you’ve organised. Very impressive. Might I ask who catered it? Do you employ staff on a semi permanent basis or did you outsource to a company for tonight?” Jaime bit down on his bark of laughter. His father had almost used the exact wording he had all those years ago. Of course he had almost sounded antagonising when he said it, even if he actually did mean it. His Father hadn’t afflicted any tone at all. He always meant his words. He was impressed. “Thank you Mr. Lannister. That’s kind of you to say. Traditions are important. I do the cooking myself on our first night every year.” Tyrion didn’t bother holding in his amusement at their fathers shock, chuckling happily into his wine glass. “You mean to say that you prepared all of this on your own?” Arya cackled happily and gave her sister a sly look that couldn’t mean anything good at all. “Our theory is that she can’t possibly be a real person Mr. Lannister. She’s good at everything! ESPECIALLY cooking! But this years Thursday feast is extra special, because she had her favourite assistant back! Ygritte and I just aren’t cut out to keep up with her I’m afraid.” Jaime sighed internally, of course that little heathen would go ahead and drop the glove so the first swings could be made. A point his Father would now inadvertently offer her an assist, purely by being polite. “I assure you, as I have assured my children many times over the years, I am a real person. Thank you Arya. The answer to your question is no, I don’t do it alone necessarily, my children help, because it was always my fondest hope that they would one day be able to cook themselves also. I’m still working on a few of them.”

“It’s alright Mama! The rest of us will just beg Sannie to do it for us when you come to visit and survive on microwave meals for the everyday eating!” His Fathers pointed look was actually enough to keep his sister silent, though she sneered in open hatred as the beautiful girl frowned at her idiot of a brother in silent reprimand. It was awkward. And he didn’t like it at all. His sister was the problem and it shouldn’t have to be uncomfortable. That and he had the perfect solution to the weird limbo they had fallen into. “I am certain I paid good money for some fancy cooking class that you wanted to take as a wedding gift Stark! Surely you learned more than how to turn on a microwave.” He grinned wickedly and tipped his glass to the fool as he laughed uproariously. “I was banking on you keeping your mouth shut about that Lannister! YES! I can cook! But it’s still a much safer option to ask Sansa if I mean to actually impress my mother!” Arya laughed so hard she almost choked. “Could you be more of a cliche big brother? Did he make you go with him Theon?”  
The man laughed happily at her cheek and shot his husband a sly grin. “Course I went with him! It was fun too! Robb learned to cook some awesome food and I learned I burn water like a champ! So now he does ALL the cooking.”

It took no time at all after that, for the tension to drop away, as everyone started discussing the merits of actually learning to cook properly. He almost hadn’t believed it to be that easy. Of course there were still uncomfortable moments and the obvious elephant in the room. But with the rest of the Baratheons having yet to arrive, and both Gendry and Sansa well away from his sister, his father and niece and nephew managed to keep her occupied enough with conversation to keep it from being the train wreck he had worried it might be. Though he didn’t doubt his father had threatened her with time in the private hospital should she carry on. Everyone knew why he was really there. But it worked. And once the meal itself was over, and they all headed away to the gaming room and out of Catelyns hair, Cersei retired as quickly as she could. Making everyone breathe just that little bit easier, but for Robert who had frowned in frustration, but held his tongue. The poor stupid fool didn’t want to accept that his wife and usual partner in excessive debauchery just was not coming back.

———————

“So how were finals sweetheart?”  
“They were fine actually. I don’t know what I was so worried about.”  
“Nor does anyone else dear! And your final showcase? You are ready? You said you had handed your concepts in?”  
“Yes. It’s a little daunting that they don’t give criticism beforehand like in the previous years shows. But I’m happy with my work so, hopefully they are too. I do have one piece that has been more difficult than I planned, a single line just isn’t sitting right and I’ve tried everything I can think of short of switching out my models and scrapping it completely! It’s driving me insane!”  
“Do you have photos?”  
“Of course - will you take a look for me?”  
“Of course. We will take a look tomorrow. Now tell me, how are you really? I know you didn’t want to come.”  
“Thank you. I did think I could bring it, but I decided against it. I don’t want to actually ‘work’ as such this weekend.... And I’m okay. Maybe just... Don’t object too much if I hide away a little?”  
“If you had said I’d have made sure we had everything we needed upstairs, so we could finish it.... Although? Without the model we still wouldn’t know if it was falling correctly anyway.”  
“Which is why I left it. I’ve been working on my graduation gown too. I’m really excited about it.”  
“That’s wonderful Sansa. Have you heard anything from any of the agencies you applied to?”  
“Not yet no. But it’s alright if none pick up for next year, I’ve worked it out so I can do some travelling instead. I’ll wait to hear obviously. But there’s no real rush.”  
“Travelling?”  
“Mmhmm. Only if nothing comes of my applications of course. But I don’t know if I told you that Arya sent me an album of the different fashions when she was abroad? It was really sweet of her and it gave me a lot of inspiration too.”  
“Did she? The cheeky girl never said! Well? Whatever you want darling, so long as you let us know and ask for help if you need it. And if you do travel? Think about taking a companion.... IS there any companion around?”  
“Gods no! No thank you. The last thing I need is to think I’ve found something worth having and walk in on yet another boyfriend naked with another girl again thank you very much.”  
“I want to be able to tell you that it won’t happen again. Unfortunately that isn’t exactly something you can predict.... But Sansa.-“  
“Please don’t Mama. I am genuinely not interested right now. I have had that particular dream smashed enough and... Gods! This awkward weekend is proof that it has lingered and continued to effect my life... Even at school and work and stuff! I am still living in the same city doing the same things I did with Harry, except that I go home ALONE now. I’m not ready to do this all over again, I don’t want to add to THAT! I’ve got Lady and she’s enough.”  
“Alright! Just listen for two seconds and then you can tell me why you didn’t bring Lady with you alright?”  
“Go ahead.”  
“Sweetheart, you are and always have been an old soul. For you? It’s always been about finding that one person and settling down. You had no interest in the build up or the games. And you’ve never been about floundering around from one person to the next until you find the one that fits you. You have that clear image in your mind of what you want and I think that maybe you settled for boys who you thought maybe could GROW into the man you truly want. When you should have been looking at the men already there.... Maybe not when you were younger of course? But now that you are an adult yourself? Look for someone who wants the same things you do to begin with. Not ones who maybe might want those things at some point. AND think about how someone might make YOU feel, not how it will be perceived by others. As long as they cherish you and treat you as you deserve?”  
“That’s... I don’t... Are you saying you think I like... When you say MAN you mean? You know what? I am leaving THAT conversation alone thank you. My head is enough of a mess right now. AS FOR LADY? She reacted poorly to a change in her diet. I didn’t really want her being sick in the car, so she’s with Mr. Royce for the weekend.”

Jaime walked away after that. He shouldn’t have stayed on the porch where he could hear it anyway! Let alone once he realised who he was hearing talking and where the conversation veered. But he couldn’t help himself. He found her soft voice very soothing. He also found Catelyns views on her dating issues to be eerily accurate from what he had deduced. That didn’t make it his business and it certainly didn’t give him any sort of green light for anything. It didn’t stop him thinking on it though, but he had always known he was an asshole. They certainly didn’t need to be reminded of his assholery though, so he stepped out into the well lit paths from a far enough distance for it to look like he was coming from a different angle and followed through to his original intended destination, the whisky bottle tucked securely in the crook of his right arm and the glass in the left, so his weak hand didn’t fail him where he knew they could see. And then he lowered himself into the lounger on the dock with lazy grace. He wouldn’t sleep well with Cersei anywhere near him anyway. Not if she knew where to find him anyway. And he hadn’t really thought on how the presence of the girl he almost felt like he was stalking like a scumbag, would effect his ability to shut off either. A bottle of whiskey and the night sky was a far safer bet for him that fearing waking to find the woman he once loved slipping into his bed. Or find himself wishing another would. He was an asshole and he should NOT have let his baser self decide that it was a good idea to be here.


	3. Chapter 3

FRIDAY:

Jaime started awake the next morning, thoroughly confused, aching, blinded but the morning light burning behind his stinging eyes. He groaned pathetically as he stretched and then froze at the sound of a soft laugh. He cracked his eyes open slowly, squinting desperately to keep the burning sensation at bay. And praying to all the seven that he was hearing things and he wasn’t currently waking up on the fucking dock after drinking until he passed out; with Sansa Stark standing over him. “Good morning. I’m sorry I woke you.” Dammit. He coughed and cleared his throat and then attempted to scrub at his face only to get tangled in something. And then he stared down at his chest in disbelief as he registered the knitted throw rug laying over him. Sansa Stark had covered his pathetic, drunken ass with a blanket because he was sleeping where he had been sitting the night before. 

Jaime hadn’t ever really had to deal with this level of embarrassment. And normally if he was placed in a spot that he found uncomfortable he would be an arrogant prick, chasing the offender off with scathing sarcasm or something equally as off putting so they would leave him in peace. But he wasn’t about to chase Sansa off if he didn’t have to. So her shot her a cocky grin and shuffled to sit better, wincing at the sharp pain in his hand from putting too much of his weight on it before he had thought to massage blood flow into it a bit. “What time is it?” He shoved his legs aside and waved her to side on the end of the lounger without really thinking about it, pulling the blanket up around his shoulders. Gods wasn’t he grateful for that! It was freezing. “It’s just on six. Dad and I are the only ones up. Coffee?” She couldn’t actually be a real person could she? She was utterly adorable in her fluffy slippers, wrapped up in a similar wool knit blanket with the steaming mug of morning happiness cupped in her delicate looking hands, a second sitting beside his near empty whiskey bottle next to him.

He groaned in embarrassment and flexed his hand, harshly rubbing feeling back into it so he didn’t drop the cup of coffee all over himself once he reached for it. “Well? That certainly explains why I am asleep here like some vagrant when I could be in a warm bed somewhere. Thank you for the coffee and the blanket and for waking me before anyone who might take great delight in paying me out for it might see me.” He grinned as she blushed beautifully and shook her head, making the messy knot of shiny hair sway. He had never actually seen her so unkempt! She was shockingly beautiful like this. Even more so than when she was perfectly composed. “You’re welcome. Though I’m not sure my Dad won’t laugh at you for it. So because I’m a nice person? I’ll give you the heads up? He also fell asleep out here drinking, when we were here last spring. Except that it was late afternoon and he hadn’t bothered with any sunblock.” He laughed quietly in disbelief and lifted the coffee cup to his lips, groaning almost sexually at the warmth and the smell hitting his nose. “You know Red? I’m not actually sure I didn’t freeze to death in the night and find myself in some alternate heaven like place. You are like a magical little wood nymph or something. Making sure I don’t suffer an existential crisis because I drunkenly passed out on the dock.”

The startled laugh she let out made him smile. She had a pretty laugh. “I think you might still be drunk Jaime.” He hummed and tilted his head to study her seriously as she sipped at her own cup. He liked this. A lot. Too much! He wanted to share coffee with her and laugh in the mornings, wrapped in warm blankets and soft looks. He was pathetic. “Possibly. I really hope not though because if I’m not hungover yet, than what’s coming is going to be brutal. I’m afraid to move and discover what creaks more, my aching body of the wooden dock that always does.” He smiled ruefully and rolled his eyes as she laughed softly again. Curious that he could tease her into relaxing a bit. He honestly thought she would avoid him as much as his sister. The best he had been hoping for was for polite indifference and maybe the one off smile if he was lucky enough to engage with her with Myrcella around.

“Your Hand is bothering you?” He blinked at her slowly and then flexed his hand again out of habit before grinning ruefully. “Only a lot more than usual.” He winked at her playfully and pushed the useless limb against the hot coffee cup to warm it again. “It’s fine.” She smiled sheepishly and nodded, shuffling until her long legs were tucked up before her, and rested her forearms on top of her knees to cradle the cup out ahead of her. “Can I ask what happened? Or is it too early or maybe to sore a subject? Myrcella only said you had an accident at work? And that you had to take a desk job because of it?” He blinked in surprise and sipped at the hot brew again as he studied the curious pink tones of her cheeks. “That’s about the sum of it... I WAS a senior training officer for my division, on top of my commanding a field crew. Basically, besides heading my own force, I was responsible for training the first year recruits in weapons basics. We had just gone through our first round of rifle assembly assessments - which is a timed full disassembly, full check, adjustments, cleaning, reassembly and load. The premise is that your weapon needs to be in the best possible condition at all times, and you also need to be able to pull down and deal with any unexpected faults anywhere basically. First we work on getting it right and then on getting it right under pressure and then as fast as possible. One of the recruits had accidentally loaded with a faulty ammunition cartridge and I fired it not realising it, everything checked out fine - until I pulled the trigger. I actually couldn’t even tell you exactly what went wrong but it was almost like one round actually connected with another already in the chamber and blew the side out of the thing. My hand and wrist took the blow. Shrapnel straight through my gloves.”  
He turned his hand to show her the litter of small scars along his wrist and the long one running down the inside of his palm. 

“Broken bones, torn and ruptured soft tissue and irreparable nerve damage. I can’t even pick up a rifle with that hand alone now. Can’t shoot a hand gun. My trigger finger won’t cooperate with what my mind tells it to do, and I can’t maintain a necessary grip. So? Given my rank and service record, they didn’t really want to push me into a full medical discharge, and retirement. The next natural step was into the Lord Commanders seat and being that Selmy was ready for retirement? He held off an extra twelve months to allow for my recovery. Had to learn to shoot left handed so I could actually pass the basic training course again though? That was humiliating. I hadn’t even looked at that particular course since I was around your age.” He frowned slightly and then near jumped out of his skin as her soft fingers traced over the angry mark gently. “I’m sorry.” He frowned harder and cocked his head in confusion. “Why are you sorry?” Her hand flew away from his and wrapped around her mug again so fast he almost missed it happening and then her face almost light up it burned so brightly. “I... it’s just that obviously you were forced to give up something you weren’t truly ready to, something you loved and no matter the circumstances surrounding it, accidental or not, it was someone else’s incompetence or inexperience that caused it. And whilst it could have been worse, it also shouldn’t have happened. I’m sorry that that happened to you.” Jaime froze and simply stared at her in shock. She wasn’t pitying him, or humouring him by acting sympathetic. She genuinely cared. Myrcella had been the only one to truly offer that same sort of understanding. Even his brothers in arms didn’t fully understand how it had broken something inside of him and they shared that same drive. He cleared his throat awkwardly and nodded in thanks. Not really sure what to say.

“I should get in there and help Dad get a start on breakfast. If he makes a mess in the kitchen my mother might drown him in the river.” He huffed a laugh at the idea of Catelyn Stark actually harming anyone in anyway. Though he supposed she did have a temper, just because she was kind and ladylike didn’t make her any less lethal if the situation called for it. “I think he’s pretty safe. She loves him too much to kill him. She might scold him very politely though.” And then she SNORTED! Making him laugh quite a bit! Who knew Sansa Stark could snort? It was decidedly unladylike and utterly adorable. “She might scold anyone else here whom does not sport the name STARK or Targaryen, very politely - but there isn’t a single chance we would get away that unscathed! She is a Tully and a redhead and her kitchen is sacred ground Ser!” He laughed heartily and nodded pointedly at her own glowing fire of messy curls. “What’s that say about you huh? Tully temper, Stark wolfs blood, red hair? Are you a scaring little woman too Red?” He could have kicked himself when she squeaked slightly and then flushed heavily, blinking slowly at him with those gorgeous big eyes. He hadn’t actually meant that to come out quite so... FLIRTY. But shit! It was out there and he couldn’t bring it back so he smirked at her with far more cocky arrogance than he felt and almost sighed with relief when those sea blue orbs narrowed at him. “You’d do well to remember that whilst I am a Lady, MY Lady is a wolf.” He let his smile widen slowly. More than a little pleased by her teasing him back. “And wolves have teeth and claws too huh?”  
“As long and sharp as yours My Lord.” He gaped for a split second as it registered that she actually quoted the ancient Lannister battle song at him. And then he roared with laughter. He hadn’t at all expected that! Not simply because most people didn’t actually know the words or the significance of it. He was utterly floored, by that and by the fact that it was LADY Sansa who delivered such an unexpected blow.

“Jaime?” He hummed in question around his lingering snickers and drank down the last of his coffee in a bid to get control of himself. Sansa has finished hers also, but she was almost nervously tracing the rim with a delicate finger. “Um... I.” He cocked his head at her in a bid to catch her eye, his concern for what had caused the change in her demeanour ratcheting up with ever deep breath she took. “This is awkward and maybe it’s none of my business and even rude to actually ask, and maybe it will annoy you that I have done so... But Cersei... She’s not alright is she? Like.... I know she still hates me and it’s not entirely unexpected that she does... But? Things are different. To a whole new level I mean. The very fact that I am actually talking to you with how much she despises me is proof enough.” Jaime blew out a long, weary breath and sat up, swinging his legs over the plant his feet into the boards of the dock and leaned his weight into his knees with his elbows. That was a difficult thing to explain and he wasn’t sure how much he SHOULD tell her. How it might effect her to know the truth. He rubbed at his chin and looked over at her, studying her nervous fidgeting and her almost subdued posture. Maybe it wouldn’t be easy for her to hear it and maybe he was being ‘disloyal’ to speak on it out loud too. But she was haunted by the past because his sister wouldn’t let it go.

“No. She isn’t alright. She won’t be alright again - not entirely. That’s NOT your fault in any way Sansa.” He waited until she looked at him and nodded before continuing. “She’s getting the help she needs and at home, for the most part - you wouldn’t know that there was anything different REALLY, except that maybe she’s a bigger bitch than ever. But... Ahh... Anything you say can be twisted around and she’s a lot more volatile. I seem to enrage her just with my presence, because she expects that I will agree with her every word. Before, she would get pissy at me and kick me out or try to convince me that she was right or whatever, when I didn’t blindly do her bidding.” He paused and studied her almost sad countenance. His sisters pain didn’t make her happy and that was the fundamental difference between them. It was obvious that Sansa hated Cersei just as much as his sister hated her, but she wouldn’t wish harm on her because of it. “She didn’t appreciate my saying that Joff deserved the ass kicking he copped from your brothers that day. And refusing to agree to convince Robert AND Joff to see them charged for it fairly well set the tone for where we are now.”  
“I always wondered why they weren’t charged. I expected Cersei would push that, they were technically adults and he a minor.” Jaime hummed quietly in his throat and nudged her knee with his side in a weird sort of understanding gesture. “Robert shamed him into keeping his mouth shut by pointing out that only a weakling throws punches that he can’t take himself. Plus Tyrion promised to personally cover the costs of putting the best legal counsel in Westeros at your disposal to see the favour returned. She expected me to... AVENGE him maybe? And when I wouldn’t she tried to press charges on his behalf but Joff carried on at her for it. It was a bit of a fucking mess actually.” 

He reached out awkwardly and rested his busted hand over her tangled fingers and smiled softly at her sad face. Gods, she was even beautiful when she was utterly heart broken. She showed every single emotion in those beautiful Tully eyes. “You do know none of what happened then was your fault don’t you?” She frowned sadly and looked down at his hand, tangling his fingers in amongst her own gently. “I wanted to break up with him that weekend here, but I.... Gods its so stupid! I actually believed that we were supposed to get married one day and have babies and tie the families together properly. Like it was some fairy tale come to life. So I convinced myself that I was being dramatic about it and making it out to be something it wasn’t in my head. And when he started hitting me... I was just too scared and embarrassed and I figured that it wouldn’t always be like that. Then I walked in on him having sex with some drunk girl at a party and I gave up. He beat me up that day because I had the hide to think I could leave HIM. I should have followed my gut instinct and let it go that weekend. Maybe if I had none of that would have happened.” He scowled hard. The Old anger and disgust with his nephews behaviour rearing up inside of him. He didn’t know if he was his blood like the others were, but he chose to believe he wasn’t. He was as mad as Cersei. Maybe he was his blood and his madness was worse because of the blood being too close. That was why he never actually meant to be a father. She COULDN’T be the mother of his children, because it was too much of a risk biologically. And he never meant to be with anyone but her. Yet she had allowed his children to become a reality, no matter the risks. And they had just struck it very fucking lucky that the two he knew for certain were his, came out unscathed despite the risk taken to give them life.

“Listen to me Sansa.” He cocked a challenging brow when she met his eyes with confusion. “My nephew was the one at fault. For all of it. Perhaps you should have ended it sooner. Personally I think you should have never given him the time of day initially. BUT! You can’t carry the weight of something he did because you might have been able to prevent it if you had done something different long beforehand. There is no way to say that he wouldn’t have done what he did anyway, and every way to know that if he did, he have gotten his ass kicked for it exactly as he did. And his dying was a freak accident. Cersei is the only person in the entire world who could possibly dislike you Sansa. She is also the only one convinced that you have any reason whatsoever to carry blame for any of what happened between you and Joff and subsequently our families. And just between you and me? She’s completely fucking nuts! She has certificates and a whole crazy basket full of medications to prove it. Her opinion is hardly a reliable source.” He grinned wickedly and winked at her, trying to lighten the mood with his jokes at his sisters expense, and thankfully it did actually work. She let out a startled, watery laugh and brushed at her cheeks as though she was wiping the tears that actually didn’t fall with one hand, whilst keeping a strangle hold on his fingers with her other hand. “I feel like you are a completely different person to the man I’ve sort of known in the periphery for near enough to my whole life. It’s weird... But thank you for not acting like I was too delicate for hard truths.” He snorted a laugh and squeezed her hand before pulling his away to put necessary distance between himself and temptation. 

“You make it sound like I’m an old man!” He chuckled at her wide eyed shock and shot her a wink. “Being gentle and Ladylike hardly makes you so delicate in constitution that you can’t handle the truth Sansa. Your mother is proof enough of that. NOW! I heard mention of breakfast and I am feeling that whiskey returning on me so food is necessary. Come on! You can even put me to work with your father and I’ll take the blame for any potential messes to keep the backlash to a polite scolding rather than murder. What do you say?” Sansa smiled so sweetly that he could swear his heart actually flipped like an idiot in his chest. “Come on then! It would make me terrible LADY if I was to let my knight in shining armour starve wouldn’t it!”  
“Indeed it would! I’m keeping this though! It’s bloody freezing out here.”  
“Southerner! This isn’t cold at all!” He laughed happily at her cheek and shook his head as he stood and waved her on. Shuddering slightly when he noted Ned watching them quietly from the door way. Which only served to remind him that for as wonderful as waking to find her there beside him like that and spending such a long time chatting was? It couldn’t ever be anything more than that.

He bailed out after breakfast, once he had eaten and everyone else has trickled in, welcomed by the scent of bacon and eggs and sausage and toast and everything else the two quietest of the Starks thought necessary to feed the masses with. His continuing to wear the soft blanket like a cape had been noted enough times to make him uncomfortable, but no one actually said anything and he didn’t take it off either. Mostly because it was really warm. But also because he was more concerned that it would make it worse if he were to look guilty over absolutely nothing. Partly also because he suspected that it was actually Sansa’s. At least he assumed that was the reason behind the strange looks it caused. And he found it a little bit endearing that she didn’t even notice them. Sadly that also meant that she didn’t notice him in anyway more than what would be expected of her. But that was his pathetic heart speaking for his rational mind again.

And he took advantage of his really not giving a shit about the rest of the Baratheons arriving later in the day, and he knew full well that most everyone else would be out on the water for the day. Even Cersei would be out on a lounger along the shoreline later in the afternoon. He was far more interested in showering and then sleeping a good chunk of the day away in a bid to shake the last of his hangover off. That, and if he wasn’t very fucking careful, his brother would have far too many questions that he really didn’t want to answer. It was safer if he hid out away from the world at large until his disappearance became too obvious; likely around dinner time again.


	4. Chapter 4

FRIDAY: PART TWO

She felt a little silly. All of her panicking and anxiety really had been for naught. Well? Maybe naught was a little ambitious, given what she now knew more about Cersei’s mental state. But in truth dinner had been the only really awkward moment. Otherwise she and Cersei both seemed to be of a mind that it was better that they simply stay far away from each other. So far it had worked. She spent the morning after breakfast on the water with her siblings and friends, making sure to catch up with Myrcella and Tommen both whilst she was still in bed or at least inside, so there was no weird carry on over loyalties, and then when she finally showed outside and took up the same post she always had along the shoreline. Sansa simply conceded territory and took herself off to take a long walk through the woods and flowers with her Bran and her mother. And then she opted to spend the remainder of her day in ‘the tower’. 

She hadn’t actually been joking about the existence of such a place when she mentioned it to Jaime Lannister. It did exist. It was also only actually known to The Starks, because her Uncle had wanted his private sanctuary kept as such. With her as the sole exception. Even her Aunt Lysa never realised what they meant by it she didn’t think. When she was small, she really hadn’t been one for outdoor activities and she often felt a little left out amongst the wilder children because of it. So her Uncle Jon had solved the dilemma of her loneliness, by taking her into his personal wing and allowing her to play at his feet whilst he took some quiet time for himself, to work or read or simply enjoy the stunning views out over the gardens and river and the lush rolling green hills surrounding them. It was her Uncle who had dubbed his lavish solar as her Tower. Because she was Lady Sansa and all little fairytale princesses needed a tower. And he would be her ogre and scare off anyone unworthy so she could await her knight finding her one day. Her TOWER was his solar, and whilst his personal wing was actually the smallest in that it wasn’t actually a ‘wing’ it was the upper two floors over the rear of the open areas of the house. The Solar itself took up the entire third floor and looked almost like a converted attic with its pitched ceiling. Nearly everyone simply assumed it her uncles bedroom suite because of the full wall of tinted windows that could be seen from the back lawns and the water. But the tint prevented anyone from actually seeing into it during the day - from the ground anyway.

The whole ‘wing’ was hers now. As per her uncles specifications, it was to be locked up and kept off limits to everyone but her. Her parents took over disappearing with her at times to spend time in the solar until she was big enough to do so alone, in such a secluded place. And as she got older, she did so less and less, because she actually found common ground with everyone else and started enjoying the outdoors with them. But even still, she wouldn’t actually use any of the other rooms. Her uncles personal belongings had been stored in the master suite and all other bedrooms, including Lysas personal room, continued to be locked up. She did know what was in each room of course, she just never used them. But the solar was her personal retreat now and everyone simply accepted it as normal that she have it, because she had always been Uncle Jon’s favourite little Lady. Of course he loved the others and they all knew it. But he was an older man, very much born of a different generation. He enjoyed observing their antics and even having a laugh with them and roughing their hair and such. But he, like Sansa enjoyed slower paced activities. And she being the little lady she was, enjoyed having someone so focused and interested in those quieter pursuits too. Especially with so many siblings who needed so much supervision.

She wondered if he had ever suspected the issues that would arise in Roberts family too? He was a wonderfully brilliant man, and she knew that he had settled things in a way where Aunt Lysa would be taken care of, respecting the years she spent at his side, but he was smart enough to know that she had married his money too. Cersei was similar in that she and Robert were much more like a marriage alliance for power and money than an actual love match like her parents had been. The difference was that Cersei was used to the lavish lifestyle that Robert could provide, where as her Aunt Lysa hadn’t been. Her mother’s family were well off, but they weren’t even close to the same level as The Arryn family. Cersei and Robert were far more like ‘friends with benefits’ than anything else. Of course she knew that his official reasoning was that her father wouldn’t inherit Winterfell like Robert would Storm’s End and all of the responsibility of the family companies and such that went with it. But she was curious as to whether he had ever noticed the issues that had gone undiagnosed for Cersei. They had never warmed to each other as her mother and he had. She wondered if he maybe knew a lot more about all of their families than he ever let on.

Not for the first time, she wished that he was around for her to talk to now that she was a woman grown herself. She had been so young when he died, but he had always listened and offered her advice, no matter how ridiculous. Her father was good for the cuddles and her mother food for the advice. But there had been times where she wished she could come into this place that he shared with her and crawl into his arms and have him be her ogre again. Maybe she never would have dated Joffrey? Surely he would have told her he wasn’t worthy of her, even if he was Roberts son. And he’d have had quite a bit to say over Harry’s treatment of her! Cousins son or not. Gods! He might have even put a stop to her Aunt Lysas matchmaking! And he certainly wouldn’t have allowed Petyr Baelish anywhere near her! If he had been alive, that snake wouldn’t have been hanging around her Aunt anyway. Or at least not openly. She had never told her parents about the things he had tried to convince her with, or that she had had any contact with him outside of her Aunt at all. After what the boys had done to Joffrey, she hadn’t been game to bring up Petyrs interests in her. Thankfully it was short lived and only damaged things between her and her Aunt whom she had never liked anyway. And as far as her family were concerned, it was her that didn’t want anything to do with any of them now and it was not connected to her. 

She had to give her mother credit. She truly had needed this break with everyone. She HAD been back to Ruby Fort a few times in recent years, just never for the big gathering. And for the few awkward moments, there were moments that were actually really helpful in calming her mind. Who would have thought that Jaime Lannister might be someone she could talk so comfortably with? His kindness had been a relief, especially given her fears of judgement and potential hateful vitriol from his sister. She had always thought that maybe Cella was just showing family loyalty, by loving Jaime perhaps even more than she did Tyrion! But apparently he was just the good person his niece always claimed him to be. At least he apparently could be when the situation called for it. Maybe he hadn’t always been the awful man she thought him. Or maybe his injury or his fight with and subsequent distance from his sister was enough to change? Who knew. 

She smiled to herself and held her hands against her burning cheeks as she looked out over the yard, her eyes landing on the loungers on the dock. She also hadn’t ever noticed how handsome he was. Well she had. She wasn’t exactly blind and he had looked just like what she thought a prince should look like when she was little. But she had never NOTICED him in an appreciative way. Obviously, he was old enough to be her father - though he was actually younger than her Dad too, by a good few years. But still, it was weird! And it had embarrassed her so much that she had found it cute that he looked almost childlike when he woke up all confused and flustered by her. She hadn’t meant to actually WAKE him, she only meant to put the blanket over him and leave the coffee her father had handed her with a silent amused nod of instruction. They had both laughed quietly when they spotted him there and they had both taken pity on him too, for how cold and uncomfortable he had to be. Her Dad wasn’t particularly fond of him, actually she thought DISLIKED and barely tolerated might be a more apt way of putting it, but he was more forgiving than he had been when she was younger. And when she thought about it, they had seemed almost amicable at Robb and Theons wedding. She knew her siblings all got along with him now that they were all adults. Perhaps her theory about him changing in recent years wasn’t so far off. She shook her head to cleared her mind of all but the peace she found in the view and pulled her sketchbook into her lap as she settled into the antique lounger that had been her uncles favourite perch, and settled in to free her mind of everything.

“REPUNZEL! REPUNZEL! LET DOWN YOUR.... AHH... RUBY HAIR!” Sansa startled at the sound of her sisters booming yell, and blinked over at the window, noting that the sun was actually setting. She hadn’t even realised she had zoned out so completely, but the silhouette drawing laying in her lap explained it. She had drawn a young girl sitting on a mans lap before a bank of windows depicting a fairytale landscape, clearly mid story. It made her smile widely. “COME ON LADY SANSA! COME DOWN FROM YOUR TOWER! I’M NO FANCY KNIGHT? BUT I HAVE WHISKEY AND ALL GOOD NORTHERN GIRLS LIKE A GOOD DROP OF WHISKEY! EVEN THE GIRLY ONES!” She giggled at her sister dramatics. They had come a long way since they were kids, now she was probably her favourite person in the world. Jon and Ygritte a close second and Cella and Bran probably up there with them and Marg too. She sat her sketch aside and ducked down the stairs and into one of the bedrooms, unwilling to let her sisters carry on destroy her well cultivated privacy thank you very much. She pushed the window open and beamed down at her cackling sister below her. “WHO DISTURBS MY SLUMBER!” She grinned wickedly and leaned further out to eye her laughing sister. “I’m not coming to steal your wonders! And you’re mixing up your tales sister! You’re a disgrace to fairytale princess lovers everywhere!” She giggled uncontrollably and pin her sister with a disapproving look. “EXCUSE YOU WILDLING! DON’T MAKE ME POINT OUR YOUR LOVE OF CERTAIN TALES!”  
“YOU BROUGHT ALADDIN INTO THIS! THATS LIKE GLOVE SLAPPING ME! NOW HURRY UP! LORAS IS THREATENING TO SEARCH YOU OUT!”

Sansa laughed heartily and waved over at her friend in greeting, apparently he and Renly has finally arrived. “TYPICAL! I GET A PRETTY FAIRYTALE PRINCE WANTING ENTRY INTO MY TOWER AND HES GAYER THAN MY BROTHER AND HIS HUSBAND COMBINED!” She giggled profusely as all of them burst out laughing at her. Poor Arya was doubled over on her back on the grass struggling to breathe because of it. She didn’t often carry on like they did, but that had been fun. “GET OUT HERE SANS OR IM CALLING MARGY AND TELLING HER YOU WANT HER TO SET YOU UP WITH SOMEONE!” She squeaked indignantly and gaped at him. Utterly horrified! “THAT IS NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT FUNNY LORAS! YOU MAKE A TERRIBLE GALLANT KNIGHT! LET IT BE KNOWN THAT MY SISTER MAKES A BETTER FAIRYTALE PRINCE THAN YOU DO! SHE AT LEAST OFFERED WHISKEY!”  
“SEE THIS? MY PHONE IS IN MY HAND! I AM NOT BLUFFING!” She let out a scream of frustration and pouted at her grinning cousin. Silently begging him to help her. And then she cackled just like Arya as Ygritte slipped around behind him and stole the offending device clean out of his fingers and then bowed dramatically to her. “YOU LADS NEED TO UP YA GAME! THE LITTLE WOLFLING AND I ARE PUTTIN YA TO SHAME! COME ON SANS! WE GOT YOU YOUR OWN BOTTLE SO YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TO SHARE! AND THIS HANDSOME PRINCE HERE HAS ALREADY FIRED UP THE PIZZA OVEN!” Ygritte patting Tyrions jaw affectionately and calling him a handsome prince was almost as funny as her stealing Loras’ phone had been. And Tyrion’s perfectly timed bow and dramatic smacking kiss to her hand was funnier still. “FINE! BUT NEXT TIME? ARYA HAS TO CLIMB UP PROPERLY! WITH A ROPE! I DON’T REQUIRE SUCH COMMITMENT TO MY FANTASIES AT THE RISK OF SCALP! BUT SOME EFFORT WOULD BE NICE!”

She shoved Loras off playfully when he wrapped her up in a crushing bear hug and laid a smacking kiss to her cheek. “Hello darling!” She scoffed and turned her nose up primly, making him laugh at her and shove her away to hug Renly in greeting. “Don’t you darling me! Traitor! You’ve sealed your fate! Granny Olenna is now officially my favourite Tyrell!” Loras waved her off nonchalantly as she pressed a kiss to Renlys cheek in return for his own quiet greeting. “Please! Granny is everyone’s favourite Tyrell.” He did have a point. For as scandalous as the old lady was,  
AND as embarrassing as she could be with her brutal honesty, she was an utter delight to be around. And those of her siblings and the Baratheons of their generation agreed without even needing to think about it.

She was more than pleased to find that the atmosphere surrounding the now extended family gathering on actually increased in relaxed ease as the night carried on. Carried along with plenty of laughter and party like revelry, filling, delicious home made, wood fire baked pizzas and copious amounts of alcohol. The less formal setting and larger numbers also ensured that there were no awkward lulls in conversation thanks to the tension between she and Cersei and there was no real chance they would be forced into interacting either. As she was content to drink and laugh with Robert and a few of the older generation, oddly her mother included. Though she did avoid her Dads notice where she could. And curiously no one drew attention to the fact that she probably shouldn’t drink heavily with her medication. But she certainly wasn’t about to bring it up! Tywin was even relieved of his watch somewhat, and could relax a touch and engage in conversation with Stannis Baratheon and her Uncle Benjen who had also arrived earlier that day. A point that was actually allowed because her clear hate for her was kept to the odd glare and thankfully no obvious sign of impending confrontation. 

Sansa was happy to take full advantage too, happily buzzing from her glasses of whiskey, and lazing comfortably into the large swinging bench she had laid claim to before the larger of the three lit fire pits, wrapped in her hand knitted wool throw - the one she hadn’t lent to Jaime Lannister and forgotten to get back. “Lady Sansie!” She groaned in annoyance as her brothers husband flopped down beside her setting the swing to rock far too roughly for her liking and then dropping his big head onto her lap with a heavy sigh. “Can I help you Theon?” The fool hummed happily and wiggled to make himself comfortable, completely ignoring her noise of indignation. “The roof is spinning Sannie! I need you to look after me because Robb is too drunk.” She rolled her eyes and flicked his nose just because she could. “Nothing is spinning, we are outside so there is no roof, you rocked the swing I was quite happily sitting on ALONE! And I think you may just be as drunk as Robb.”  
“DAMN! That mean I get to have drunk sex do ya think?” She choked and actually almost spat her whiskey all over him. Theon was always a bit vulgar, but he knew not to discuss his and Robbs sex life like he used to his conquests when he was younger and still confused about who he was, with any of their siblings, ESPECIALLY HER! Not because they were gay, but because his sex life was now also her brothers sex life. She slapped his chest for it and glared down at him. “Firstly! You know better than to discuss such things with me! And secondly, for the purposes of expediency, and thus my sanity and my stomach contents? Your husband - who is not my big brother for the duration of this talk by the way! Is as drunk as you are and though I’m not exactly an expert? I was of a mind that alcohol tended to make things a little difficult to sustain when as wiped as you clearly are. Perhaps you can hold off until you are sober and NEVER speak of it to me again. What do you think?”

“Hey! Fine, you’re probably right! You know? Tyrell probably was earlier too! You should let Margy organise a hook up for you Sans! You’re wound tighter than a taut bow strong little lady! When’s the last time you got laid?” She gaped in outright shock. Completely floored and incredibly insulted by basically being called uptight. “Shove off Greyjoy! Marg would break our Lady by picking her some kinky old horn bag who likes dress ups and they will scar her for life, leading to a lifetime of hiding in her tower! BESIDES! Your poor simple man brain may not realise it, but us girls can sort that out well enough without involving a cock that’s probably attached to someone completely unworthy of our girl. Leave her alone.” She closed her eyes in defeated horror as Arya weighed in and set the glass aside to drink straight from her bottle. She needed the liquid courage for this crap. “It’s Stark now RUNT! Remember? Married the hot Stark and took his name and all! And what’s wrong with dressing up? There are way more disturbing kinks and fetishes out there! I DO AGREE with the unworthy dick owner bit though. Pick a better one next time Sans! Hardyng was an ass who clearly had a small and unsatisfactory penis. We can discuss what’s best in that department later. I’ve got your back darlin!” She blinked repeatedly at the fire, trying desperately to tamp down her frustration and mortification and failing miserably. So she settled for petty revenge over rage and rocked the swing just enough to have her brothers idiot of a husband loose his balance and fall off onto the grass completely. “Oops.”

She smiled dangerously down at him as he whined and rubbed at his head utterly confused, whilst everyone else doubled over laughing at what she had done. “Come on big guy! Yg and I are heading to bed, think we can manage making sure you and snuggles over there get to your own bed safely.” She smiled sweetly and tipped her cheek when Jon stumbled forward slightly to give her a kiss goodnight before hauling Theon up and steadying him awkwardly, more than a little bit cheery himself, whilst Ygritte pulled out the big guns with Robb and offered a hug if he moved his ass. “When you don’t get baked goods tomorrow? You’ll have no one to blame but yourself. Remember that.”  
“What?! Why would I be in Lady Sansies bad books? I perfectly supportive! She’s too nice to hold it against me that I know her dickhead ex was a bad root Targrin - that’s a shit name Jon. Too hard to say. You should change it to snow. Snow is easy to say! Jon SNOW! What ya recon Ygs? Better than you having to be Ygritte Targaaaaaahrin! That’s fucked! Snow is better.” The look on Jon’s face actually helped to calm her annoyance. Theon was an annoying but affectionate drunk, and he didn’t actually mean to be mean about his rambling, he just had no self control or filter, which was why he tended to drink less the older he got. Robb was the messy one usually. And he NEEDED to be hugged or petted or he sulked.

“Oh he is going to be so crook tomorrow! I can’t wait to let Nym into their room first thing! I’ll send her for a swim first!” She gave in and giggled at her sisters excited revenge plot. She hadn’t even noticed the wolves were there, apparently her uncle Benjen must have brought them down with him. She wasn’t surprised she hadn’t seen them either though. They would have gone straight for the water and then the bushes and if they were back, they were all sleeping in the massive nest of bedding in the boat shed. “Send Shaggy too, I normally wouldn’t condone something that will potentially result in me having to help clean up a huge mess? But Theon deserves it after that and it’ll be worth it!” Arya waved at her dramatically as she swallowed down a big gulp like her own whisky was water. “Stuff that! I’ll make them clean it up too! He will do it when he works out he actually told YOU his personal thoughts on Harry.” She scoffed lightly and took another swig. “And the next person who mentions him in my presence, or their thoughts on his lack of SKILL, or conversely, My none existent romantic life, is going to wake to find themselves floating downstream on an blow up bed. You have been warned. When did talking about this become acceptable?” Tyrion snickered to himself, from beside where Renly and Loras had flopped on the grass together. “Oh my darling Lady Sansa! Everybody talks about sex! And it’s completely acceptable unless descriptive details are being giving out around siblings or parents and such. YOU are just better than us mere mortals with your lack of vulgarity and corruption.”  
“Ha! Watch it Lannister! It’s a known fact round here that parents don’t have sex! They perform a very private, very vanilla duty for the sole purpose of begetting children! Five times for Cat and Neddy was a bit wild compared to your old man getting a double hitter straight out of the gates! But that’s ALL THAT HAPPENS!”  
“OH MY SWEET SUMMER CHILD!”  
“LALALALA I CANT HEAR YOU!”

————————

“How is it, that you are the last Stark standing? That bottle is half gone!” Sansa jumped in surprise and spun to look over her shoulder at the elder Lannister brother strolling towards her, full glass in hand. She thought everyone had gone to bed, him included. Though perhaps he had just carried poor Tyrion after he and Arya faced off with Gendry and Renly and Loras in a shots battle of man versus giants. It had gotten messy, fast! The only others who she suspected might still be up and about were Bran, Rick and Tom who had bailed out hours before hand to play video games in the back games room. Even Cella and Shireen had stumbled off giggling together. She slid over and made room on the slightly more stable than her swing, double lounger strategically placed facing the fire. “That’s simple! I’m not an idiot. Plus! I have a pretty high tolerance. I’m Northern and much stronger than I look.” She grinned cheekily as he lowered himself into the lounger beside her with an annoying amount of casual grace. “Ahh! So what you mean to say is, you don’t drink to get drunk, but to enjoy the taste of whiskey huh?” She hummed in agreement and allowed him to inspect the bottle in her hand quickly, before topping both their glasses up at his nod and quick swallow of what his already had in it. “Expensive taste too I see. I didn’t pick you for a hard liquor girl either.” She hummed in amusement and snuggled in, lifting her throw without thinking and offer him half. He blinked in surprise but shrugged and tucked it over his lap.

“I feel like I’m shocking you by not fitting into an exacting set of expectations. And I’m a people pleaser! Don’t make me feel bad!” His cocky, charming smile was actually pretty disarming. Gods he was a beautiful man to look at. “A good girl huh?” She squeaked in surprise and bit her lip and scrunched up her face as it burned. Whether he meant that as the innuendo it had come across as or not? It actually touched on a place in her mind where NO ONE had ever gone and hopefully NO ONE would ever know of. “Ahhh. Interesting. Don’t worry Red. I won’t mention it around your insane and intrusive siblings if you promise not to float me down the river!” She flushed all over again and let out a small, evil laugh as she eyed him as innocently as she could. “I promise... Daddy.” And then she roared with laughter as he choked on the sip she had timed her words around him taking, until tears streamed down her face. Her own embarrassment over saying something so... INAPPROPRIATE to Jaime Lannister was worth it to see him sputtering so. “Oh sweet girl that is not a game you want to start with me.” She couldn’t stop the giggles bubbling out at his confused but curious look. He didn’t know whether she was playing with him or if he’d have to actually turn her down awkwardly and it was hilarious! She poked his very firm chest with a pointy finger. “I believe YOU started it! Can I ask you something?” He plucked her hand away and straightened her fingers out gently and curiously? Pushed it back down over his chest like that. Making her heart rate kick up, all of a sudden, very aware of how closely they were sitting, and apparently freely touching. When and how that happened she didn’t actually know. It just felt natural. Which was weird.

“What do you want to ask me Red?” She hummed quietly almost in confused question and then it clicked. She had gotten distracted by the feel of the hard, warm muscles under her hand and his thigh pressing against her and the odd pulse down below that she hadn’t had cause to notice for quite some time now. “I... um... How is it that you are still a bachelor? You don’t seem like the type to NEED variety like Tyrion claims to? I don’t get it? Are you just not interested in having a relationship or?” She wasn’t expecting him to laugh quite as darkly as he did. She wasn’t expecting him to laugh at all. Take offence or tell her to mind her own business - which she normally would but it was the drink talking and she couldn’t stop it coming out. But she didn’t expect sardonic amusement. “Ahh little Lady that’s a loaded question. And if you want answers, you have to put the ex back on the table for discussion AND show me your tower.” She cocked her head curiously in thought and studied his face. He really was exceptionally good looking, even more so than he had been when he was younger. And she stood without thinking, lifting her rug back around her shoulders, and tucking the bottle in the crook of her arm, leaving her a hand free to hold out to him. “Fine. But know that you’ve somehow talked your way into my inner sanctuary. The one place in the world that I can be completely at ease. And you have to swear to never tell anyone the truth of it, or that you’ve seen it.” He blinked up at her in astonishment and swallowed hard, but took her hand gently and laced their fingers together. “Shall I actually get on my knees and vow to keep your counsel My Lady?” She giggled and bumped his shoulder playfully as they strolled up to the back door off the big industrial kitchen. “Will you lay your sword at my feet too?” He grinned at her and pulled an exaggerated thinking face. “I don’t actually own one - though there are ceremonial ones and historical replicas at Casterly Rock. They decorate the walls in the HALL OF HEROES. But will my service weapon suffice do you suppose? Modernise the fairytale a bit?”  
“Careful now! You’re beginning to sound very gallant Indeed Ser!”  
“Maybe I meant to.”

Her heart was in her throat. She had absolutely no idea what she was doing! All she knew was that it was both VERY WRONG and incredibly exciting too. She never let her hair down really, she always, always did the right thing and yet still she got crapped on by The world! All of the reasons that flirting with Jaime were wrong paled in the face of how good it felt to just embrace his company. She’d deal with the fallout tomorrow. For the time being though. She locked the heavy double doors behind them. Her family knew not to disturb her or search her out and not to worry if she locked the doors. Not that they would go looking for her in the middle of the night when they were all sleeping heavily from having more than a few drinks anyway. But she certainly didn’t need anyone else deciding to investigate just where she had come from earlier in the evening. “Jon’s private rooms?” She hummed in affirmation and smiled over her shoulder at him, not worrying about turning on any lights at all until they hit the stairs discreetly place behind a false wall. The exact reason no one else had ever actually managed to find their way into the big room. It was a sneaky little quirk that her uncle had put in purely because he knew she would get a kick out of the secrecy of it. 

She opened it up and flicked the light on before tugging on his hand in invitation. Her belly was a riot of butterflies at the prospect of actually sharing this. She honestly believed she would only ever share it with the man she married and later, her children, when they took over the wing properly as their own on visits... One day. Yet now she was showing Jaime Lannister as if it wasn’t something she had dreamed of sharing with someone important. Her dreams of fairytale love hadn’t exactly panned our anyway, so why not share it with a friend instead. He at least might appreciate it. Harry hadn’t even bothered to come with her the few times she had invited him to the manor. Which probably should have told her something. “Red? Wait a minute.” She paused and looked up at him in question, settling her foot back on the floor properly and off the very first step. “I get the impression that this is a pretty important place for you.... I actually thought you were kidding about having a secret tower that you hide in. But I remember how close you were with your uncle. This is where you would spend time with him when you were little isn’t it?” She smiled widely and nodded, turning her face to look up the stairs sadly. “He was my favourite person in the whole world. He was never too busy for me when we were here. And he didn’t get sick of my need to be a princess or my singing and dancing about while he worked. He never made me feel bad because I didn’t exactly fit in or because I wanted to be the picture perfect lady.”

She smiled sadly again and looked back into his clearly concerned and slightly nervous looking face. “Why would you let me talk you into bringing me up here? If I had realised the significance I wouldn’t have teased you about it at all, let alone enough that you would show me? Has anyone else ever been up there?” And that sealed it for her. That was exactly why she had readily agreed to let him up there. He did understand. Only days ago she’d have laughed at the idea that he, of all people would get it. And yet. She nodded and lead him up the stairs slowly. “My family are the only ones who have ever been in here. Uncle Jon’s rooms are locked unless I’m in here. Dad gave me the keys when I turned eighteen. Apparently it was actually in his will that they be locked up for me and me alone. That’s why none of the rest of you even knew what was up here. I don’t think even Robert came up here when Uncle Jon was alive.” Jaime whistled softly in surprise and studied her openly. Obviously curious about her bond with the man. “He loved you like his own granddaughter. Not just his ‘sons’ child like the rest. You he took on personally like he did Robert and your father?” She hummed in affirmation and blushed slightly, pausing on the landing and resting her hand on the light switch for a moment as she stared back at him. “Mama said it was because I was an old soul. Just like him. And my Dad.” He held her back with a tighter grip and stepped closer, crowding her a little. She like that she had to look up at him. She wasn’t used to men being that much taller than her. “Are you sure you want me to be here with you?” She smiled sheepishly and nodded. “We would still be drinking good whiskey by the fire if I didn’t Jaime. You promised not to share that I let you up here and I trust you to keep your word and... You understand what it means to me, which only my uncle and my parents ever really have. My siblings do to, to a degree. But you are arguing about it right now because you do. So yes. You may see my tower Jaime.”  
“You TRUST me?” She huffed a laugh and rolled her eyes as she dropped his hand to pat his jaw playfully. “Apparently so. Now come on! We have half a bottle of very good, very expensive liquor and a house full of sleeping drunks that are too far away to be disturbed!” She flicked the low lights on and stepped inside towards the big open fireplace, flicking on the gas burners to light it to take the chill off the room. So that she could ignore the riot taking place in her stomach. She had no idea why she was so nervous. He was just a friend of sorts and it was just a room after all. And even if it was slightly romantic, despite the heavy drinking? It wasn’t really either. “So? Are you going to answer my question now?”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’d apologise... But I’m not sorry! I will offer warning, that I get a bit carried away. ENJOY? And feel free to correct any mistakes I may have made!

FRIDAY NIGHT:

His heart was in his fucking throat as he followed behind her and took in the massive room. Tyrion had always had different ideas of what was behind those huge windows that overlooked everything and reflected back from the outside so you couldn’t see into them from the ground below. He always figured it was probably just the actual master bed suite. But Lady Sansa’s Tower made a WHOLE lot more sense now. He hadn’t even registered that she used to disappear for hours on end with Jon when she was little, and that he would play into her playing princess and talk about guarding her in her tower. But the old bastard had actually given the girl exactly that. Of course you could tell it had been his hideaway from the world before it became theirs and then hers. But his devotion to the only one out of the children who actually sought him out to spend time with him was clear. He loved the others too, and they saw him as a bit of a grandpa too. But Sansa, now that he thought on it, was always gliding along holding his hand. She would have had to have been around eleven or twelve when he died, but still she didn’t need to MAKE TIME for Jon Arryn. Their relationship was actually very sweet. In any other circumstances, with a man less deserving of respect and in possession of less honour, one might find it odd for a rich old man with an estranged mad woman for a gold digging wife, to spend so much time alone with a young girl who called him uncle, would seem wrong on many levels. But there was simply no question as to the appropriateness of their relationship. It was completely innocent.

The fact that she so readily and happily agreed to share this with him was... Overwhelming. It was rather obvious that he had fallen hard for her, he had been well on the way to doing so just from his ridiculous crush and stalker tendencies. But he knew it was exactly that when he laid the blanket she had lent him on his bed to stripped down and shower, earlier. He was Jaime Fucking Lannister. Arrogant, cocky, reclusive, self proclaimed bachelor. He had very obviously and loudly refused to settle down, no matter his fathers demands. He was married to his career and in secret for the majority of his life, a woman he couldn’t ever and shouldn’t ever have. And he was undone by a fucking blanket. An incredibly soft, and warm, hand knitted blanket, with swirling initials embroidered perfectly in one corner. He was in love with a girl he could NEVER have as his. Whilst clearly she didn’t even realise it. As evidenced by her nervous reaction to his pressing her hand over his chest and forcing her to see just how close they were. She had been affected too, that was obvious. But she brushed it off too. Which was probably wise. It would be hard enough for him to not screw everything up by projecting his feelings on her, if she hadn’t. Especially with how touched he was that she would share this incredible place with him. Especially with the alcohol thrumming nicely in his blood. Especially with how fucking beautiful she was when she relaxed a bit and unwound. He had very likely given himself away to his brother at least, possibly his father too if he was really unlucky. By watching her far too intently once they all settled in around the fires for a few drinks. He knew it, but he couldn’t help it. It was a bloody good thing he hadn’t been sitting anywhere near his sister for her to notice too.

“So? Are you going to answer my question now?” He turned to take her in quietly, smiling at the gentle blush on her cheeks and the way she tucked her hair behind her ear shyly. He had been so lost to his thoughts and his study of the room around him that he hadn’t noticed her turning the heat on and placing her bottle and glass on a small side table. “I will, if you still want to hear it? Can we sit somewhere? That sofa maybe?” She smiled softly and picked up her supplies again with a jaunty little step and a playful smile. “This one. It’s my favourite spot. The view is incredible - when it isn’t dark out of course! Come on! We can fit and you may share my blanket again too if you want! Seeing as though my spare has seemingly disappeared!” He huffed a disbelieving laugh and almost groaned over her wanting to sit on the wide reclining divan type of thing she had waved at, together - under a blanket. She was going to kill him, but he wanted to sit close to her too. Even if it was akin to torture for him. “It’ll show up eventually I’m sure. I do have to admit though? If it is anything like this one? It may just get stolen.” He winked cheekily and settled down into the seat beside her, letting her wiggle around and half lean into him to get comfortable and then accepting the blanket easily. “Rude!” He chuckled softly and waggled his brows at her. He wouldn’t actually steal it. Even if he was tempted. And she would know that he was only playing... Hopefully. “RIGHT! Explain myself... I won’t give actual details alright?”  
She hummed happily in acceptance and popped her chin on her hand, leaning her elbow into the back of the lounger beside his shoulder to face him. “I’m not actually adverse to relationships. Actually I think you and I might just suffer from similar issues. I have no real interest in senseless dating. I’m not going to waste my time with people who I have no intentions of having more with. I was in a very serious, long term relationship for a very long time, until maybe a handful of years ago. But it was kept completely private because it wasn’t exactly something either of us wanted known. That’s not true actually? I might not have minded, but there was no way my father was accepting it. So it was easier to just... Refuse to indulge his demands for me to settle down and have my private life kept private. She would never have admitted to our relationship. In the end I realised that I didn’t want something if I had to hide it like that. Not long term anyway, and she accepted it assuming I’d come back around when I got over my little tantrum. I did not and I have not looked back. Not in a long time anyway. I have had a few friendly type of situations, if you will, since then. But nothing that could possibly be that elusive MORE. I have also had more Tyrion like moments too, but those are even rarer. I say that you and I have this in common because I don’t really believe in wasting time, either mine or another’s. And given what my father expects, should he get wind of me seeing anyone or even showing mild interest he will push it in an attempt for it to be serious, even if it’s not. Hence the Batchelor lifestyle.”

He waited quietly as she processed his words and thought it over. It was pretty obvious that she was stuck on WHY someone would have to hide such a relationship, but he was hoping she just assumed that she was married and distasteful to his Father for a plethora of many reasons none of which included incest. “Maybe we are a bit alike in that then. I tend to see things that aren’t really there. I don’t want to practice for the real thing - which is kind of how I think of that whole playing the field type of attitude? I just want the real thing you know? I have no interest in having a huge list of sexual CONQUESTS or whatever. I want it to mean something. And at the same time, I don’t want to wind up in a position to walk in on my boyfriend fucking some random girl again. What kind of message is that do you think? Two actual serious relationships, one high school, one university and BOTH times I walk in on them cheating on me?” Jaime scowled and then snorted. “I’d say it says you have shit taste to pick little boys who clearly can’t see what they have is better than they deserve or will ever know again.” He cocked a brow in challenge and sipped at his drink as she smiled bashfully at him from under her lashes. “Want to know something pathetic?” He leaned in close at her blushing request and waited. “I never slept with Joff. We fooled around a bit because he wouldn’t let it go that I wasn’t ready. My walking in on him was staged. He did that on purpose to make a point.” He blinked in surprise and flopped back slightly to study her terribly embarrassed countenance. 

THAT information explained quite a bit. And now he had a few sneaking suspicions that he wasn’t sure he could actually get away with asking without thoroughly embarrassing her. He would try anyway, because at the very least, he could offer to be that confidant for her if she wanted. And she most definitely needed it by the looks of things. “And The other wanker?” She grimaced a bit and downed her glass quickly in a single mouthful. So he took it and reached out to refill it whilst he waited. “Harry. I did go on a few dates before I met him. Nothing ever come of any of them though. And of course... It wasn’t easy to get past everything with Joffrey. Besides him actually hitting me and stuff, and then dying like that... I was actually pretty terrified of the whole idea. He was the logical, easy choice and I assumed it would be forever. Naive little thing that I am. But Harry was exactly that - another logical choice I guess. He was handsome and he come from a good family, he’s actually a distant cousin to Elbert Arryn, Uncle Jon’s nephew who took over the companies and inherited Eyrie Manor. Aunt Lysa actually introduced us - which should have told me everything. But... You won’t tell anyone any of this right?” He frowned at her in confusion and shook his head. He wasn’t sure where this was going, but he was sure that he wasn’t going to like it. “Well? We had been dating for a little while and he seemed almost too good to be true. We wanted the same things and he was sweet and funny and in my head it was perfect right? But then Aunt Lysas creepy husband kept sort of implying that I should ‘make him happy’ and snatch him up quickly. Keep him interested. He’s a vile man. But it turned out that they kind of set us up because they were swindled out of the Arryn fortune and thought that Harry was the key to getting their hands on more of it or something? I don’t know the actual details, only that they are both utterly insane. And then Baelish got a bit carried away with his advice and GUIDANCE and he actually kissed me one day and Lysa saw it. I freaked and run to Harry over it, and I do have to give credit to him - He did scare them away from me and made sure Elbert heard about their carry on. But then just like Joff? Perfect started to morph slowly into reality.... He’d criticise my hair or my clothes, even my weight sometimes. What I’d eat. And I took it all, just as I did with Joff. I actually did sleep with him though... I found it a bit boring after a while, not exactly what I was expecting anyway. Turns out that he had this image of what he wanted too. The pretty, very well connected, trophy wife from a rich family. I was to be kept in a display case I guess, only brought out for duty or whatever. And he’d have his girls on the side for his actual interests, because ‘Sans! Babe? I know you are new to this all, but a man has whores for the things that his wife shouldn’t be doing. It’s just how it works!’”

Jaime sputtered in shock and glared at her in utter disbelief. “What? He said that to you?” She hummed in affirmation and smacked her lips noisily around her glass again. “You have to be kidding? What was he doing with his ‘whores’ and what... I am so confused and I kind of want to shoot him.” The sweet little thing beside him fell into his side giggling and shaking her head. “I can’t believe I’m actually telling you any of this! I’ve never actually spoken on all of it! Marg knows about this bit and about Petyr trying to kiss me and being grabby at times. But no one else even knows I spoke to him away from Aunt Lysa. And I wasn’t about to detail the things Harry said and did, to my siblings was I?”  
“Not now that Jon is actually lethally trained at any rate.” She giggled again and nodded against his shoulder where she was hiding her face. “Tell me?” He was actually almost begging at this point, but it was pretty obvious she wanted to get it out and he liked her snuggling against him too much to want to slow up their conversation too. “He’s the only person I’ve ever been with. I wanted to only ever be with the one I married you know? I know that’s antiquated and a little unrealistic these days but still... Anyway! He um... I thought it was pretty normal, I figured he just wasn’t into anything a bit different or whatever so I accepted it, and suppressed those thoughts... YOU KNOW? Fantasies I guess? And I would lay there and let him go and bemoan the fact that sex just wasn’t as fun as everyone always raves on about. Meanwhile he is actually having the fun stuff with anyone and everyone else, including not technically legal girls near enough to a decade his junior! And from what I figured from his words? His ‘Things not done with your future wife’ wouldn’t have even scratched the surface of some of the things I’ve fantasised over since learning from Marg just how poor my sexual education had been.”

“Seven fucking hells. What are you doing to me Red! First of all? You have shit taste in men. Join the party I always have had shit taste too! Second? I’m coming to visit when you go back to the Vale and we are planning some elaborate revenge plot for this guy because my Gods! If you don’t agree to it? I’m driving up there just to punch him in the face. And third and definitely most importantly? If you keep talking about your fantasies or potential kinks, or teasingly calling me Daddy? I’m going to do something incredibly stupid, like offer to fuck you six ways from Sunday, all weekend long so you can at least understand what it is to have great sex and have your needs AND fantasies seen to. And for as much as that is EXACTLY what I actually WANT to do, it is also ill advised. We are both very drunk and I’m fairly confident I don’t need to explain the serious issues involved.” He pinched his eyebrows together with his finger and thumb and slammed his head back into the cushioned back. Fucking horrified that he had actually let his baser self speak at all, let alone so rudely and... Seven Hells he couldn’t believe he just said that. He could feel her shifting around next to him, feel her eyes staring at him intently. If she had been sober she probably would have slapped him and refused to ever speak to him again. But the more time he spent with her, the more he felt like there was a bit of a wild wolf inside, like she was repressing all the things that didn’t fit her perfect Lady image and the alcohol and their candid conversations were drawing her out. And he was fucking hooked. Like a junky chasing a fix, he wanted to pull that girl out and help her understand that she could be both without breaking herself or shattering her dreams. Except that it really shouldn’t be him to show her that for so many very real reasons. “Is it weird if I ask you something else connected to that?” He groaned loudly and turned his head to frown at her, sighing heavily as he caved far too easily. “Ask Sansa.” His voice cracked as she screwed her face up adorably and stared straight down into her lap, taking deep fortifying breaths to steady herself. “Would you actually object to me calling you Daddy and umm.... acting out that sort of role play? And where exactly would you stand on me umm... Being on top?”

“Did you seriously just ask me if you can ride my cock and call me Daddy whilst doing so?” He was dreaming. It was as simple as that. He had passed out outside again and he was dreaming that his innocent little lady was actually a siren straight out of his fantasies. Apparently his shock and awe didn’t translate well though, if the way she curled in on herself was any indication. “Fucking hells Baby! I’m having a very hard time controlling myself right now. So you need to be very clear here with me alright?” He reached out and tugged her face around close to his, forcing her eyes up to look at him and he had all the answers he needed. Her every desire was burning in those beautiful depths like blue fire and he was done. “Say it. In words right now.” His eyes tracked the pink tongue that darted across the pillow of her bottom lip. “Please Jaime? I-” He didn’t let her finish. He pushed in and kissed her with everything he had. Licking into her mouth the second her lips parted under his. Sucking at her lips, stealing her breath and the glass from her hand to blindly put down on the table and then she was in his lap, his hand gripping her perfect ass tight while he bucked and rolled against her. She pulled away on a gasp and ripped her shirt up and over her head, blinking at him wide eyed in a mix of shock and disbelief and hunger and just a touch of vulnerability. She was utterly perfect. “Fuck me you are beautiful baby. Off! Everything off. Birth control? Before I forget?”

“Umm... I’m on the pill and I haven’t since Harry.” He nodded and slapped her ass, making her whimper. “Good. I hate condoms. I’m clean. And fair warning. I am going come all over these perfect tits before we are done this weekend. And I am keeping these.” He fingered at the lacy panties he could see now that her trousers had been undone. And then he met her eye to make sure he hadn’t pushed too hard, only to find her panting in anticipation and it was the sexiest thing he had ever fucking seen. “I don’t really actually know how, obviously.” He nodded and ripped his shirt off, followed quickly by his awkwardly wiggling to get his trousers and boxers down and free his aching cock. He squeezed himself hard when he looked up and found her naked but for the bra, eyeing his cock like she wanted to feast on it. No stretch of his vast imagination could have given him that image. “Do you want to suck Daddy’s cock pretty girl?” She fucking whimpered and he almost came on the spot and then she blinked at him innocently and nodded as she bit her lip. “If you want Daddy’s cock in your mouth you will have to ask nicely.” She pouted at him and blushed almost giving herself away with a nervous giggle. “Please May I suck your cock Daddy? Please?” He cursed softly and nodded holding a hand out to her so she could kneel like he indicated for her to do. And then he used both hands to brush her hair away and hold it gently out of her face in a fist. “No teeth, use your hand for anything that doesn’t fit comfortably and if you don’t want me coming in your mouth say so now.” She scrunched up her face and squeaked slightly and the smiled up at him so trustingly. He was going to burn in the seventh hell for it, but he really didn’t care. “I want you to.” He groaned and nodded for her to go ahead and then almost dived off the seat completely when her soft hand found his aching cock and then her hot little tongue darted out nervously. 

“Is this? I don’t really know what I’m doing with any of this Jaime.” He winced and met her eye slowly as she rubbed at him and continued licking and lapping at him. “Baby? You are perfect. You can’t really fuck up a blow job. We like to think we are particular about these things but really? Your mouth is on and around my cock and that’s all I can process. Alright?” He cursed softly and tightened his hold on her hair as she engulfed him in her hot mouth and sucked and wrapped and rolled her tongue around him and then sucked again over and over. “That’s it baby. Perfect. Such a good girl. Keep going exactly like that. And move your hand over me while you do.” He was going out of his mind! This had to be a dream! Except that it felt too good. To realistic. She was clearly unpracticed at such things, but that actually only added to his pleasure. And as he said, she could hardly screw it up, all he cared about was that her hot, sweet, mouth was on him. 

He shouldn’t have looked down. But he would never ever forget that image for as long as he lived. Those big blue eyes and that soft pink mouth taking him in and that sweet blush and little squirming wiggle that told him sucking his cock was arousing her. “That’s perfect my sweet girl. Daddy’s going to come now. You ready?” She nodded enthusiastically and he was utterly broken, he groaned loudly and held her hair tight, bucking slightly and nudging her throat as he pulsed deep in her mouth, feeling her swallowing around him to drinking it down bringing more forth until he was spent. “Sansa. Fucking hells! Come up here baby.” He pulled her up and into his lap and dived in to kiss her deeply, chasing his own flavours on her tongue as he pulled her hard against his chest and reached to unclip her bra blindly. “I’m going to need a few minutes Red. How do you feel about me returning the favour? I want you to come all over my face and tongue. But for this you have to call me by name.” He grinned wickedly against her lips as she shyly nodded and got to work. His girl was little more than a sweet, shy virgin, but by the Gods she was a passionate thing who knew exactly what she wanted in theory. And he was fucking chuffed to be the one she chose to practice on. The one who got to see her teeter between her nerves and her needs. If only he could also be the only one she ever knew like it. Just as she had said she hoped only to know the man she married.

He wasted no time at all after he made her cry his name out a second time just because he could and because he had never heard anything so fucking sweet before. He lifted her almost limp form into his arms and wrapped her around himself tightly as she settled and come down again. It pleased him immensely to know that he was the first to show her that pleasure. It had him downright crowing internally that she would remember exactly who she had been so free and open with because she had called his name so prettily. And part of him was astonished too. He always thought those men who claimed giving oral sex to be even better than actually getting it, were utterly mad. But now he understood. He had never found it to be particularly arousing. He enjoyed it and was more than happy to do it. But he didn’t really ever get anything more than the praise of bringing his lover off so well. Yet he had almost come more than once eating Sansa out and he was rock hard again, far sooner than he expected to be. But he was good with waiting for her to come around too, her soft belly pressing against him was even nicer still than the pride he felt at doing that to her. “You alright?” She practically purred into his neck and rubbed against him languidly. “I want you.” He grinned and turned his face to cuddle into her and breath over her ear a bit. “I’m all yours Sansa. How do you want me?” He felt her swallowing and nudging at him with her nose. He pressed a soft kiss to her jaw and stroked her back as he waited. “Can you maybe make love to me? With me on top? I don’t want... It’s stupid... But I want to know how that feels more than anything else and.... It should actually kind of mean SOMETHING in here.” He hushed her quickly and kissed her again. “Absolutely. Lift up and... I want you to look at me, if we are making love rather than just having sex? I need to see your eyes.” He was going to burn in the deepest pits. But at least it’d be through the highest peaks that he travelled there. He held her eyes deeply as he notched himself in place and slid home, cradling the beautiful girl he loved in his arms as she lowered herself over him with a soft sigh. She was perfect. And he was fucked.


	6. Chapter 6

SATURDAY: THE SMALL, DARK HOURS:

Gods she was a mess! A sweaty, writhing, panting mess and she had never ever felt more free and beautiful as she did in that moment. Her legs her shaking from the effort but it didn’t matter. Not with his eyes on her. Not with his hands stroking and tracing and dare she think it - worshipping her! Not with his cock thrusting deep inside of her and rubbing on things that she didn’t even know were there. She whimpered softly and whined against his lips as he pressed another kiss to hers, dragging her close again. She had asked him to actually ‘make love to her’ and she just kind of meant that he act that fantasy out for her, kind of. But he was VERY convincing. “Jaime.” She was so wound up, she could feel so much. It had NEVER been like this for her. “Shh sweetheart. I’ve got you.” She let out a cry and held herself down, rolling and rocking and clinging to him tight with her arms around his neck and her lips on the smooth warm skin of his broad, strong shoulder, peppering kisses there and up his neck and back again. “Please Jaime? Please?” She almost cried as he thrust up at her begging, even though he was as deep as could be with her grinding down and keeping him inside. Her whole body was wracked with tension, like she was hanging over a cliff with a frayed rope and the rope was snapping, one single fibre at a time and she was waiting for it to give so she could fly. “You feel so good Sansa. Warm and soft and snug. I never want this to end.” And his husky, exhausted voice was like a sword lancing the last of the rope. She cried out into his skin as her body exploded over and around his with blinding pleasures unlike anything she had ever known. Not even when he put his mouth on her just beforehand. And she could have almost sworn she heard him call her his love when he followed and grunted, pulsing deep - DEEP inside of her.

She started awake, fuzzy and confused and so warm and languid. And then she froze. It hadn’t been an elaborate and detailed dream apparently. Not if the hard wall of warm skin over very pronounced muscles and soft, crinkling hairs under her face were any real indication. Or the soreness and icky mess of some dried fluids between her thighs where there was a hard thigh pressed rather intimately and very naked. She had been.... VERY vocal in.... Oh by the Gods! She had been.... But Jaime hadn’t objected at all. If anything, he had been as desperate as she had! And he had even agreed to all she asked, including actually.... Gods - they had made love like they actually were in love and it was their first time together! It was even more than anything she could have possibly fantasised it to be. But it WAS ultimately, drunken sex with someone NEITHER of them should have been having drunken sex with. It could NEVER go anywhere. Even if he was kind of perfect in every way.... That she could imagine after only a few days of knowing this side of him. It was almost heart breaking actually. He could be someone truly special. Except that he could never be. They couldn’t ever be more. Maybe the weekend he had promised? But nothing beyond it. So now she had a choice? Hide herself away from him completely and pretend it was just the alcohol and ultimately it was a mistake? Or she could feign a confidence she didn’t have and act out her every fantasy with him and get those secret desires out of her system with someone who wouldn’t judge her for them. It wasn’t at all appropriate or proper or RIGHT. But it did feel exciting and GOOD. And maybe for once she should just let herself go a bit. His warm hand and arm hugged around her naked back and hip was a pretty clear sign that he’d maybe be alright with it, wasn’t it?

She blinked her heavy, scratchy eyes open slowly and noted the sky line with a soft smile and snuggled into him, tugging at her throw rug to tuck it up over her shoulder more. “Jaime?” She nudged him gently, smiling at the idea of showing him this. Sharing THIS. It was ridiculously romantic, made even more so by their being tangled together naked, but for the single shared blanket. Especially after making love as they had. But maybe it was right too. Maybe she would never get to share this with any man she ended up married to? Maybe she would have a handful of memories of a perfect, forbidden romance to get her through a life without actually knowing love as she had always dreamed of it. “Hi.” She smiled sheepishly and blushed hard, pushing her face into his chest a touch at the sound of his sleepy voice and the feel of his hand stroking her hip with sweet affection. “Look. Sunrise. Not only do you actually get to see the view after all? You get to see it at the best possible time.” She almost purred at the feel of his hand tracing up over her side and tucking around her to almost pat her hair. “I’m thinking that I’m getting to experience the single most perfect moment in time and it just happens to include a view of a beautiful sunrise to top it off.” She bit her lip against a pathetic little whimper. It truly was a perfect moment, and for the time being, she wanted to just let it be that, without all of the logical reasons why she should be freaking out. She wiggled slightly so that she was cuddled up closer to his face and cupped his neck in outright loving affection, cuddling her forehead into his jaw. And she wanted it to last forever. Especially when he turned just enough to press a soft kiss to her head before turning back to watch the sunrise over the soft grey morning mist and the calm flow of the green fork with her.

Her heart thudded hard in her chest as he tipped her face and leaned in to kiss her softly. It felt loving. Which was too wonderful. And too confusing. Like he instinctively understood that for what they had shared to be in this place, it would have to be so. It was bittersweet too. “I want to stay in this moment forever.” She gasped slightly at his low mumble and kissed him again, letting the feeling linger as the sun climbed up and shone in over them. She sighed softly and snuggled into him, letting him wrap her up in his strong arms and etching it into her mind forever. “Thank you.”   
“For what Sansa?” She smiled sheepishly and shook her head against him, soaking up the little intimacies. The way he was playing with her hair and holding her hand over his chest. “For making this special instead of the cheap drunken experience it could have been.” He sighed heavily and almost cuddled her to him quickly before resuming his little touches. “You deserve special rather than cheap Sansa. And it was technically still drunk sex that very likely shouldn’t have happened. We both know that. But I don’t regret it at all. And I’m kind of hoping you will agree to my offer of seeing to all of those lovely little fantasies you have for the rest of the weekend too. I meant what I said to though? I don’t want it to end.” She let out a shuddering breath at his soft, almost nervous and disappointed confessions. She wanted it to, but it really couldn’t ever be more and they needed to respect that so they didn’t end up being hurt or hurting those around them. “We would have to sneak around and I don’t want to ask you to have to do that again Jaime?” He tipped her chin and smiled almost sadly. He was so handsome it actually hurt to take him in looking so soft. “If this could be MORE, I wouldn’t appreciate sneaking around no. But... To have this weekend with you? I’m more than willing. I want whatever small window I can have with you. Is that alright?”

She sucked in a slow, deep breath and searched his eyes. Why, oh why did he have to be everything she wanted and everything she couldn’t have all at once. “I want that too... Too much. I need to step back a bit. So if we can maybe... There are bedrooms downstairs... I want last night and this morning kept apart kind of? This was special and it meant something and I can’t afford to-“ He pressed his fingers against her lips to hush her and nodded sadly. “But the rest needs to be great sex between friends that can be remembered as just that with no potentially painful strings attached because this can never be more than this weekend.” She closed her eyes sadly and nodded at his quiet words. It felt like they were breaking up. Which was ridiculous. But also necessary. She could easily fall in love with him and that would break her when it inevitably ended. “It’s alright baby. We do need to be able to walk away. I know. And this? This will be that one perfect moment in time.” She smiled sadly and nodded, happy that he understood. And both a little confused and maybe even a touch hurt by the pained sadness he was displaying. Surely he wasn’t affected in that same way? She kind of figured that he was just putting in so much effort to be nice. To give her that special moment that no one else had ever bothered with. She hadn’t even been sure he was serious about wanting her the night before until she had daringly ask if she actually could call him... THAT. And then she was pretty sure he did actually want to have sex, but it was mostly the work of the alcohol too. She was confused and actually? She didn’t know what she thought at all. Only that she wanted him but didn’t want to get attached knowing she couldn’t keep him. And it felt like he wanted the same.

She woke again sometime later, the sun a good bit higher in the sky, and very much alone, though tucked up warm, with the blanket wrapped around her and still very, very naked. She stretched slightly and smiled in confusion and in delight as her eyes fell on the glass of water, little white tablets and note on the table before her. She felt far worse than she had when she woke initially at sunrise, very likely still a little buzzed, not exactly DRUNK still, but not fully sober either. And she supposed Jaime must have been the same, if he had taken the time to hunt out the aspirin she kept in the small bathroom cabinet. It was very sweet of him to place some there for her too. And to leave a note. At least she hoped it was. Perhaps he had snuck out and left a note to say he wasn’t interested in anything more and it was all a really big mistake. And whilst she would agree that it was reckless and stupid of them? She didn’t feel like it was a mistake. And perhaps that’s what actually made it an even bigger mistake. 

She groaned at her muddled brain and reached out to snag the aspirin and water, sitting slightly to swallow both down quickly. Relishing the wetness on her tongue and the flushing of the disgusting taste in her mouth somewhat. And then she gingerly lifted the note, steeling herself against what it could say. What it really probably SHOULD say and what she desperately hoped it didn’t say.

Red,

Sorry I’m taking the cowards way out a bit here. I did not want to leave you and I also didn’t want to wake you. Unfortunately, it occurred to me that whilst those potentially looking for you might assume you either slept here or come up early? Anyone looking for me would realise I hadn’t slept in my room. If we were both missing all morning? I’m sure you understand where I’m going with this. Anyway, I actually just put my number in your phone and sent myself yours when I did. You really should add a pin lock by the way. I don’t know what or how you want to continue with anything, or if you still do, so I figured that it’s a safer bet for you to text me when you figure it out or whatever. Last night was incredible. YOU are incredible. If that is all it was? I hope you understand that. And I want you to know that I am fully aware, unlike those who won’t be named - that you are, and last night was, far more than I have ever deserved and I will NEVER know better. A little confidence goes a LONG WAY Baby.

J.

She cuddled back down into the recliner, burrowing into her blanket, note in hand. The way he called her baby... She swallowed that fluttering in her chest down hard. Refusing to allow her heart to get carried away again. It would be a definite risk to go ahead and spend the rest of the weekend sneaking around with him. But she had resolved herself to taking time for herself to heal properly before thinking on wanting to search for that one person who would be her match. Senselessly dating or sleeping around had never been of interest to her either. But being with Jaime hadn’t felt like that either. They both knew it couldn’t grow to be what they both craved for themselves. Perhaps their understanding and respecting that absolute, would allow them to act as a bit of a healing balm for one another. Maybe that was the point of short, seemingly meaningless affairs? She had always dreamed of having a great love and knowing only them, giving them every part of her heart, body and soul. But her fairytales weren’t real from what she understood. Perhaps Jaime was that for her, the fairytale that she couldn’t have forever, that would help her naive heart to accept reality. Help teach her what she actually deserved and what to accept nothing less than. And if no one ever measured up in reality? She’d always have the memories she made with him too. She reached out and snagged her nearly dead phone quickly and flicked it open.

TEXT TO J:

You are incredible too. I have baking I needs do today. I know that my siblings aren’t letting me get away with it. But I can get away with disappearing this afternoon? And my falling asleep up here isn’t exactly unheard of. It would likely be expected to a certain amount this particular weekend?

TEXT FROM J:

You haven’t moved have you? Tonight? Possibly this afternoon too? I’m at your service My Lady.

TEXT TO J:

I have not. So Gallant, Ser Jaime!

TEXT FROM J:

Really regretting locking myself out now that my presence has been noted and wouldn’t be missed again for a time. How’s that for a twist on a fairytale! I left my sleeping beauty, hungover, Well ravished and gloriously naked, and locked her in her tower with the damned key!

TEXT TO J:

Well I would have a few questions and concerns if you were locking her up in her tower in such a state if you KEPT THE KEY SER!

TEXT FROM J:

With good reason I should think! Speaking of possessive type behaviour? Check for love bites beautiful. I will have to wear a shirt for the remainder of the weekend myself. If I’m lucky, Tyrion won’t notice that I am doing so.

TEXT TO J:

I didn’t? I’m sorry!

TEXT FROM J:

Don’t apologise Sansa. Under different circumstances I’d wear all of your marks rather proudly. But I can’t really explain away the scratches across my shoulders and upper back when I ‘passed out outside and woke up just before dawn’ again! Lucky I have long hair too or I’d be forced to act like a teenager and find makeup for the little bruise on my neck! My naughty wolf!

TEXT TO J:

Why did you ‘pass out outside’? 

TEXT FROM J:

Your changing the subject wasn’t subtle at all Red. But I’ll let it slide this once... I passed out because Tyrion absolutely noticed I hadn’t slept in my room. Thank God I had a wash before I went down because he was sitting on my bed waiting for me. Told him I woke up and didn’t want to make too much noise and risk waking anyone with a hangover, and I was wide awake so went for a walk along the river instead. We should probably be careful around him just in case. 

TEXT TO J:

He wouldn’t say anything if he caught us would he?

TEXT FROM J:

No Red, he wouldn’t say anything. But he would likely encourage us to make it more, ignoring all of the very real reasons we shouldn’t.

TEXT TO J:

I don’t know if that makes me feel better or worse actually?

TEXT FROM J:

Don’t worry over it baby. My texting is being noticed though. Save me some cookies? It’s not worth the risk to my fingers to come between Arya and your baked goods I don’t imagine? It might have been years, but I remember that well enough!

TEXT TO J:

I always stash the best ones in The Tower Jaime. And your survival instinct is on point. Find a reason to come in when I’m working and you can have fresh, warm ones? Just don’t tell anybody I let you get away with it!

TEXT FROM J:

Open invite to your Tower, still warm cookies? I’m beginning to hate that I’m an old man that your parents aren’t particularly fond of AND that I’m related to a crazy person who kind of wants you to die! 

TEXT TO J:

It’s more complicated than that J.

TEXT FROM J:

I know. Come down before I begin contemplating the logistics of scaling tower walls.

TEXT TO J:

Shall I tempt you with artsy photos of me taking in the view from where I’m standing, in nothing but my blanket?

TEXT FROM J:

WOMAN! 

TEXT TO J:

I saw you look up! 

TEXT FROM J:

I am going to slap that ass until it’s as red as your hair naughty girl! - You ARE good with spanking?

TEXT TO J:  
PHOTO ATTACHED.

Only when I’ve been very naughty Daddy. I’m off to shower and my phones dying. I’ll be down soon.

TEXT FROM J:

It’s very naughty to tease Daddy, Baby girl. - That photo is beautiful and so are you.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is actually a bit all over the place and dialogue heavy too. Hopefully it works for everyone else as it does me.
> 
> Tyrion and Arya the voices of hilariously insulting reason!

SATURDAY:

“So... How is Sansa?” Jaime froze, his eyes determinedly staying on the simply stunning photo on his phone. It depicted her exactly as he saw her. A soft, ethereal being, just beyond reach, lost in the beauty of imagination. He was contemplating if he could get away with having it printed and framed when he got home. No one but him would know it was her, it looks too artsy to be a snap shot of an actual real life moment. She was at the window, looking out at the view, to the left of frame, wrapped in her throw rug with her hair hanging low behind her and her legs and a single shoulder, arm and sliver of her side bare. The large window and a little of the view taking up the majority of it. Clearly she had set the timer on her phone and propped it on the table. SHE was the focal point and only he or one of the Starks would recognise both her and the location easily. He had taken others as she slept on him this morning. A little creepy perhaps, but he found it sweet actually. If she was his, he had no doubt in his mind that she would find it romantic too. “Freezing up and pretending I didn’t ask or that you didn’t hear me correctly isn’t helping you hide it big brother. Walk with me.” 

He groaned in frustration and locked his phone to slip it away in his pocket, shoving his free hand into his hair and glaring at his smirking brother harshly. At least he could be thankful that the fool was VERY hungover, as evidenced by his bloodshot eyes. Even his far too amused and puffed up pride-filled chest couldn’t hide the fact that he was suffering. Oddly, his own hangover had been cheekily sorted when Catelyn pushed a glass of some strange fizzy concoction across the counter to him when he was pouring coffee for himself. He had no idea why she had done such a thing, but he kind of wanted to fall at her feet and offer up all of the Gold in Casterly Mines for whatever magic she had pulled on him! So at least he had that. He also did have a bit of warning he supposed. He KNEW the little shit had taken note of his interest. And his presence in his bedroom before he got back there himself fairly well sealed it for him. But still. He had hoped for Sansa’s sake, that he hadn’t actually noticed it. “You might try to be less obvious if you mean to keep it quiet Jai.” He huffed in annoyance and looked around himself casually, before strolling almost lazily towards the tree line in a bid to keep their words private.

“You can’t say anything to anyone. Especially not her.” His brother scoffed at him and shoved his hands in his pockets beside him, almost skipping along as he did so. And he didn’t really need to speak to know exactly where his brothers mind was going. “Don’t bother.”  
“Don’t bother what?” He rolled his eyes and showed his displeasure clearly. He couldn’t afford to have hope of it being more. “Don’t act like its the best news ever. Don’t waste time letting that brilliant mind tick over all the ways it can help ease the messy path. It’s too complicated, too risky. And... She doesn’t want it to be more Ty.... What was it that actually gave me away?” His brother groaned dramatically and flopped down on the grass in a small clearing, where they could see the water and the back lawns of the manor clearly through the trees. He dropped down beside him and propped himself against a tree. “You being here whilst Cers is here was the first sign, along with your ears pricking every time her name gets mentioned. How long Jaime?” He snorted rudely and closed his eyes in defeat. He was beaten before he even tried to hide the actions he hadn’t expected to be taking OR HIDING.

“I noticed her at the wedding. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I hadn’t even fucking talk to her then Ty! It’s so fucked up! I added her on social media after that - not that I’m terribly present on it myself... But I convinced myself it wasn’t really creepy to do so - I already had all of her siblings on that anyway... The more I’m around her now, the more I KNOW her, the worse it gets and yet I can’t stop it. I don’t want to.” His brother whistled quietly and stared at him in outright shock before letting a slow grin form. “Don’t.”  
“Why the fuck not!” He groaned again and dropped his head back to stare up at the trees. It was even fucking worse than he expected. “Because I’m having a hard enough time accepting that this is all it will be and I am desperately avoiding giving voice to nonexistent hope without you stepping in and giving it a fucking voice is why!” It hurt enough. He didn’t need to say that though. “Jaime? Why do you think there’s no hope? I assume you slept with her - last night at least, if not before that, and that stupid face you were pulling at your phone just before told me exactly who you were texting. You had her blanket around your shoulders yesterday morning too? She’s less obvious about it, but clearly she wants you too?” He snorted rudely and tilted his head to look at his brothers utterly confounded face. It was more than obvious that he didn’t understand. “You’re in love with her.” It wasn’t a question and it certainly didn’t need a verbal answer. “You really think I would risk getting caught having an affair with her if I wasn’t?” Alright, apparently it needed a LITTLE voicing. “More to the point, do you think I would do that to her after everything she has been through? I wasn’t going to do anything... She took me up into the tower and told me about everything Ty. The assholes that have treated her like she’s.... Starting with Joff. I needed her to know what it felt like to actually be cared for. And now I’m utterly fucked because it can’t be more.”

“WHY? I get that there are complications. Cersei and... Your age and possibly Ned and Cat? Cella... But Jaime, you BOTH deserve it.” He rolled his eyes and grimaced, remembering how it felt to wake to her at sunrise, how soft and beautiful she had been. How utterly RIGHT it felt. And then how much it hurt to basically have her break his heart. Then and there. There was pain in her eyes and in her voice for saying that anything else needed to be more distanced. But she had said it and he had agreed - to appease her. AND he knew it was true, even if he hated it. “Even if there was a way around those things Ty? Which I really don’t think there is without causing a lot of pain to others we both love? .... She still blames herself for all of the bullshit that is still being felt from Joffs carry on and his death. It’s been years and still things aren’t as they once were here. It’s too much to risk when she isn’t in the same place I am. I don’t want to break her because she feels stuck committing herself to me, because of all the drama we would cause initially trying to be together. And conversely, if it didn’t work out in the long run? The damage would be too much. It MIGHT be - and I say MIGHT very loosely, different if she felt the same way. But she’s looking at me like a friend who is willing to love her for a small amount of time to help her heal and teach her her worth I think, so that’s all it can be.” He ignored his brothers quiet muttering and extravagant gestures of frustration and let himself feel the pain that that realisation caused. The pain and the acceptance. Voicing it helped. He understood that it could only be what she asked for these few days. And pushing in anyway would scare her away completely and do the damage they were trying to avoid. And there was the biggest issue of all yet to be voiced. He wouldn’t give it, and he hoped she never had to know it. He’d feel like he had to tell her if she gave him the chance and it would break her completely and him too when she left him. Not even Sansa was so infinitely good, that she could accept his past completely. At least he didn’t think?

“So you shared a drunken deep and meaningful conversation, she took you somewhere that I truly thought was actually just a family joke for her enjoying time alone, and then what? You had sex? All night or did you fall asleep with her too? Have you ever stayed to actually sleep with a lover before?” He breathed in an exasperated breath. His brothers need to know EVERYTHING was grating on his last nerve and those were already fried completely. “I thought her tower was just a joke too. Something Jon started remember? But no. It is actually a real place. And you don’t know it, but he left his own personal suites here to her.” 

“You’ve seen the inside of the elusive window room!” He chuckled darkly at his brother scandalised and dramatically awed voice. “THATS her TOWER!” He shot him a cocky smirk and waited until he stopped with his ridiculous childlike wonder. It wasn’t ONLY Lady Sansa who liked the romance of tales and the wonder of magic as a child. “Mmm. You can’t know any of it Ty. It’s... Important to her. And it’s important that it’s kept private.” He didn’t like the curious gleam in his idiot brothers cocky eyes. “She took you into her inner sanctum. Her... Place of peace that is hers alone or whatever? AND had sex with you there and you don’t think she feels the same way or has the potential to and maybe hasn’t yet realised it?” He cursed quietly and rolled his eyes heavenward again. “Which is WHY it wasn’t merely sex or a drunken fuck Tyrion. I swear to the Gods if you don’t let it rest and stop meddling? I’m tossing you in the river.”

“You MADE LOVE TO HER IN HER SACRED PLACE AND YOU DONT THINK IT CAN BE EVERYTHING FOR YOU BOTH? ARE YOU STUPID?” He growled low and shot his brother a final warning look. He had had enough. He couldn’t handle the way he kept dangling hope and even desperate approval. “You’re an idiot and so is she. But FINE! I’ll butt out. And cover for you while the two of you fall desperately in love and act like it is nothing more than a tragic love affair destined to end before it can be torn apart and end in utter destructive devastation. Just remember Jai, you gave far more for someone both much more dangerous to your world and far less worthy of your devotion for far too long. Yet you aren’t even willing to TRY when I believe it CAN be EVERYTHING. Think on that.” 

He didn’t bother to say anything more. He simply stood up and walked away slowly. His brother had a point. But it didn’t matter. What mattered was that he was going to follow through with what he had offered. He would be her friend and confidante if and when she wanted that, and he would willingly sneak around with her this weekend. He would fuck her every possible way she could think to test the limits of her sexual fantasies and to relieve her fears and frustrations over intimacy. And then he would bid her a very fond farewell. Just like she wanted. Of course he would never get over her and he would likely never move on either. But he had already been determined to remain a Batchelor for the rest of his days anyway. Myrcella would be named his heir apparent probably, and Ty would take over the companies eventually because he was a soldier not a businessman and even his Father had come to accept that. He would take The Rock and make sure it stayed in Lannister hands, but he didn’t need a wife and kids for that. And he’d be alright with his memories of the small moment in time that he had something so very special.

——————

“Hey Lannister! The Runts got some new gear she wants to show off, one of the new Braavosi imports we were talking about! We’re heading to the range over Darry if you’re interested?” Jaime paused in his step back across the rear lawn and cocked a very curious brow at the pair of grinning wolves. But for the fact that he knew Jon was Lyannas son not Neds, he could believe that he and Arya could have been twins for how alike they were. “It’s left handed.” And he was sold. The cheeky little bitch knew exactly what would get him to agree more than anything else when she let the sing-songing taunt fall from her mouth. He fucking hated not being able to show everyone around him up anymore! Sure he could line up and use a tripod to relieve the weight like was common practice for stationary positions, but he just couldn’t trust his hand for even that anymore.

He could not fault their timing at all either. It was perfect actually. Nothing cleared his head like focusing himself on nothing else but what he could see from hundreds of feet away. Not even close range or hand to hand could give him that. Of course he wouldn’t have his own rifle, he had had to retire his old faithful, and his newer model, like Aryas, set up for his left, was not often brought out. Most people simply assumed he gave up rifles all together when he was injured. But he could maybe prove that he still had it with testing out the Runts new toy. 

“Your trucks not out front Jon? You got full lock boxes for them?” Jon shook his head and grinned knowingly. “Nah we came in Ygs car. Running Bags. Rec weapons only Lord Commander.” He grunted in annoyance and narrowed his eyes. “What about you Squirt? What’s your lock up situation?” She blinked at him stupidly and cocked her head in question. “Standard lock up bags that’s the legal requirement for travel unless you are dealing with full service weapons not on your person directly right? I always run bags on the road?” He ground his jaw hard and growled low in his throat. He had been pushing for changes to those fucking laws. Granted it was HARD to become licensed outside of law enforcement or the military, and the licensing was specific to needs. But without appropriate lock up laws, any nut job could potentially get their hands on a weapon that could kill or maim with a twitch of a finger. He shuddered to think what would happen were his sister to snap and have access to a high powered rifle. She and Joffrey once upon a time were exactly why he was so adamant about appropriate storage of weapons. “I’ll get my keys, one of my crates is empty so you can both use it AND if you aren’t storing in a military grade locker here at the manor? They can stay there when not in use, until you head out again.” Jon bowed his head in a single nod whilst Arya blinked in confusion. “Alright. But just so we’re clear Lannister? I don’t work for you. Actually? Are you even Jon’s supervisor now?”  
“He’s everyone’s supervisor now Arry. Lord Commander of Special Forces, Weapons and Tactical. He’s Charlie and we are his angels. ALL teams, not just the few he handled as Field Commander.” He snorted rudely and eyed the idiot up and down with a smirk. “I must have been a real prick in a previous life to get stuck with you lot as my ‘angels’! Seven hells. Gear up, my truck will seat seven provided two are small frames and we aren’t overloaded with gear, I don’t have my roof pods on. But all weapons get locked in mine, even if we have to taken a second vehicle. I’ve got a few things to check and I’ve got to grab the keys. I’ll meet you out front in a bit?”  
“You have your personal truck kitted out like a tactical vehicle?” He smirked in amusement at the girl. Clearly she hadn’t ever really comprehended what his position entailed and entitled him. “Lord Commander Arya. My personal truck IS my tactical truck. Of course I have a rather impressive collection of personal cars, I am a Lannister after all. but I’m used to my truck.”  
“Can I drive?”  
“Absolutely not.”

He slipped into the kitchen quickly, thanking what ever false bloody deity that was responsible for his finding his girl looking so fresh and soft from the shower, all on her own as she leaned into the counter and sipped at her coffee. Of course he couldn’t exactly make it too obvious that he was there to let her know he would be gone probably the entire day. He wasn’t even sure she would actually need him to tell her what he was doing. But he didn’t want to risk upsetting her by not giving her the heads up that any afternoon activities were probably now off the cards. He slipped past her and poured himself a cup from the still hot coffee pot quickly and turned his eyes to the window, almost paranoid that someone would notice his strange proximity to her. More than a little awkward, given how confused and upset he had been only moments before her siblings cornered him. “You do know that you are now taking all of my siblings with you but for me and MAYBE Bran right?” He grinned at her in amusement and turned to lean his hip into the counter beside her, resting his hand close enough so her could tickle her side with his fingers stretched out. “Less competition for baked goods. Now you can stash as much away as you like and they will never know you’ve done so. AND you can share it with me!” She huffed a soft laugh into her mug and looked up at him from below her lashes. “Well? It’ll save explaining why I’m not out swimming or boating with them at all today.” He cocked a brow in question and waited, slightly amused by her teasing tone. “My bikini isn’t going to hide the stubble burn and bite marks on my thighs and around my chest. Not even my one piece will, or the clothes I might normally wear over my swimsuit when out on the water for those activities. I don’t really need to explain my not being out there.... I just wanted to tease you.”

He didn’t even want to pretend to hide his pride and pleasure at hearing that he had marked her lovely skin. Though he did bemoan not seeing her out by the pool or the river in a bikini. He bemoaned not being able to see her all day too. But he needed space and distance. That’s why he had jumped at it. He had already deduced that. He let his smile drop and checked around quickly before stepping closer and rubbing his hand over her lower back slowly. “Ty did work everything out. But don’t let it worry you. He won’t say anything, hopefully not to you either. But just in case he does.” She grimaced slightly and then nodded with a soft sigh and a sad smile. “It’s not him I’m worried about anyway.” He sighed sadly and squeezed her hip. “Have a care with Cers today. Less people around for cover if they are all coming to the range... And... She was drinking heavier than a glass or two of wine last night, it’ll mess with her meds.”  
“I’ll hide the knives.” He groaned quietly, his heart tripping painfully at her inappropriate teasing. He didn’t want her to hide her sense of humour away from him completely, but hells! She didn’t understand fully why that wasn’t funny for him in particular, at all. “That’s not funny.... Just... Don’t kick people out if they are underfoot and driving you nuts while you are in here or whatever alright? She won’t say anything hopefully... Especially with others around. Don’t be alone with her if you can help it.” He rubbed circles on her hip slowly as she sighed heavily and shook her head. Clearly thinking on how wrong they were together considering what he had just said. “Hey?” She blinked up at him and he stole a quick kiss. Recklessly ignoring that anyone could walk in or look up at the right angle and see them through the window. “Don’t over think it. Just avoid her. Her issues are on her alone.”

“Jaime?”

“Seriously! The things you had to do was drink coffee! Is it hot at least?” He sighed dramatically at the firecracker that shoved past him to get to the coffee pot. Either she hadn’t seen how close they were or she was ignoring it. But the moment was lost between them all the same. “Coming shooting Sans?” She snorted a laugh and shook her head at her sister, stepping over to the sink and well away from him. “Ahh no. I’m baking today. Jaime was just trying to sweet talk his way into getting first dibs when you all get back.” The little one scoffed at him and shook her head, and he let his signature arrogant smirk fall into place to hide his awkward reaction. “Don’t even try it Lannister! First dibs are mine. It’s a standing lifetime agreement.” He chuckled darkly and finished off his coffee, setting his cup down with a small clack and stepping away with his hands up in a gesture of peace. “Hey! Worth a shot! I haven’t had Lady Sansas baked goods in years.” He grinned at her smug little look and put his hands up higher with a laugh as the little one narrowed her eyes dangerously and pointed at him. “Cut it out you smug shithead! It’s a low blow to turn on the charm for MY goodies! Come on! Keys LORD COMMANDER! Sannie! Love ya! Save me the best ones!” He bowed dramatically, stealing Sansa’s hand playfully, only to have Arya slap him away, making his girl laugh brightly and shake her head. As he darted out to avoid the tiny scary woman’s attack. 

———————

“Oi! Come here!” Jaime frowned in bafflement and strolled over towards the hissing woman child curiously. She was darting glances to the others silently, the others who were all engaged in target shooting well away from where they were standing. Other than that, she was giving him absolutely no clue as to what she was up to. And then she punched his chest and narrowed her eyes dangerously. “Be less fucking obvious about it idiot! It could have been anyone that walked into the kitchen! You’re just lucky it was me! And pop your collar - your hair isn’t hiding shit!” He groaned loudly and scrubbed a hand over his face. He couldn’t catch a fucking break apparently! And if everyone already knew? It was fucking done already. He HAD hoped that her completely normal chattering on the way to the range and lack of shooting him scathing looks meant she hadn’t noticed. Clearly he was wrong. “Who else knows?” She snorted rudely and stepped up to his side, watching him curiously. “Me and Yg and Ty. That’s it that I know of. But Mama doesn’t miss much and Dad wouldn’t say anything if he knew anyway. The only other one who might have noticed is Jon, but you know he doesn’t miss much either.” He cursed softly under his breath and bit down on the frustration and what was feeling very much like devastation as best he could. “Calm down. No one is going to say anything, because the second we do, she will run for The Wall. Under any other circumstances she would give someone like you everything. But with the things she’s dealt with and with your bitch sister AND her being so close with Cella? PLUS there’s the fact that your age difference might make her balk because of how it might reflect poorly and give off the wrong impression? It’s gunna take a lot of effort to get through to her and that’s on you buddy. Just be more careful that apparently you are supposed to be hiding the fact that you’re fucking my sister in her tower. And she IS acting like it can’t mean anything isn’t she?”

“Seven Hells! Is it THAT obvious?” She grinned impishly up at him, thoroughly enjoying his impending heart ache apparently. “Not to everyone. But you two have never been even friendly really. I get that that WOULD HAVE changed now regardless, because you’ve both changed so much. I didn’t actually KNOW until I saw your neck this morning though. Don’t worry, I didn’t see it till we were talking with Jon. The three of us have been waiting to see if it would actually happen. I AM curious over her letting you upstairs though.” He blew out a massive breath and studied her quietly. His heart in his fucking throat. It was almost calming to know someone other than his brother would not only accept it, but encourage it. It still wouldn’t matter long term. And he had absolutely no idea how the creepy little shithead was aware that he’d been in the tower though!

He had a strange warm feeling in his gut because of her words too. It felt oddly like the hope he was desperately trying to suppress. “That’s not why she showed me up there. Not for... That happened AFTER. We were just talking. Joffrey. Harry. I told her she had shit taste in men.” He had come out here with the intention of clearing his head, not talk to yet another person about his sleeping with Sansa Stark, apparently a lot less under the radar than he was meant to be doing so. - HE hadn’t even meant to actually act on his developing feelings for her! And now that he had, it was being scrutinised by everyone who wasn’t supposed to bloody know about it! It was utter madness. “Which is what’s curious. She’s never taken anyone up there. Our parents are allowed in to spend time with her doing things - she and Mama work on their sewing up there sometimes, and Dad is allowed in to read or work or whatever, if he wants something from there specifically or just wants to spent time with Sans and she is squirrelled away in there herself. But even we really only go up to let her know dinner is ready or whatever. Usually never for longer than maybe five minutes, because it feels a bit like we are intruding... She wouldn’t kick us out I don’t think? Not anymore. But it’s hers. Like her safe place I guess and she’s been dealt some pretty crappy hands over the years. She needs somewhere to relax her scary control levels. None of her friends have ever even been told about it. Harry wouldn’t even come here with her at all when they were together for her to maybe take him up there.... She TOOK YOU UP THERE LANNISTER. I KNOW SHE DID! Because she slept there last night, not in her room.... So look, I get that it would be complicated and maybe even dangerous with the evil queen and all. But she deserves someone who looks at her like you did in the kitchen.”

“I know she does. That doesn’t mean she wants that someone to be me and it doesn’t take away all that is at stake if it isn’t me she wants to look at her like that.” Arya Stark pursed her lips and studied him with an almost eerie sort of calm calculation before she nodded at him in understanding. “Alright. But maybe don’t rule it out entirely like you clearly mean to. Sure, it’s weird. But if it’s weird that leads to happy? Happy that leads to that kind of forever happy that she’s always dreamed of? Don’t let fear of complications or what ifs over it MAYBE not working out in the long run scare you off. I’d say that none of it matters if it’s just a bit of fun for you both - but I know you both. It’s not JUST that. No matter how you both might want to pretend. She doesn’t have secret, sexy affairs with older men - with ANY men! And you know enough of what she’s experienced to not hurt her by seducing her for something like that.” Jaime grimaced uncomfortably and rubbed at his sore hand, he shouldn’t do it. He really should just walk away, like he did with Tyrion earlier. He shouldn’t let any hope in at all. “And what if I’ve got skeletons in my closet that she can’t forgive? What if it all goes to shit and we do tear things apart again because of it? What if I fuck up and break her heart?” 

He didn’t actually look at her again. His heart was slamming in his chest. He wanted her to answer and he didn’t. He knew how close they were now. They might not have much in common, but they did love and understand each other now they were women grown. “Do you want my advice or do you want me to tell you that you’re right?”  
“Arya.” She mumbled a few choice curses under her breath, some of which had him flinching. Others simply impressed him and would have amused him if he didn’t feel so fucking sick to his stomach. It was ridiculous! He was in turmoil and he had only realised how he felt for certain the day before. He didn’t even KNOW where her mind was at on it. He had been convinced that she just needed a friend to lean on and trust. And a part of him felt a bit like he was taking advantage of her. ESPECIALLY when she had told him she needed to step back. He was sure she didn’t feel the same way, even if she did obviously, feel SOMETHING. It wasn’t the same. If it was it wouldn’t matter how they were together for this small window of time, maybe? He didn’t know! He was so confused. “The only one of ALL of us, who won’t come around in time, most of us by the way? Would accept it quickly. Once they realise the actual feelings involved! The only one who won’t is Cersei. And while, yes I do actually get that her very likely spazzing out over it is tragic because she is clearly not recovered completely from her breakdown? I think that this might be the one thing you not try to protect her from. It’s on her and her alone that she can’t see Sans for who she actually is. It might be weird for Cell for a while, I know you guys are close and she sees you a bit like a second dad and Sans is one of her best friends... But eventually? As long as you were actually both happy? And it WAS that kind of forever happy? She would understand.” He knew all of that. He did. But he also worried more about Cersei attacking her or lashing out with details that no one needed to know about. Just to spite them both. And she still didn’t address his true concerns, not that she would understand them anyway, but he WANTED her to tell him how so desperately.

“Carry on as you have been. If it’s just supposed to be a weekend affair? Let it be, and then take it slow. Be her friend. Show her what it could be. TELL her about any skeletons up front - after this weekend! Let her have this. She’s so Gods damned resilient. Unless you mean to abuse her in anyway? Which I just don’t believe you capable of? She would forgive or understand or whatever, so long as you were completely honest and proved you wouldn’t try to hide anything that could hurt her. She might need a bit of time to think on it or whatever. But she’d at least hear you. And as for breaking her heart? Don’t. It’d break yours too. I’m not blind. It’s pretty obvious that you’re in love with her, if you weren’t you’d have reacted differently to My confronting you.... THAT is how you do it. I’ll cover for you this weekend and I’ll have your back afterwards no matter what and she won’t know I know yet. But if you actually want to give it a real shot? Treat her like a skittish horse with one hand, and a honest and giving lover with the other. Be her KNIGHT idiot!” He smirked lightly and huffed a laugh, shaking his head at the reality of what had just happened. It was surreal. And his head was now more crowded than ever. “And if it ends badly and it screws everything up with the families?” She snorted a laugh and shoved him with her shoulder playfully. “She’s handling Cersei’s presence just fine. And I’m pretty sure Señora El Loco actually wants to call for her head or some such crazy shit! But at most? It’s been a bit awkward here and there. And for the Gods sake YOU are both adults Jaime. And Dad and Robert aren’t going to come to blows over it with you two like they did her and Joff. It would be fine and I don’t think it’ll matter. It’s pretty obvious who Lady Sansa’s knight was always meant to be. NOW it is anyway! She wasn’t made for little boys. Something everyone probably should have realised with her closeness with Uncle Jon. She’s too mature for green boys who aren’t ready to be serious, and too good for those that don’t see her properly. And you haven’t ever had any interest in anyone really, until now.” 

He couldn’t help but laugh a bit at her. He felt a lot lighter. Which was very fucking dangerous. But... She wasn’t afraid of upsetting him or angering him like Tyrion was. Even if he had snarled at her, he didn’t think she would have backed down. She meant for him to hear everything she had to say and the truth was, that she wouldn’t do so for anything other than what she thought was her sisters best interests. That was grounding. Arya Stark believed HE was WORTHY of her beautiful, untouchable sister. AND she was willing to admit it and potentially help him around any issues. Including Sansa’s own ‘skittishness’. It was humbling to say the least. And he needed... Distance and time to process before he actually made any decisions on how and what to do.

“Just how many insulting titles do you have for my sister?” The cheeky shit cackled happily. “HEY! She’s crazy, almost homicidal crazy at that. She was always a bitch Jaime. It’s just different for you now because she hates you too for whatever bullshit reason she’s brewed up in that misfiring head of hers. And to answer your question? I have a LOT! But I also have a lot of potential fuel for inspiration too! She’s a bit like a distant aunt for one thing, technically she is also my boyfriends stepmother - not that anyone really speaks on THAT! BUT that also kind of makes her my pseudo mother in law. ALL of those roles belong to the evil bitches in the tales Lannister! AND then there’s the fact that she has been known to scream that MY SISTER - the single most kind and giving and smart and sickeningly wonderful person to ever live, as that MURDEROUS LITTLE BITCH! Seemingly forgetting that she used to cry when we returned from hunting with dead rabbits, because we were cruel for killing them. I take great pride in my list of names for her, and don’t pretend they upset you either, I know you have hated her since her vitriol over your accident.” He barked a loud, dark laugh and nodded deftly. He didn’t particularly care what she called his sister, once upon a time he would have. But that time was long past. Plus he liked Arya, she was as wild as they come, but she still had a heart of gold inside of her. A lot like her kind, sweet, wonderful sister. “All very true and very valid reasons Squirt.” He paused and frowned at her slightly as he thought on how to explain it. “I don’t necessarily hate her Arya. She’s not just my sister, she’s my twin and we shared everything for so long... I hate who she has become. Something broke inside of her when Joffrey died and I can respect that too, her pain and grief. Just not her reaction to it. And her blind belief that he was as innocent as a teenager as he had been a baby. Call her whatever you want. I’m particularly fond of evil queen or evil stepmother - because she would HATE hearing that!”

She grinned impishly and shot a loving look to Roberts actual eldest son. The one the great oaf didn’t know about until he was married to his sister and had children with her. He had known about the daughter who refused to have anything to do with him, but Gendry had been a shock, dropped in their laps when his mother died. Not that Robert actually really acknowledged him anyway, Jon had organised for him to be raised with Mya under the solid care of The Royce family. All that Robert had ever conceded was paying their way and allowing them his name if they wanted it. The only time they ever interacted was during these weekends. But his brothers and Myrcella and Tommen all acknowledged and spent time with him and Mya both. His niece and nephew when their mother couldn’t find out about it of course. But the most Robert had ever really given the young man was his hearty approval when he found out he was dating Arya.

“He’d hate it too! But I actually think he hates it more when you call Robert his father. The rest of the family are his, but Robert is just Robert. Never Dad. To him Yohn is both his and Myas Dad. They only agreed to take the name because Stannis asked them to and Shireen begged.” He hummed in affirmation. He did know that. He might be the reclusive, arrogant Lannister brother. But he always knew what was going on around him. And as much as he disliked most of the Baratheons, being that his... Niece and Nephew loved them? He played as nice as he could. Most of them didn’t much like him either, most people didn’t. And he couldn’t care less about it either. 

He sighed heavily and met her eye. “Thank you Arya.”  
“Mmhmm. You’re welcome idiot.... Just TRY. And not that I believe you could or would, but if you DO hurt her? I will carve you into tiny pieces and feed you to the pack. Got it champ?” He barked a loud laugh and nodded, clapping her on the shoulder playfully as he did. “You’re a vicious little bitch Squirt. You give me a call if you ever get sick of playing at your ‘professional’ combat comps and want to play with the big boys.” She cackled maniacally and shook her head as she shoved him away. “You military lads aren’t ready for someone like me!”  
“I know! But hey? Brienne can’t carry the weight of gender equality in the forces on her own, those shoulders a broad and strong, but it takes a village or an army or something right?”  
“You’re an idiot! It take a village to raise a child! An army to create change! I think.... But it only takes one kickass woman to show men we can do it too! Brienne could change the world all on her own I reckon!”  
“Strong allies would make it easier on her.”  
“Maybe when I’m done dominating the world Lannister! Speaking of? Let me see if I can’t out shoot the greatest sharpshooter on record!”  
“Don’t get too cocky little pup! I may have a useless trigger finger now? But I’m not without my secrets!”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sorry. Not even a little bit. You have been warned.

SATURDAY NIGHT.

She barely had time to react at all before she was pressed hard between her quickly closed bedroom door and the solid, strong, unyielding body of her lover. His insistent hands roaming over the front of her body, hot, firm and VERY knowledgeable about where she would want them the most. His arms cradling her almost, as he pressed flush to her back and put his mouth on her too. Biting and sucking and licking at whatever sensitive patch of skin he could reach. And it was overwhelming to say the least. Intoxicating maybe? That his desire for her would be so strong, that he might become so animalistic and desperate that he had to have her where it was a risk that anyone could possibly hear them or work out what they had been up to with his being in her bedroom at all. How in all the Gods names the man could hit at the heart of her desires without even knowing all that she fantasied about, she would never know! But she didn’t care. He felt incredible against her, grabbing and rocking and feasting on her as though he wanted to devour her and couldn’t care less who might come to know of it. Of course THAT was the draw behind the fantasy wasn’t it? That forbidden and careless desperation. She had been worried when he had so recklessly kissed her earlier. Frustrated that he would do something so stupid as to kiss her where anyone could see. And yet it had been loaded with longing and a softness that she desperately wanted but knew, had to be left behind in her tower too. Which only confused her more. She was just grateful that Arya had somehow missed the underlying tensions.

“Did you miss me today Baby girl? Hmm? Daddy missed his sweet one.” She whimpered at the gravelled whisper pressed hard to her ear so only she might hear. He was too good at this. And she revelled in it. Despite her nerves making her tremble just as desperately as her anticipation of where he might take it and what he meant to show her. “Yes.” He bucked into her and rubbed the obvious bulge of his hardness against her ass. “What was that sweetheart?” She whined softly and wiggled against him. “I missed you while you were gone today Daddy. I was so lonely without you.” The rumbling purr he let out of his chest sent need lancing through her, helped along by his hand ducking under her skirt and shoving her panties aside to feel for himself how much she missed him. “So wet for me. Tell me true baby, did you touch yourself while I was away?” She shook her head and canted her hips towards his fingers. “Uh uh. Don’t be greedy. I will take care of you but you need to be patient AND quiet. We wouldn’t want everyone to know how desperately you want my cock inside of you would we?” She squeaked in shock at the electric shock his smacking her clit gave. She bit her lip and turned to blink at him with wide innocent eyes. 

He pushed his hand up and over her curves until his wet fingers were in front of her. “Suck.” Her eyes widened at his filthy order, but her legs trembled at the fire in his eyes as he waited to see if she would. She licked her lips quickly and then held his eye as her tongue found his slick fingers and wrapped around them to draw them into her mouth slowly. Following his orders like a good girl. It actually didn’t taste bad at all and provided she ignored the prude inside who wanted her to pull back and run away to preserve her dignity? It was HOT. The look of utter worship in his eyes was everything in that moment. He cleared his throat quietly and watched her mouth intently. “Good girl. I’m going to lift your dress, tuck your panties to the side and fuck you right here against this door sweetheart. And you are going to keep my fingers in that hot little mouth, just like that to keep you quiet. And then we are going to dinner. You are going to sit and eat with everyone like normal, with my come still inside you and slicking your thighs. Do you understand?”

She moaned softly, half whining. It was a filthy suggestion. Completely inappropriate and unladylike. Gods! That wouldn’t even be acceptable for the more promiscuous people she knew. But she nodded anyway. She had known for some time now that she had desires that horrified her in truth. They didn’t fit with her personality at all, and yet now that she had this once in a lifetime chance to let such things become a reality, with someone she could trust to not judge and to help her with them? She wasn’t even hesitating. She was letting her disgusting thoughts take shape, following blindly where this incredible man was taking her. It was almost like she was someone else entirely for and with him and it was exciting. 

She pulled away from his fingers with a pop and leaned into brush her lips against his. Showing him that the concern in his eyes, the worry that he had pushed too far, was unnecessary. “May I keep my panties this time Daddy? They would help to hold everything in better? It’ll be messy otherwise.” She pouted at him and waited, noting that his breathing was coming in pants even harsher than her own. He was every bit as lost as her. “You’re seriously going to do it?” She scrunched her nose at him in embarrassment and nodded slowly. She just hoped she wasn’t pushing him too far now. 

Jaime groaned and wrapped his hand tight around her throat and jaw and dived in with a harsh and desperately messy kiss that was almost awkward in its lack of finesse. And so perfect for the moment. His good hand working frantically between them to free himself. And then he was tilting her hips and shoving at her skirt and driving home inside of her HARD. “What you do to me my dirty girl. This is going to have to be quick love.” She nodded and then groaned pushing his hand back against her throat before he could think to take it away. He wanted her to suck his fingers but Gods his hand there was so much better. “Fuck Sansa.” He bent his knees a little and tilted her hips a touch further, bending and twisting her at an awkward angle, and held on tight, his arm sliding over her belly to take her weight for her as he slammed into her rough. Hard, fast. LOST. 

And they were LOUD. Not their ‘voices’ - that was kept near silent by her need to breath slowly and deeply around the firm hold of his hand. He hadn’t tightened it or given her cause to fear it. And in her mind she knew that he wouldn’t, AND couldn’t, it was his injured hand after all. But the firm pressure acted as a control to her breathing and it was... So sexy. He, on the other hand, was flexing his jaw to keep his mouth closed and breathing raggedly through his nose against her temple. But the slap and squelch of his body pistoning in and out of her and the door giving the occasional rattle when the hand she had pushed into the frame slipped a few times under the onslaught of her vigorous work out, were like thunder in the silent room and hopefully equally silent household wing around them.

She was so completely overcome by sensation that she barely noticed his hand loosened on her side and slipping down between her thighs, until he pinched her clit and she exploded. Gasping as her claws dug into his bum cheek where she had reached around to hold on and encourage him. He was barely a heartbeat behind her, almost silently roaring against her ear as he rutted hard up into her and pulsed inside of her twitching, almost violently squeezing parts. And then he was diving desperately into her mouth again, forcing her face around to meet his as he stroked at her neck gently with soothing fingers. It was a curious juxtaposition. His soothing and careful affections and his continued rough and needy hunger. She sighed softly and tilted her head as he loosened his hold and focused himself on kissing along her throat with almost soothingly gentle presses. Like he was trying to make better where she hurt. Except that she didn’t hurt at all. Not even in her very tender parts.

“Hells!” She giggled at his wincing and flinching as he slipped out and then she reached down to right her panties in a bid to SLOW the descent of their combined fluids. Apparently he was incredibly sensitive, just as she was. “I think I might actually need to change before dinner you know?” He hummed in quiet querie, but continue with his petting and kissing as he tucked himself away quickly. “Mmm. You’ll need to cover this a bit. Not sure how you explain away the red hand print on you throat beautiful.” She groaned slightly and scrunched her face, wiggling to cuddle against him as best she could. “I’ve got a shirt dress I can throw on with tights, the collar and my hair will hopefully be enough. And if I wear tights I can reason that I changed because I was cold. I can even go get my blanket to wrap around me too. I’ll be a bit over warm but... PLUS! The tights will better hide what I’m apparently not washing away yet.” 

She smiled happily to herself as he hummed in approval and turned her in his arms to hug her properly, moulding her around his wonderful body as he continued lavishing her neck with needy kisses. “Perfect. Plus the stubble rash might hide the hand print. You just need to have irritated the skin on your neck somehow instead.” She giggled at how pleased he sounded with himself and cuddled into his beautiful head a little, showing maybe a touch more affection than she should given everything. But she kind of needed it too. “How do you feel?” She hummed and pushed a hand into his hair to hold him where he was. Enjoying the feel of his slightly sweaty hair against her fingers - which was actually pretty weird, but she didn’t want to think on it. “Really good. Wonderful. A little bit like a deviant though. You liked it?”

“Sansa? You can feel how much I did. You’ll be WEARING the evidence of just how much I liked it all night. Don’t feel like a deviant for having passionate needs or kinks. I’m not going to apologise for my having them. You shouldn’t either. They don’t make you dirty or slutty or whatever! They make you human. They make you fucking incredible baby.” She sighed happily. He felt too good in her arms and in her heart and in her world. But she wanted to cling for just a few moments. “You don’t think there’s something wrong with me?” He pulled back and studied her face, tracing her features with reverent fingers. The way he looked at her. She wouldn’t think on it. Couldn’t think on it or see it for what it absolutely looked to be. “Trust me Red. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are beautiful and smart and kind and sweet and creative - you fucking BAKE Sansa! And make things! Clothes and blankets and... AND! Being a bit of a freak in bed is a very, very good thing.” She smiled sheepishly and turned her eyes to the small patch of chest left bare so she could avoid his eyes. Such impassioned words had an effect on her that she both wanted and didn’t with equal measure. They also had her blushing profusely and fighting off the pricking of tears. “We haven’t actually made it to a bed for you to say if I’m a FREAK there too Jaime.” Her lips twitched as he forced the laugh he wanted to let out, to rumble quietly between them. Still conscious of just where they were. And reminding her of there risky location too. “I’ll tie you to a bed if you aren’t careful cheeky thing.” 

She smirked wickedly and waggled her brows at him and then she stifled a shriek as he picked her up and spun around, his hand clapped over her mouth to muffle her as he dumped her on the bed and dropped down on top of her. “Maybe I’ll tie you up here and now hmm?” She giggled against his lips as he swooped in to lay smacking kisses to her lips and all over her face playfully. “You do realise I can’t possibly hope to CONTAIN certain things when you manhandle me? And now I really do have to change!” Jaime hummed happily, apparently pleased with himself and lifted up enough to tug her skirt up to look, making her flush and slap at his shoulder with a small squeal in her throat and a whispered reprimand. And then he shot that thousand watt smile at her and leaned in for a deep, toe curling kiss. “Don’t wash me off beautiful. I’ll see you down stairs hmm? The bed can wait until tonight.” She sighed softly and stole another soft kiss before flopping down and staring up at him. “Alright. Maybe you should head in to your room until everyone is asleep tonight? If your bed is messed in the morning at least if you say you just woke early, Tyrion might even believe you?” Jaime rolled his eyes and kissed her nose before rolling off of her and sitting up. “Tyrion will know that I didn’t sleep alone Sansa. But I can do that. I’ll let you know when I am heading up so you can let me in.” His demeanour changed so fast she almost wound up with whiplash. And then he smiled over his shoulder at her so falsely that her heart stuttered inside of her. Something she said clearly upset him. But she had no clue what or how and she certainly didn’t know how to fix it either. 

“I’m sorry.” She didn’t really understand why she was saying it. But it just kind of seemed like... She upset him and she didn’t want to chase away the teasing fun they had been having. All she had said was that he should probably make a point to hide his actions so they were less likely to get caught. And then it clicked. He hated hiding. She sat up quickly and leaned into his broad back gently, resting her chin on his shoulder. He smiled sadly at her and shook his head, lifting the hand she sat on his belly up and kissing her palm. “Don’t be. It’s a bit of a trigger reflex to sneaking around is all. I know you didn’t mean anything by it Red.” She sighed softly and nodded, pressing a return kiss to the broad muscle there. “In saying that! It was actually a timely reminder. I should go. Let you... Change but NOT clean up hmm?” She hummed quietly in amusement and nodded. “No washing you of me. Got it. But I do actually need to change and try to hide the marks on my neck at least. I’ll see you down stairs?”  
“You bet. My good girl.” She giggled at his cocky wink and the dramatic groan he let out as he stood. “Tonight?” He bent down and kissed the top of her head and then pulled away after she repeated him in agreement. And maybe her heart might have hurt a little as he slipped out the door without a glance back at her. But that was to be expected too. She didn’t know how to have ‘just a bit of a fling.’ So she wasn’t surprised that subconsciously she was clinging to him when she didn’t really want to, because she couldn’t want to. It didn’t matter if he was basically perfect.

——————

“Sansa? Sweetheart? What happened to your neck?” She winced uncomfortably and touched her raw, red neck gingerly. Jaime had rubbed at her far more than either of them had realised. In fact the hand print itself was still visible if you looked closely and knew what the shape of the very light bruising was! But the stubble burn, which she was absolutely certain he hadn’t meant to give to quite that extent was very tender. Though luckily it was mostly just a bit red to look at and the very light bruising was well hidden with her dark blue shirt buttoned high. And her blanket draped over her like a shawl. “Oh! It’s a bit of a rash. A reaction to something. I don’t know if I was maybe bitten by a few overzealous mosquitoes or mites or something? Or if there was something in the grass maybe? I noticed it when I was cleaning for dinner and because I noticed, it got a bit itchy. I’ve taken an antihistamine, but I was actually hoping no one would notice!” She panicked slightly at the way her mothers hand sort of flicked her hair, just like she intended to actually get a closer look, but she held back thankfully and patted her blanket down over her shoulder better instead. “If it doesn’t settle with that, I’ve some medicated creams that will help. Have you changed laundry detergents maybe? You have had your blanket on quite a bit too?”

She blinked in faux thought and cocked her head, hoping to all the Gods that she was not making herself too obvious. She hated lying. She was actually pretty well practiced at it after everything of course, but she certainly didn’t like lying to her mother. “No, but this one was left here too. Maybe it’s collected a bit of dust or something sitting upstairs and I didn’t notice?” Her mother nodded in determination and filched it off her shoulders quickly. “Find your other one. I’m washing this. Just in case.” She smiled sweetly and hugged her mother quickly in thanks and then stepped out on the back patio deck quickly, hoping to avoid her eyes further. And praying she didn’t see anything more being so close to her.

“Here she is! Lady Sansa! I feel like I’ve barely seen you? What happened?” She blushed heavily and smiled sheepishly as she hugged the younger Baratheon girl gently in greeting and pulled away to press at her raw skin delicately. She was going to kill Jaime! “Oh! I think it’s a bit of a reaction to something. I don’t know what though. Mama is washing my blanket just in case. I left it behind last time I was here and she thinks maybe it got a bit dusty or something? I have to get my other one back off Jaime, I know it’s alright because I brought it with me.” Myrcella frowned at her slightly and brushed gentle fingers over her neck. “It looks a bit bruised Sans? Were you scratching at it? Is it just your neck?” She smiled again sheepishly. Utterly horrified that it was actually Cell who was looking closely and very contrite over her lying and worrying them so too. But she forced herself to swallow it down and wave it off. “I was before, when it first came up, yes. It’s fine truly. It’ll settle with antihistamine. I have a few spots of it, but my neck is the worst. Mama is probably right about it being something on my blanket. I do wear it like a cape and I was doing so this afternoon.” Her friend hummed curiously and rubbed her arm in support. “Uncle Jaime has your other one?” She hummed innocently and took her friends hand and squeezed it gently. “I found him passed out on the dock the other morning and gave it to him so he didn’t freeze.”

“Oh that’s right! He had it at breakfast didn’t he! I was wondering about that! UNCLE JAIME!” The blonde girl beamed happily, clearly accepting her words easily. But she had also made a point of drawing his attention. And everyone else’s by yelling at him. Jaime whipped around and looked at his niece in curious question. “Do you still have Sansa’s blanket? Her other one has had to be washed because it’s got dust or something on it that has given her a rash?” Her face exploded in blooming colour as he blinked rapidly, trying desperately to look confused rather than highly amused, like she knew he wanted to. “I’ll go grab it. I actually forgot I hadn’t given it back! Sorry Sansa.” She nodded shyly and thanked him awkwardly, trying desperately to brush off everyone’s concern. And tamping down the desire to duck off back to her tower, so she wasn’t faced with everyone’s concern that was entirely unnecessary. Everyone’s but Tyrion, who was trying desperately not to smirk at her knowingly.

His heavy hands squeezed down on her shoulders as he draped the blanket over her gently. “Sorry about that! I sat it down on the dresser and forgot it was there. You alright? That looks pretty sore?” She pulled it tighter around her and smiled at him sweetly. “That’s alright. Thank you for getting it, it wasn’t necessary to do so immediately.” He squeezed her shoulders again and let her see his genuine concern quickly before shuttering it. “Really! I’m alright. I have sensitive skin. It’s just a bit irritated is all. Thank you for your concern, but I’ll be fine.” He smiled lightly in understanding and nodded, letting his hands drop away. 

“It’s not really! She’s bruised herself scratching and rubbing it Uncle Jaime.” She wanted the floor to open up and swallow her whole. And she wanted to kick him with equal measure. He cocked a brow at her and tilted her chin in concern that wasn’t entirely feigned. “Have you taken anything for the reaction?” She pushed his hand away kindly and nodded. Her blush, thankfully, would be expected with all the attention. “It should settle down pretty quickly then. She will be fine Cell. She’s a big girl, I’ve no doubt she can look after herself.” Her friend snorted rudely at her uncle and rolled her eyes. “Of course she can! But she doesn’t tend to worry enough over herself - so someone has to thank you very much!” Jaime huffed a laugh and hugged her into his side to lay a smacking kiss to her blonde head. “Little mother hen! You worry entirely too much Cell. Nothing a good whiskey or two won’t fix! Right Sansa?” She laughed softly and nodded. “Right. Thanks for worrying for me Celly, but it really is just a bit of a rash. It doesn’t even hurt. It’ll be gone by morning.”

By the time everyone had finished eating, once again around the fires, this time a smorgasbord Of salads and grilled meats and burgers that her father and Robert cooked up, she was more than a little grateful for the rash cover story. More and more with every uncomfortable pull of dried fluids snagging on her tights and in the fine hairs of her upper thighs and around her folds. The ‘rash explanation’ gave her an excuse to wiggle and fidget without anyone asking why. Instead she just had to deal with an annoying amount of guilt inducing concern. Though even that settled as the redness across her neck settled down. And she resolved to take advantage of the ridiculously oversized hot tub in the en-suite off what had once been her Aunt Lysas bedroom. She might even be tempted to go up sooner rather than later for exactly that and get some payback on Jaime by sending him photos, knowing he couldn’t possibly do anything about it until everyone else retired for the night. Which they wouldn’t for a time yet, because for most, it was actually the last night they would have together before heading back towards their individual homes after lunch. Her parents would stay until Monday, and some of her siblings too, plus anyone who didn’t need to get to work or school until Tuesday. A point which only served to remind her that she had twenty four hours at absolute most left with Jaime. And that was sobering.

TEXT TO J:

When are you heading out?

She bit her lip uncomfortably and tucked her blanket up higher around her ears, hiding her phone in her lap as best she could. She was huddled up in the corner of the swing with her legs slung over her sisters lap affectionately, but Arya wasn’t taking any notice of her quiet demeanour at all. Busy with snuggling against Gendry and laughing with everyone around them as she was. She didn’t even actually know where Jaime was, only that he had been lazing back in one of the big lawn chairs beside his father last she checked.

TEXT FROM J:

Curious that you would ask. I was just informed that apparently your father and mine have business to discuss. Father has to get back tomorrow to ready for Monday, but Ty was happy to stay the extra night and spend Monday hashing whatever it is out with your father once everyone leaves... I AM his ride home and I DO NOT need to be at work until Tuesday. BUT Jon will be heading back to KL Monday too, so really? It’s up to you if you want me to stay again?

She smiled impishly and searched him out from under her lashes quickly. Noting that he hadn’t moved, and was actually talking quietly with both of their fathers, Robert, Stannis and Tyrion.

TEXT FROM J:

I’m sorry about your neck. I didn’t mean to cause all of that. Is THAT why you’ve been so fidgety or is it maybe something else my naughty girl?

TEXT TO J:

Stay? I’m not ready for it to be done yet. And I still have to get my revenge! You know exactly what my problem is! It’s dry and catching on my tights!

TEXT FROM J:

Let me wash it off? I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for it to be done Sansa. I know that’s not how this is supposed to work, but it’s true all the same.

TEXT TO J:

I’ll go up shortly. Give me an hour and I’ll run us a bath upstairs?

TEXT FROM J:

Hells baby. I’ll let you know when I’m heading up Alright? And you let me know if you want anything fun brought up... ties of some description? A blindfold.... strawberries and whipped cream? And now I’m hard sitting next to my fucking father! AND YOURS!

TEXT TO J:

If you are staying an extra night now? We can sort such curious sounding supplies for tomorrow night? Naw my poor baby! Uncomfortable around family are we?

TEXT FROM J:

I see what you did there. But I’m not objecting if you want to call me your baby. Maybe it’s you who should punish me for being naughty tonight?

TEXT TO J:

I’m not going to move faster just because you are turning on that charm you know? But I will tell you that I may have stocked the kitchenette with cookies and hot chocolate supplies. Including a can of whipped cream I stole out of the main kitchen.

TEXT FROM J:

We should just run away together Sansa. I’m exceedingly rich? We could go anywhere in the world and be alone together forever.

TEXT TO J:

Don’t tease me so Lannister! I’m on my last drink. This itching is driving me insane. I kind of want to hit you for it!

TEXT FROM J:

Not at all my intention when I hoped you’d be stuck with a constant reminder of me between those long legs all night.

TEXT FROM TY:

Darling? You are both being too obvious and it’s drawing attention. He’s ignoring me, so I apologise for intruding. Nice sell on the stubble rash by the way. 

TEXT TO TY:

This is very awkward! Thank you I think? Is it weird if I ask you to cover for us a bit? It’s bad I know but... Well... 

TEXT TO J:

Stop ignoring Tyrion. I’m going up now, before my embarrassment gives me away. I’ll leave the doors unlocked, lock them on your way in and follow the open ones. 

TEXT FROM TY:

On the contrary! I think it wonderful. And I have your back, but I think there is only really one obstacle in truth and she’s crazy and an obstacle for everyone already. I have your back though regardless! You both deserve a bit of fun and freedom. I already know it can’t be more than this apparently. Have a care with both of your hearts is all I’ll say sweet girl. And now I am a dead dwarf from the look on his face.

TEXT FROM J:

IGNORE HIM. I’ll be up soon. Please don’t lock me out because my brother has a big mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The slowing of uploads is coming! That I am actually sorry for. I know how frustrating waiting can be when you’ve become used to regular updates.


	9. Chapter 9

LATE SATURDAY NIGHT.

He was exhausted. The lack of sleep and the mild hangover that was actually quickly dealt with that morning aside? The emotional and mental ping pong he was playing with himself had frayed his last nerve. He didn’t want to blame Sansa for any of his issues surrounding whatever the hells they were doing, but her back and forth wasn’t helping either. Nor were their meddling siblings. He was overthinking it. Maybe she was too. But that was probably to be expected too. He knew how to have clandestine, tragic, love affairs of course, and he knew how to have benefits with friends. But he had no clue how to have both, especially with someone who didn’t know how to have either. And whilst he wanted space to sort his head out? He only had this last night with her. Maybe another if she didn’t change her mind or potentially balk if someone questioned his decision to stick around so his brother could meet with her father, being that there was a perfectly acceptable way for him to get home again without Jaime being forced to wait that extra day. 

Space to sort his head out could wait until he was home and back to normal and not around the temptress herself. He wasn’t going to waste what little time he had with her, trying to figure out what he had with her. He had given her her requested hour, and he had stopped off in his own room to mess the bed a bit, as ridiculous as he had found it. He had also had a quick shave, because he felt terrible over the mess he had made of her neck, and grabbed a change of clothes. Mostly he did it to give himself time to calm down. He had quelled his brother with a look, but he knew he wasn’t the only one watching them either. And he didn’t want her to know how tangled it all had him. He wanted her focused on their shared pleasures. On her fantasies, that she didn’t even realise, fed directly into his own. He hadn’t even realised just how much, until she pushed his hand back down over her throat earlier in the evening. THAT he hadn’t expected, had never actually been allowed to do - not even with Cersei, and he fucking loved it. Both the control and power it gave him and the trust she had in him to allow it. 

He found her lounging back in what had to be one of the most ridiculously ostentatious baths he had ever seen. Being that he was a Lannister, that said QUITE a bit! But it’s saying quite a bit, also told him exactly who had had design freedom over the suite of rooms he was currently in.

She was beautiful. Lazing back with her head propped on the lip, one arm balanced along it also, the fingers of her other hand trailing in the water and bubbles. The waves of fire that made up her glorious hair piled on top of her head in a messy knot. Her toes peeking out every now and again as she half floated, and bubbles floating along the surface of the water allowing only the barest, tantalising glimpse of her ridiculous body. He leaned into the frame and simply took her in. His change of clothes had been dropped on the bed on his way in, so he crossed his arms and enjoyed the simple pleasure of seeing her so relaxed.

“Are you just going to stand there and watch me?” He smiled widely and met her barely cracked eyes, absolutely loving the fact that she seemed to have realised rather quickly that she had no need to hide herself from him in anyway. He loved the confidence she exuded when they were alone. “I was thinking about it. It’s quite the view Red.” She rolled her eyes and turned her face slightly to look at him more fully, and then she held her hand out and wiggled her fingers in invitation and he was far too weak to deny her. He wasn’t even a little bit ashamed of that fact. 

He stripped quickly and strolled towards her lazily, VERY pleased by the way her eyes tracked the flexing of his muscles. ALL of his muscled form. He leaned down and kissed her deeply. He loved kissing her like that. He loved that she tended to follow his lead, even in kissing. If he wanted sweet pecks, she gave them. If he wanted messy, hungry feasting, she devoured him in return. And if he wanted to tease her and taste everything he could reach and dance and roll his tongue and lips with hers, she gave and took to match him. He could lose days simply getting lost in her kisses. 

He kept kissing her as he balanced himself with a hand on the rim and climbed into the warm water with her, positioning himself carefully so he didn’t slip and land on her ungraciously. And then he sat, lowering himself down to straddle her creamy thighs and slipping his hands along the rim until he found her neck and jaw to descend over her silky soft skin until her cupped and weighed her perfect, perky tits reverently, thumbing at her pebbled nipples and swallowing her moans. This was what he needed. No thinking. No talking. Just communicating through touch and action. And with that thought his mouth followed until he had one of her perfect pink peaks in his mouth where it belonged. “Mmm Jaime.” His name from her lips was like a drug and he was hooked, he guided one of her hands to his cock and let her go. Not bothering with words. He was determined to bring her off with nipple play alone, and he had a sneaking suspicion, that if sucking his cock could arouse her, jerking him off with free range to do as she pleased might just have the same effect.

And then he changed tactics. Smirking wickedly to himself against the flesh of her beautiful breast. He had underestimated her slightly, perhaps it was simply that he underestimated his desire for her and her innocence mixing with her enthusiasm so beautifully. He shuffled them around and pushed his knees between hers, settling down propping her legs over his spread thighs. He had been half hard basically since he left her in her room earlier. That one hard, magnificent fuck should have been enough to sate him for the rest of his life. Except that thinking on it was enough to have him stirring again and again. And then his having to wait despite how hard he had become sitting by the fire had set him on edge. 

He licked a wet stripe up between her tits and up her sore throat, pausing to pressing soothing, apologetic kisses to the now much less irritated skin. And then he stole a tiny, barely there peck. “Don’t move. You can use your hands on my body but not your own and no squirming. For every buck of your hips? I’m going to count and whatever number I get to, is how many times I’m going to spank that beautiful ass of yours, got it?” She whimpered deliciously and rubbed her hands over his shoulders, pouting so prettily. “But I need more Daddy!” He hummed negatively and tapped her nose. “No you don’t baby. You need to do as you’re told and for now I’m telling you, you need to stay still but for your hands on MY body.” He leaned in and bit her protruding lip a little and then licked it to soothe the sting. “Can you be a good girl for Daddy?” She pouted again and he raised a brow in challenge, and waited until she gave a petulant little nod and huffed. “Give me a kiss.” She leaned in and gave a single smacking peck and fell back in a snit making him chuckle darkly. “Put the attitude away sweetheart. Or I won’t let you come at all.” Her eyes widened slightly, as did her already blown pupils. She was so fucking perfect at this little game. “I’ll be good Daddy. I won’t move and I won’t sulk anymore. I promise.” He nodded and gave her a single, light tap on the clit and turned back to her nipples, dragging her hand back to his cock arrogantly.

He lasted maybe a handful of minutes and only had to count to four before she managed to get the better of him with her soft hand and her panting and moaning. She was teetering in the edge, his mouth and fingers on her tits enough to keep her there but not tip over that precipice with absolutely no way to find friction around or near her folds. But he was done or very nearly at any rate. “Where do you want Daddy to come baby? Your hand? Your mouth? You name it and I’ll give you what you need.” She whimpered so softly that he nearly lost the fight then and there when he met her tortured and need filled eyes. “My chest Daddy! I want it all over my chest. Please?” He cursed softly and shot up into his knees, wrapping his own hand overs hers and guiding her to directing him and then he all but roared as her chest popped up tantalisingly out of the water and he shot ropes of white hot seed all over those sweet mounds he had been worshipping.

Jaime didn’t give her or himself time to breathe or come down OR wash his mess off of her, he simply pulled her up to kneel before him, pressed flush to his chest and dipped both hands down, one slipping between her thighs and rubbing hard and fast up and down her drenched cleft, teasing her rear and her entrance with ALMOST dipping inside and rubbing at her clit vigorously and returning over and over and the other? The other he delivered the promised smacks to her sexy, round globes. One! Two! And then Three and Four. His beautiful girl positively exploded in his arms screaming and clawing at his back. 

And then she fucking bit him. Making him grunt and grip her ass cheek tight whilst his fingers found her ass again And probed lightly. Not pushing in fully, but enough that she could feel his intent. It was violent and it was sexy and it was worth it when she sagged against him, her arms wrapped around his back, her tongue lapping at the blood she drew directly over his heart, languidly. He let out a small chuckle at that. His little wolf had laid claim to his heart. Even if she didn’t realise she had. And now he would have the reminder of it forever.

“I bit you!” He laughed softly and turned to sit back in the now nearly cool water, pulling his contrite, beautiful girl into his lap as he did so, cuddling around her and pressing his lips hard to her temple to breathe her in. Fuck it! He was done! His decision was made. Now he just had to figure out the hows, hopefully without needing to resort to asking the pair of helpful idiots outside to interfere even more than they already had. 

“And I smacked your ass. I also left a terrible amount of stubble rash on you, far more than I intended AND I played with your ass without asking permission first. If we are comparing notes. I won’t say it didn’t hurt, but I really don’t mind Sansa. My wolf was a little overwhelmed.” He smiled gently and patted her sweat slicked hair back from her flushed face, cupping her head in his big hands and bringing her closer so he could kiss her forehead over and over. She didn’t know it yet. But she was his and he was going to worship her, kinks and all. One day she would bite him hard enough to draw blood again and then she would smirk at him with arrogant pride, like a wolf should. He smirked in amusement at the thought of it.

“And who are you, that proud Lord said, that I should bow so low? Only a cat of a different coat, that’s all the truth I know. A coat of gold, or a coat of red, the lion still has claws. And mine are long and sharp my lord, as long and sharp as yours.” 

She shuddered slightly in his arms, losing the fight with suppressing her giggles with his every out of tune note, until she was doubled over in his lap, drawing his own laughter out right along with hers. “OUCH! What?!” He stole her hand to stop her adorable, embarrassed slapping and pinned her in his arms to lay smacking kisses to her face. “Stop it! GODS! I BIT YOU AND MADE YOU BLEED JAIME! That’s not? I hurt you and it’s going to SCAR! AND YOU ARE SINGING ABOUT IT!” He hummed in amused agreement, utterly smitten with her outraged look. 

He felt lighter already knowing that he was going to win her heart and make her his. Tyrion and Arya were right. Everyone who mattered would accept it eventually, if not quickly. BUT for Cersei. And it really made no matter that it was Sansa, she would hate anyone he cared for anyway. Telling her everything still scared him, as did his sisters potentially violent reaction. But with support, which he apparently had already? .... And Arya was right too. They couldn’t chance not knowing this sort of happy, because of a what if, that may never come. They were adults.

“And I’ll wear that scar with pride sweetheart. It was hardly abuse of any sort. You were overwhelmed and you didn’t realise you were doing it. It will make for a vivid reminder of the best weekend of my life, every time I look at it.” She whined pathetically and wrapped her arms around his neck to hug him. “You shouldn’t be being so sweet and... CUTE about my being a violent heathen Jaime!”

He scoffed lightly and held her tight like she clearly wanted, rubbing his hands all over her soft, smooth back slowly. “We are predators baby. Lions, wolves? Sometimes we play rough. NOW! This water is freezing and we are both utterly filthy from our little fight for dominance! What do you say we warm this up and actually wash ourselves, so we can go get dirty again in bed?” He hummed happily at the feel of her soft lips tracing the broad muscle from his neck to his shoulder and her delicate fingers playing in his hair. “Mmm. You don’t want to go upstairs for cookies and hot chocolate first? Straight to bed from here?” He pulled back and studied her curiously for a moment, noting the way she avoided his eyes and flushed sheepishly. And he couldn’t help but wonder if their more detached playing today, was making her think. It was a harsh contrast from the night before in her tower, where she had not only implied it needed to be different to almost protect the romance of her sanctuary, but where she was tempting him again despite her determination for distance. “Let’s warm this water up and actually get clean first hmm? And then YOU decide sweetheart. I’m happy with whatever you want to do.”

Jaime dialled it back after that. She didn’t actually say it, but it was pretty clear that her biting him hard enough to draw blood, had pushed her own comfort levels too far for anything more adventurous that night. Just as it was clear that she had made her mind up about what she wanted before the bath had finished being heated up again. He didn’t actually mind either way, so long as she wanted him to stay, he was happy. Which apparently hadn’t been in question at all. So they played in the bath, mucking around and splashing, almost wrestling and laughing, stealing kisses and attempting to wash each other, which just resulted in more wrestling. And then when they were dry and dressed once more - he in only the pair of sweats he brought with him and her utterly fracturing his mind by stealing and wearing only HIS shirt! They ventured upstairs once more into her safe haven, to curl up on the sofa before the fire together. A mug of the afore promised hot chocolate in each of their hands and a container of her cookies between them.

If anyone had told him that he would find such an evening enjoyable before this, he might have snorted at them for it. He had his pride after all. Secretly he had craved nights just like it. Not specifically nights spent bathing and eating cookies and drinking hot chocolate by the fire of course. But he had craved nights filled with companionship, simple intimacies, that relaxed domesticity... LOVE. He had wanted it, but it just didn’t fit with what he had with his sister. It didn’t fit with any other lover he had had. Long term or short. But it fit with Sansa, because she fit. He just hoped he could convince her in time that the worries they shared only that morning, weren’t all that worrying after all. And he hoped that that infinitely good, sweet heart could accept him, transgressions and all, without his breaking her in the process of telling her. 

He reached out and tucked her hair away gently, behind her ear, smiling at the shy sparkle in her eye as he did so. “Do you want to sleep here, or find a bed Baby?” It was an intimate question. Not the sort of thing a part time lover who means nothing and wants no more, asks. It was loaded. But her bringing him in here again had cracked that window between the two sides of what they had. And he knew what she was saying when she had done it. Still, in her mind it had an expiration date, and that was alright for now too. He would wait and lead her towards him slowly. Just as her sister had advised. She smiled softly at him and took his hand, lacing their fingers together and holding tight. “Take me to bed Jaime.” He sighed quietly in relief and stood, pulling her up with him and tucking her into his side fully before kissing her forehead. “Come on then.” He let her pull away only long enough to pack up their mess and turn the gas off to the fireplace, whilst he picked up her blanket and waited for her to join him. Once more he would do as she asked and take her to bed. He had no intention whatsoever of settling in to ONLY sleep. Though he would definitely be doing that too. He would have her all night in an actual bed and they’d only cracked the surface of her pleasures yet.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Get your stack hats and crayons ready kids! Shit is about to get real!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An advanced warning - I’ve wrestled with this one quite a bit today and I’m still not sure I’m completely comfortable with it. Thoughts and criticisms would be very welcome here! 
> 
> Also note, this is the last of my pre-prepped chapters. Uploading will slow off from here, though, hopefully not beyond a day or two for new chapters. We are coming close to closing out this part of my semi-planned series.
> 
> Be kind! This one was brutal on me!

SUNDAY MORNING.

Sunday mornings were always an exercise in chaos around Ruby Fort. Much to Roberts chagrin, it was historically, the departure date for all of House Baratheon, and usually the Lannister’s too. Though she couldn’t say if that had been the case in recent years of course; but Cersei had made that decision years ago. Always sprouting about needing to be back early enough to prepare for the coming week. She hadn’t ever been wrong of course, technically speaking, Robert was the CEO of BaraCorp, even if Stannis did more of the work from what everyone understood, whilst Renly headed operations in The Stormlands proper. They all knew that it had more to do with her reaching her politeness limits. This year was a little different, in that The Lannister brothers were staying to hash out some business propositions between North and West. The opportunity to work it more as a meeting of friends available, with her father and Tyrion agreeing to work through a plan for the basics. And Jaime? He was staying because she’d asked him to in a moment of weakness. Though his official reasoning was that he was his brothers ride and he could work from his laptop there for the day if needs be. Another difference was that near all of her siblings and her uncle would be heading out also. Theon had to get back to work and Robb would be going with him. Rickon had school as he’d already had half of the previous week off to come down and he had exams coming up. Gendry had to work too and would go along with them, leaving Arya to make her way home with their parents instead. And of course Bran was ready to be away from too many people in such close quarters, plus Uncle Ben who always headed out on Sundays too.

Truthfully, she hadn’t wanted to get out of bed at all. She had only managed a few hours of sleep, though it had been the sleep of the dead, she did have to grant that! But Jaime had taken full advantage of her willingness for more ‘vanilla’ sex as he called it. And she could thank all of The Gods Old and New, that she had a friend like Margaery Tyrell who had given her a crash course on sex when she discovered her lack of awareness! Because at least she understood that he meant normal sex. Though it still wasn’t exactly what she had come to understand as ‘normal’ either. He had managed to bring her off being over her, in the missionary position that Harry had favoured with her. And in her mind - and to Jaime, she had had to concede that Theon had been correct in his assumptions. Harry Hardyng had a small dick that he did not know how to use to bring pleasure to women.

Then Jaime had taken full advantage of it again at four thirty in the damned morning when he kissed her awake and pushed into her yet again, whilst spooning her on their sides, exactly how they had been sleeping so soundly only moments before. So no, she hadn’t wanted to get up. She had wanted to curl back up with him and go back to sleep. But it was easier to simply get up and take advantage of being able to shower together and ready for the day because it was so early and they were awake already. It also meant he was back in his room before any of his family thought to search him out. Though he had left his clothes in the room they had sort of made their own too. He claimed it was so if he was spotted before he got back, he could claim he had just been out for a walk or in the kitchen, rather than returning from a bedroom not his. She knew it was because he was stating his intention to be back the next night.

For herself, she had to wonder if this was her finally actually clearing up one of the single rooms in the family wing finally. Her little brothers would be happy if she did! But the question was - Would she want to be there when she was at Ruby Fort now instead, to remember what they once had. Or would she have to have that room gutted one day, so the memories of being with him there didn’t haunt her. 

There was no point her trying to keep distance. It hadn’t worked. The feelings were still growing, perhaps even more so than they could have if they weren’t being so... WILD. The fact that he accepted everything she did to him and vice versa, was enough to undo her. She had hurt him for crying out loud. REALLY hurt him, and he brushed it off with a laugh as though it was something to be proud of because it had happened in the heights of passion. Had she done something like that with Joffrey, he’d have beaten her back and blue and left bite marks all over her in his rage. Harry would have called her all manner or horrid things and guilted her forevermore over it. But Jaime had laughed. Called her his wolf. He sang The Rains Of Castamere because her claws are as sharp as his. 

And then he had stepped back from their antics and simply been with her. Enjoyed her quiet company. He wasn’t turned off by her because of it. If anything he seemed to want her even more because they were in an actual bed, like a normal pair of lovers might be. So there was no point trying to make it carefree anymore. It didn’t matter if they were ‘making love’ or fucking like heathens with his hand at her throat, effectively choking her. The vital point was that it was Jaime Lannister. No matter how she sliced it, even simply speaking to the man terrified and excited her in equal measure. Because he WAS everything she had always wanted. AND he was still everything she shouldn’t risk everything to have.

It was her once small chance at love. The kind you find in the fairytales. It had also been doomed from the start. But she would take what she could get and carry her memories of it close. If she could handle being in Cersei’s presence on those few rare occasions, when she wanted her dead, than she could handle seeing Jaime back on the periphery when it was done too.

Her heart would break on the morrow with farewells, of that she had no doubt now. She would also, very likely be buckled down with self loathing and guilt, for putting herself in a place of vulnerability like she had. For asking the same of him. It wasn’t just members of her family who would suffer the fallout from the drama their relationship could cause. Part of her would rejoice her crazed antics and another would bury them deep inside where they and Jaime also, couldn’t hurt her OR tempt her...

——————

Because she was up so early, she turned her mind to organising a hearty breakfast for everyone. Which meant that she had opportunity to actually say her farewells away from Cersei, as she knew those of the Baratheon/Lannister lots who needed to be conscious of the unspoken demands of loyalty, would search her out there privately to save on the drama. Robert didn’t care of course, he would still likely crush her in a bear hug in front of everyone as they waved them off, hateful wife be damned. But she didn’t want to cause unnecessary issues for her friends by antagonising the woman either.

The first one to pop up in the kitchen, surprising her quite a bit, was actually Mr Lannister. She hadn’t actually shared more with him than a quiet greeting. And she really wasn’t sure how she felt in his presence either, but he had never been cruel or mean to her in anyway. He simply didn’t notice her, beyond what was expected of him to maintain proper decorum. He was an imposing man, he always had been, but now that she knew Jaime as she did? He seemed a lot less terrifying and more... Detached perhaps. A God, walking amongst men. Austere and fierce and commanding. Yet his eyes were almost kind in their quiet assessment, when they landed on her from the other side of the wide counter in the large industrial kitchen. 

“Good Morning Mr Lannister. Go ahead and help yourself, or let me know if there’s something in particular that you’d prefer? I just kind of threw a bit of everything together, you can have first servings though, you ARE the first to investigate after all!” She smiled shyly and turned her eyes back to the griddle that was loaded with bacon quickly. She could feel him studying her silently before he slipped in behind her and reached for the coffee pot. She grabbed a mug from the cabinet because she happened to be closer and handed it over. He had to know where they were, she had seen him drinking coffee and tea and not always when someone was in the kitchen to help him either. But she was being polite, and truthfully he scared her a bit still. 

“Thank you Miss Stark. You did this all yourself this morning?” She looked over at the counter curiously and then back at him. Compared to some of the breakfast feasts - and not even mentioning her mothers dinner feasts! This was nothing at all. Of course she had been up early, so she had spent a fair amount of time juicing and sorting the cold servings, like the fruit platter, and prepping so that when she did cook, the food would stay warm in the ovens without going yuck from being there too long. She had even had time to put together containers of snacks and sandwiches so that her siblings and uncle wouldn’t need to find somewhere to pull up along the road for lunch. It was a couple of hours work, and she was avoiding everything else anyway. 

“No one should venture far without a decent breakfast in their belly. My mother would be overrun by helping everyone who is headed out today, to organise themselves and my Father would be talking to Robert probably.” The man hummed quietly behind his cup, his eyes shining with an odd curiosity and almost amusement. But he sat down right there at the bench and served himself efficiently. Cocking a brow at her in astonishment when she paused his hand and waved it away from the semi warm bacon platter and flipped freshly cooked pieces on his plate for him instead. “If you are the first to eat, you get freshly cooked.” She winked playfully and went back to cooking, humming happily. Pretending he wasn’t there wasn’t as easy as she had hoped though.

“Curious song choice this morning Red.” She froze at the sound of his amused voice behind her and then groaned. Of course she had been humming that! For the Gods sake, why wouldn’t the ground just open up and swallow her whole already. “It’s impolite to draw attention to a ladies embarrassing follies you know! And it’s your fault anyway! It’s been stuck in my head since you called me mean the other day!” She didn’t turn, but she didn’t need to, to know he was smirking at the back of her head. She also didn’t need him to tell her that her quick little half truth was a terrible cover story! He knew full well why it was stuck in her head! “I didn’t call you mean at all. I asked if you were, to which you hilariously replied that your claws were as long and sharp as mine.” She huffed slightly and closed her eyes, breathing in a calming breath before turning and lifting her chin arrogantly, making him grin wickedly. “And yet here you are, testing my limits despite knowing that I am, indeed, very mean. Sit and eat Lannister. You’re Father and I were quite enjoying the peacefulness of the LACK of incessant chatter.”

She turned back to her cooking and ignored his chuckling beside her as he poured his coffee. She didn’t help him out as she had his father. Leaving him to fend for himself. “Is that bacon straight from the pan?” She smirked to herself and ignored him pointedly as his father let out an almost amused humming noise. “I didn’t insult Miss Stark when I stepped into her kitchen Jaime.”  
“Ba-.” She flushed heavily and turned away quickly, pouring herself a cup of coffee as Jaime choked and coughed on what he had almost called her in front of his Father. 

Her heart was pounding in her chest. HARD. She turned and reached into the fridge for the water pitcher and poured him a glass silently. Trying desperately to hide her mortification with an unusually awkward attempt to help. “And here I was thinking to complain about the service! Thank you Sansa.” He smiled sheepishly and she sighed softly and pursed her lips at him in annoyance as her heart rate slowed again, mainly thanks to Tywin Lannister turning back to his food with an annoyed huff aimed at his son. “You’re welcome.”

“So, Miss Stark? Your Father tells me you’ll be graduating in coming weeks?” She turned and smiled at the older Lannister, turning the griddle off completely and slipping the next tray of bacon into the oven, to await the masses, alongside the eggs and warmed pastries and breads already being kept in there. And the few taking up space on the counter and rapidly cooling thanks to the slower traffic flow through the kitchen with all of the frantic packing. “Indeed I am. I have my senior showcase in around a months time and graduation just after that.” 

The man nodded slightly and rested his elbows on the bench to cup his coffee mug and she reached to clear his plate away out of the way. “Thank you... Major in design - clothing. Yes? Minors in business and journalism?” She hummed in affirmation and scraped his leftovers into the large bucket they kept for the wolves and slipped the plate into the sink before turning and laying the tea towel over her shoulder to face the man speaking to her properly. 

“Yes. Though neither are actually technically ‘minors’ in truth. They were just elective courses to add to the Design Major, specifically tailored to the industry. But I am attempting to cover my bases. I will be graduating with, HOPEFULLY, excellent marks, from the top fashion institute in the country. That still doesn’t guarantee even an internship, let alone work with any decent label. So? I cast a slightly wider net.” The mans mouth twitched slightly in approval. Meanwhile Jaime was actually grinning around his coffee mug, dare she think it - proudly. “A very smart move. Have you made inquiries for internships yet?” She picked up her own cup, the one she poured whilst panicking over Jaimes slip. “I have. I am waiting to hear back, but if nothing comes of it, I thought to do some travelling first. I have my trust fund of course, but I’ve been working in The Vale anyway, so I have savings and experience in retail, so I can work my way around if needs be too, gain some life experience.” 

It was almost surreal, to stand there, serving breakfast to her lover and his father, whilst talking of her plans for the future. It was very domestic. Every bit as domestic as the night before - AFTER the insane bathroom antics! And it wasn’t at all uncomfortable. Not even with that curious glint that was shining brightly in the Great Lions eyes.

“You won’t use your vast connections to high profile people to get a foot in the door?” She snorted rudely at Jaime and rolled her eyes. It was unladylike and not usually something she allowed anyone to see but her family and friends - and more recently him. And NOW he had her misbehaving in front of his father? He was a terrible influence on her! It was lucky for him that she found him as adorable and sexy as she did.

“You can put a crown on any mans head, but it doesn’t make him a king Jaime... YES, I could walk on a red carpet right through the front doors of the fashion empire just on my name and connections alone, I imagine, but that doesn’t mean I deserve it and it doesn’t mean I’ll be good enough either. When they crown me Queen of that world? I’ll have earned it.” She blushed heavily as he chuckled darkly at her arrogant cheek and shot his now actually smiling Father a look and then her another. She had drawn The Great Lions attention apparently. She hadn’t even known the man did smile... EVER! But he smiled at her?

“Did you apply anywhere in Lannisport by chance?” She bit her cheek uncomfortably and cleared her throat, blushing profusely. She had a feeling she knew exactly where this was going. And now the smile made a little more sense. The kind that had her nerves firing under her skin. “I did. Yes.” Tywin Lannister hummed softy and nodded. “If you get it? And you still wish to travel for a time first? Give me a call and I’ll have the position held for you. I won’t interfere otherwise. Your work ethic - and your cooking, is to be commended.” She blinked rapidly and gaped in shock. Utterly floored. THAT she hadn’t expected at all. Nor had the mans son by the look of disbelief on his face. “I will bid you farewell now Miss Stark, to save on any unnecessary issues later in the morning. Jaime can give you my contact details. And Jaime? Leave her be. She has a lovely humming voice and her choice of tunes, whilst curious, is only another point in her favour, in my opinion. Call me when you get back to the city, I’ve a few things I’d like to discuss.” She swallowed hard and thanked him quietly, offering her hand properly before he walked out. 

“You know what you just did don’t you?” She shuddered slightly as he slipped up behind her at the sink where she had turned to process a little as she rinsed the plate he had used off. “I just put myself in The Great Lions line of sight and he noticed our being friendly in one single span of conversation.” He hummed quietly in affirmation, close to her ear and stroked her hip as he reached around her with his other hand to slip his plate and mug into the soapy water. “I’m sorry if it puts you in an awkward spot.” He kissed her jaw, right by her ear and squeezed her hip before pulling away and leaning into the counter beside her. He was getting bolder apparently.

“Don’t be. I am actually well versed in avoiding his implications and his demands Baby.” She slapped at him with the tea towel pointedly. Reminded about his slip with his endearment. “I’m sorry! THAT was... Uncomfortable... But I mean it Sansa. Don’t let it worry you. His unprecedented offer will stand.... You never mentioned travelling?” She sighed heavily and turned back to the water to avoid his eyes. He was only curious, but still. “You never asked. And that wasn’t my concern... I wasn’t expecting that.” He huffed a tired laugh and nodded, flexing his hands around the lip of the counter top where he pressed them. “I am sure you weren’t. And no, I didn’t. I didn’t know if I was allowed to ask those sorts of things.” She shrugged like a confused child and looked up at him almost sadly. She didn’t know if she should want him to want to know those things. And that was a very big problem. He sighed heavily beside her and almost slumped, or what might pass for a slump for someone as naturally graceful as Jaime. “Pretty sure we have talked about far heavier things than future plans for our lives Jaime. And I mean... We are... FRIENDS now too?”

“We have Yes, and I suppose we are... It sounds like you have everything figured out though. You should be proud. - AND HEY? If you want a bodyguard/companion for your travels? Give me a call hmm? I wouldn’t be missed from my infernal desk for a few weeks. PLUS! I did say we should just run away.” She let out an almost relieved laugh at his tone switching back to teasing and playful. “Ahh! But see it was my intention to only travel if nothing came from my applications!” Jaime smirked at her in amusement and leaned low to whisper into her ear. “Lannisport will be yours if you want it and NOT just because my Father offered what he did. He will do no more than he said, and it will need to be your own merit that gets you an offer... But the biggest designer in Lannisport has already seen you work and when she sees your application, she will be reminded of that birthday dress you made for Cella.” 

She whipped around and looked at him intently, studying that stupid, arrogant grin on his irritatingly handsome head. Her heart slamming in her chest. Not just at his proximity, but what he actually meant by his words. How he knew she had made Myrcellas gown she would never know. It’s not like she had even been at the big formal ‘welcome to adulthood’ soirée. She had found an excuse to keep her drama with Cersei from causing issues on her friends birthday. She had taken her to the spa for the day and out to dinner, and gifted her the shimmering gown she had spent weeks getting just right. And Cell had accepted her intent to be absent with a sad smile and a tight hug - and tears for the dress of course. But she hadn’t actually thought much on the fact that one of the design internships she had applied to was for Genna Lannister’s company. She almost hadn’t applied there because she knew her name would be recognised. And now she had cause to worry that it would be her name, not her work speaking in her favour.

She started slightly and then softened when he leaned in and pressed his lips to her own softly. He was being reckless again. But Gods didn’t she love kissing him! And Gods! Didn’t she just want this to be how it was? Especially when he offers support and advice and pride so easily? She sighed as he pulled back and studied her face intently. “Gen gushed about that dress Sansa. And the only reason I even knew about it or thought to care at the time. Was because Cersei overheard it and made more than a few scathing remarks about you, and over Myrcella wearing a NOBODY for her big night, and I was unfortunate enough to be close enough at hand to bare witness. Fortunately for me though? My Aunt was rather brutal and sent her stomping off in a snit. She will want you for your talent. Of that, I have no doubt. And if that dress is any indication of your actual talent Baby? She won’t be alone in it.” The earnestness in his eyes almost melted her heart in her chest. How in the world no one but Tyrion had figured out that there was something happening between them, she would never know. Since that very first knock on her window, Jaime Lannister had been an experience in loving, supportive, gentle, teasing and PROUD boyfriend.... That’s what it was... He acted like they were together, fully, out in the open for the world to see. She leaned in and kissed him hard, letting her hands trace the hard muscles of his chest and abdomen gently as she savoured every single touch of his loving hands and his perfect lips on hers. Trying not to let the panic in her blood take hold and losing the fight spectacularly.

“Can you cook? Supervise precooked, warming food?” He hummed in affirmation and cocked a brow in question. She nodded deftly and stepped back. “I need a minute... Bathroom... Can you deal with -?” She waved around the room as he nodded in confusion and then she fled. Not that she got very far before his arm was around her from behind and his lips were pressed to her ear. “Bathroom or space sweetheart?” She sagged slightly and shook her head. She was on the brink of tears and he had to know it. He was too attuned to her to miss it. She just needed to breathe. “I just need... A minute... Please?” Jaime let out an almost pained, clearly frustrated breath, and kissed her jaw softly with so much need, hugging her to his chest. “I’ll let you go, clear your head, take a breath. Whatever you need. But I need you to tell me that we can talk later about what happened just now hmm?” She didn’t really want to. She just wanted. She didn’t know what she wanted in truth, but for the moment, the most obvious answer was... SILENCE. “We will talk later. Please just let me go Jaime.” She almost sobbed when he pushed his face into the back of her head and rested his own there for a moment before kissing her hair and letting her go enough to rub his hands up and down her arms, clearly scared and reluctant to actually let her go. But let her go he did. And that was just one more thing that made him... The love of her life... She LOVED him. And she was so damned lost because of it that she clean missed the curious eyes trailing her flight from the kitchen.

——————

“The little dove takes flight. I think I’ve seen this one before... What happened hmm? Jaime get too clingy or was he too rough maybe? I can see he did get rough at some point already... just here... You are just lucky it was that weak hand, else that bruise might have been much harder to hide. Typical! He finally gets around to strangling you for killing our son. And he fails because he’s too caught up in your tight cunt.” The blood in her veins turned to ice as she watched the lioness stalk closer to her. Desperately searching her mind for words, but coming up short. 

Tears had already started clouding her eyes before she made it out of the kitchen. They had already slipped from her control and run unbidden down her cheeks as she tried to slip out the back unnoticed. And now they were clogging her throat as she processed exactly what had come out of that mad woman’s sneering mouth. Her first instinct had been to defend Jaime... She wanted to defend Jaime Lannister in the face of despicable verbal smack downs out of his twin sister and once closest confidants vile mouth. She had run, because she realised the direction their relationship had taken, and it terrified her. Yet it was a violent possessiveness that over took her now. Flight had turned to fight in the split second it had taken to register the hissed words.

Cersei smiled like a beautiful, crazed predator, looking for that next taunting bite, playing rather than going for the kill. But she had claws too. “You didn’t know, did you?” She let a slow, dangerous smile of her own slide across her face as she straightened to her full height and looked down her nose at the woman. “Didn’t know what exactly? That I’m sleeping with your brother and that sometimes we BOTH like it rough? OR that you’re unstable? Trust me, I got that loud and clear.... And... Well? Jaime is memorable.” Cersei let out an evil little laugh and sneered as she stepped closer, clearly in an attempt to intimidate her. She wasn’t having it. None of it. She wasn’t afraid of this pitiable, mad creature anymore. She was DONE with the head games. She had been terrified of facing this woman. So much so that she had missed out on important moments over the years, so that she could save everyone the discomfort of this exact confrontation. So that she didn’t risk upsetting a poor grieving mother simply by existing in the world after her abusive ex boyfriend left it. 

“I know you didn’t miss what I said little dove. You may be a stupid little thing. But you aren’t deaf. Does he call my name when he’s inside you I wonder?” She would take a lot. Had taken a lot. She had weathered being beaten and screamed at and belittled and manipulated and treated like a possession. She had carried guilt and heart ache and fear. She had smiled prettily and apologised for things outside of her control, played nice to keep the peace and NOW she was prepared to sacrifice a possible life time of happiness, cutting it down to one infinitesimal weekend of fond memories, of ultimate happiness. For the sake of keeping a peace that she now wasn’t so sure would actually be all that disrupted. Tyrion knew and was supportive, and the curious way Tywin Lannister had looked at her had given her pause too. And if Cersei had seen it? It was possible others had noticed too. Yet there had been no objections. No disappointed looks. No words of warning - in fact her own mother had implied that she was meant for a ‘MAN’ not a boy.... Curious how she had spoken of such a thing only the day before she...

And now whether the disgusting accusations held merit or not? This evil woman was attempting to tear down the only romantic relationship she had ever had, where she felt loved. She wanted to sully how she saw the only BOYFRIEND to treat her kindly. And she would NOT HAVE IT. She would not let her tear Jaime down that way. Her words would be far more destructive on them all, were she to voice them further, than if she was to admit to them all in one single setting, that she and Jaime were together. Their relationship might be frowned upon by their families, and it might truly hurt a few people initially. And YES she was terrified of tearing everything apart if it ended badly, and all she had ever known was bad endings in romance... AND she was utterly terrified at owning that she loved a man so much older than her too, which was petty, she knew it! But she knew how it would look to outsiders too, and that had always been something she remained conscious of... secretly she was terrified that it would work too, which was a hard thing for her to admit, even to herself... But the things Cersei spoke of? Myrcella and Tommen and.... Everyone. The damage it could do? Even if Cella hated her forever for taking up with Jaime, it wouldn’t be nearly as destructive for her sweet friend than having her mother announcing her as a child born of incest.

She met her eyes coldly and straightened even further, ignoring the sick feeling building inside of her at what she meant to do. But Cersei was a bitch long before she became unstable, and if the stupid woman hated her so much that she was willing to risk hurting her own children, just to take her down, to make her feel bad about herself? Than she would protect those same children - her friends and even bloody Joffreys memory too, her damned self! 

She leaned in close and smiled, with a confidence she didn’t at all feel. “He calls me quite a few things actually. But NEVER that. Baby? All the time, he nearly called me by that in front of your Father just now.... Sweetheart? Sure. Good girl? Pretty girl? Naughty girl? My wolf? My Lady? Sans? Red? LOVE.... But NEVER THAT.” She pulled back again slowly and took in the feral sneer coldly. Her confidence growing with his voice in her head, telling her that none of it had ever been her fault. He had brought the wolf out. And even IF once upon a time he had been tangled in an incestuous relationship that resulted in a monster who abused her? He had also walked away from it too. Whether it was Cersei he spoke of or not? He had walked away from his secret lover who had kept him in the shadows and expected him to return begging, and he had not looked back. She was an incredibly selfish woman, and this little performance was proof enough - she was a jealous woman too. If it was true? She was the true reason Jaime had never settled down in anyway. He was afraid of her reaction. OF EXACTLY THIS. And she didn’t have the wherewithal to process such possibilities right in that moment. All that mattered was protecting him.

“You’re perfect, aren’t you? Feeding into his fantasies of being a hero! Unfortunately for you little dove? He will get bored eventually and come back to me. We’ve had moments before, but he always comes back. Because no one else can give him what I do. There’s nothing you can give him that I haven’t already given. And nothing you can do that will make him love you as he does me.” And she had her. That was FAR easier than she expected. Though to be fair... She was playing with a crazy person. Which she supposed was hardly honourable... But she was beyond being the perfect Lady in that moment. She was all wolf and that particular lion was now HERS. “I can’t give him anything... How about we go for everything then?” She stepped back and swung around, striding across the lawn towards and into view of the kitchens on purpose. She didn’t manage the get anywhere near the doors - she had barely rounded the pool deck and put herself in view actually, when she felt the claws in her hair and heard the mad shrieking. She pulled away quickly enough to turn around ‘in shock’, only to have Cersei smack her as hard as she could across the face with her hand curled just like a claw. But the lancing pain and the explosion of dancing lights behind her eye were worth it when she heard the cries of outrage coming from more than one source. Cersei had physically assaulted her ‘without provocation’ where, apparently quite a few people had been available to witness it. HER man included.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled here. Hopefully it works.

SUNDAY.

Jaime tossed the tongs and the tea towel onto the kitchen island beside him and scrubbed his hand through his hair, cursing colourfully in frustration. He didn’t even know what, where or why that went so fucking wrong! His girl was doing his head in! One minute they are awkwardly-almost-sort of bickering, the next they are laughing and then speaking openly and affectionately and then they are getting physical... And then he manages to scare her off, or she scares herself off and pulls away again. It’s been a matter of DAYS! Not weeks. Not months! DAYS! And that seems to be their whole relationship on repeat! It was exhausting and confusing! 

And yet he loved her so deeply already, and he had a sneaking suspicion, that she felt exactly the same way. But she was gun shy. Even more so than he had been. He COULD understand it. He was still scared of their original reasons for holding back too! He was outright terrified of telling her the truth! But he was willing to do it... It was as frustrating as it was relieving that he had gotten to the point of throwing caution to the wind, whilst she was still as skittish as a neglected and terrified animal. He wondered if this was how Cersei felt when her meds were out of whack? Completely off kilter.

He groaned and flopped back to lean into the counter. He wanted to follow her. But it was pretty fucking obvious he had pushed her too far already. He just couldn’t figure out what he had done. And a very large part of him wanted to let his arrogance shine and haul her over his shoulder and up the stairs, to lock them into her tower and force the conversations to happen. An equally frustrated part of him wanted to pull her into his arms and kiss her stupid right there in the open where everyone could see him doing so. He wanted to break down her walls and drive the point home into her pretty little head. He wanted to make it very fucking clear exactly where he stood on what they were doing and where it was going! He had heard somewhere once that communication was fundamental to maintaining healthy relationships... What the fuck did he know about healthy relationships though? Not a single bloody thing! So he had tamped down the asshole inside of him and played it safe.

He knew she was afraid. She told him herself, the things she had suffered. And he didn’t want to force his wants on her. He wanted her to come to him, to be HER CHOICE. Perhaps that was his own insecurities talking to a point too. But the reality was, that neither of them had actually clarified their thoughts or feelings really. They had flirted with the line of talking it over. But they hadn’t actually stated in simple words, what they feared about being together properly. They hadn’t discussed being together either! It was a heat of the moment ‘let’s do this’ type of deal. He groaned and scrubbed hard at his face in realisation. They had done this ALL wrong. Even as far as a fling might go! There had never been clear directions and now it was biting them on the ass. Maybe once he finally set down the proverbial lines in the sand, and convinced her that the whole world wouldn’t implode if everyone found out that he was her dirty old man who couldn’t keep his hands off her, he’d actually bite her ass and mark her too, for trying to send his golden hair grey!

“It’s like watching a train wreck. You just can’t look away, even though you know you shouldn’t watch.” He snorted rudely and pinched the bridge of his nose, refusing to actually look and witness the smug look on his asshole brothers face. “Fuck off Tyrion. I absolutely do not have it in me to graciously take an ‘I told you so’ right now.” His brother snickered softly, only serving to raise his ire further still. “You heard it here. I told him so. I told him he was stupid. That they both were actually. I also told him that I’d bare witness to the pair of fools falling desperately in love and trying to fob it off as nothing more than a doomed tragic romance. When really? The way might be complicated, but not impossible.” He huffed in frustration and ground his jaw hard. He really did not want to deal with his brother right now. What he wanted was to find his girl and make sure that she was fine, that they were fine and it was only his paranoia that had him imagining tears building behind her beautiful eyes. “Is that how you said it, is it? Those were you’re words were they?”

“Oh don’t be persnickety Jaime! Something to that effect! Better?” He laughed ruefully and looked up at the ceiling, trying to tamp down the severity of his overwhelming emotions. He knew he was actually angling to draw him out of his mood by making him laugh, it was a classic Tyrion move. He also knew that he would come away from making light of his plight and ask him genuinely what was going on soon enough. He didn’t actually know what would be worse right now. “Oh trust me brother, you want me being an ass right now. You wouldn’t like the alternative.” His brother hummed in amusement and stepped dangerously close to him. Close enough to actually put a hand on his arm and draw his eyes down to him. “I’m not going to lie. I was eavesdropping and I wasn’t alone in doing so. I did hear some of what was said and I did bare witness to certain affections that I’m fairly sure you were warned against engaging in so openly because ‘anyone could walk in’. I als-“  
Jaime glared down at his brother dangerously, waving a hand to stop him from talking, shoving the consoling hand resting on his arm away before pointing at his nose and then coming up short as he registered that there had been others there all along. He had nothing. Even less so when he spotted exactly who was quietly leaning into the counter, taking everything in. And THEN he panicked silently on the outside... A LOT less so on the inside when processing exactly what those particular snooping bastards had actually been privy to.

“Miss Stark had already seen to preparing a rather impressive fair this morning, before she panicked over the ease with which she found herself amongst the lions. It’s warming in those ovens on that side if you’re ready to eat; whilst we wait for my son to realise his mistake likely wasn’t a mistake at all. That his dramatics following it are serving no purpose other than to hold up the serving of the food his GIRLFRIEND spent hours preparing and to make himself look like an idiot. Did I miss anything Stark?” He had nothing. Surely he had hit his head and this was all some whacky, unbelievable dreamscape? Maybe that’s it? He’ll wake up soon with Sansa wrapped up all soft and sweet and pressed flush against him and this will all have been some subconscious nightmare to tell him to stop being so ridiculous and actually open the lines of discussion with her. He absolutely was not standing in the kitchen. He absolutely was not hearing his Father make light of his plight with what passes for amusement for the old bastard, lacing his tone. And he was not looking at a smirking Ned Stark and remaining in an upright position after his Father called the mans precious Lady daughter HIS GIRLFRIEND. 

“Oh I don’t know Lannister, I think maybe his dramatics might have given him insight on a few things. I don’t much fancy taunting him though, least not when he’s between me and my daughters cooking. And not when I can empathise with being utterly confounded by an emotional she wolf.” He didn’t hear him right. He can’t have heard him right. “Give her time to calm down Lannister. And then for the love of my sanity? Talk to her properly! I can’t even escape talk of you and my lady wolf apparently utterly cocking up your relationship before it really starts - in my own damned bedroom!” Ned Stark waved a fork at him for emphasis and bent to pull the platters out of the oven himself. “Some places are sacred to a man Jaime! I don’t need you invading that space on me - especially when talk of you involves talk of my daughter! My wife doesn’t seem to understand that at the moment!”

“I think we broke him. YES Jaime, Ned and Cat have been aware of the direction of things all along. You DID act her bell hop and then there was the whole blanket business. And you weren’t fooling anyone with that stupid look on your face every time your phone chimes! It also didn’t take Father long to see the exact things I did.-“

“I wasn’t actually AWARE of anything besides your obvious fascination with the girl, until this morning. Where I was privy to hers also.”

“Well I had no fucking idea! What’s this then? You actually dating Neds girl or you letting her get her-“

“For the sake of your own safety Robert? I wouldn’t finish that sentence! LOOK! Brother?   
They noticed BOTH of your interests and your tendency to gravitate towards each other wherever opportunities arose. That’s all. And UNLIKE me and Arya - they didn’t feel the need to meddle. Until now I guess.”

Jaime scrubbed at his face roughly with both hands. Partly in a bid to gain some understanding of exactly what the fuck had just happened. Partly to hide his face so he could process his shock and embarrassment. Partly so that he didn’t glare at Robert for his very nearly stupid query. AND at the rest of the idiots for having stood back and let he and Sansa flounder so, and for being privy to what was meant to be theirs alone and NOT staying out of it, with equal measure. Most of him was snagging on the fact that Ned Stark actually offered up advice - honest to Gods GOOD advice as to how to deal with his daughter. Ned Stark - and his annoyingly perfect wife, were fully aware of and supportive of his relationship with their daughter. Provided talk of their relationships ‘teething problems’ stayed out of Neds bedroom. 

He let his bad hand drop completely, but kept scrubbing at his jaw in an almost nervous gesture as he eyed them all slowly. There were few things he hated as much as he hated appearing weak, vulnerable. And the idiots before him had all been privy to an incredibly private and emotionally charged moment with the woman he loved, whilst their relationship was so raw and new and what he had assumed - not common knowledge. Though he did appreciate that they weren’t expecting him to reply yet, simply getting on with serving their breakfast up and getting on with eating it - except his father who had turned his eyes to something out the opened patio doors, off towards the tree line. Even Tyrion had taken the hint and smiled up at him knowingly before abandoning him for sustenance.

“So what IS going on here Lannister? All I’ve got to go on is that I got stopped in the hall on my way to find food, and told to be quiet. - Plus what we heard... You really accepting this Ned? She did run out crying?” Jaime ignored the bloody oaf, lest he do something stupid, like bust his hand punching the idiot. He turned and focused his aching-from-being-clenched hands on setting up a fresh pot and switching himself off a little to control himself. “Accepting it? What are you expecting me to do Rob? Challenge him to a dual for her honour? Force him before a Septon? It’s none of my business, unless he’s mistreating her, and it’s pretty bloody obvious he isn’t. Besides? This ones a bloody lot sight better than the last one.” He couldn’t help but snort an exhausted, utterly disbelieving laugh. Not only had they BOTH been very wrong about what her parents would think - at least he had? He just assumed it was a concern for her too? - Which also also implied that their age difference being an issue was likely exaggerated also. But he was also rocked by the fact that Ned actually seemed more than merely accepting. Of course he was a lot sight better than the last wanker! But he didn’t expect Stark to think so.

He sighed tiredly and turned to take them all in again as he sipped at the coffee he had poured - more for something to do, than because he actually wanted it. “Much as I appreciate the interest AND acceptance? If you could all maybe NOT approach Sansa with any of this? Until she is ready to actually hear it? TRUST ME she is NOT at the moment. And she’s not actually my girlfriend Dad so maybe don’t say that anywhere around her?”

“So you ARE just sticking it to her? But you WANT more than a bit of fun? OUCH!” He didn’t have time to react himself, Ned was not only less surprised and ultimately faster because of it, he was actually closer. Though he’d have probably closed his fist instead of slapping him around the ears for that! “Still my daughter Robert.” Tyrion was cackling snickering around his food, clearly pleased with this whole incredibly uncomfortable situation. “You kn-“ 

Tyrion’s words were cut rather abruptly by his father cursing and actually running out the door and a God awful, blood curdling screeching. Jaimes blood ran as cold as ice as he swung around to investigate only to see the blow coming. And fucking landing! He near took out the gathering of laughing Stark siblings as they made their way into the kitchen, but he didn’t bother stopping to explain. He didn’t need to because they were running too. What he didn’t expect, what none of them could have possibly comprehended as even a minute possible outcome of it, was The She Wolf fighting back.

The crack from Sansas return strike boomed like thunder across the shocked silent yard. Everyone had froze up on the spot, even Cersei. And then Arya laughed! Uproariously! And whooped, setting her siblings off into uncomfortable laughter. Meanwhile his heart was still in his fucking feet and his Father was dragging his stunned sister towards one of the lawn chairs with a low, rumbling snarl. And then he had her in his arms. Completely uncaring of the fact that he WAS DRAWING ATTENTION. He didn’t fucking care. He was terrified and running on adrenaline and little else. “Is it true?” 

It was like a bucket of water. Three little words. Three LOADED WORDS. He pulled back and studied her face, noting the tear tracks, and the flushing, and the burning red cheek. The raw looking scratches trickling tiny beads of blood and the redness of her left eye and the bruising spidering out from the corner of it. AND the way those tear soaked eyes refused to meet his, staring determinedly over his shoulder. Jaime swallowed hard, ignoring the panic and fear and bile rising up inside of him at how quietly she had uttered them. At what she obviously had been forced to learn from the woman who attacked her. Not so long after fleeing from his side anyway. He cleared his throat and let his fingers hover over her injuries, as if he was inspecting them, wanting to wipe them away with his will alone. “Yes.” There was no point lying. He had meant to tell her soon himself. He didn’t want secrets between them and she had trusted him with so much of herself already. He closed his eyes as she struggled to force down a sob. He didn’t need to see her tears spilling to know that they were. 

Jaime startled slightly at the feel of her hands pushing up between them, almost shyly, and wrapping around his neck, not stopping until her was flush in her arms, with her battered face hidden against his jaw. He groaned in relief and wrapped her in his own, tight enough to be considered crushing. “Please tell me I haven’t lost you completely?” His heart was racing in his chest and in honesty? If it weren’t for everyone else being around to see everything? He might have lost the battle against letting a few tears loose himself. He hated his sister. Fucking hated her. More than anything or anyone in his entire life, he hated her for trying to take this from him. He’d question her working it out - but apparently everyone had worked it out! And he couldn’t afford to waste his energy on thinking about her. Not when he needed to focus on not losing the woman he loved.

He felt her hand slip back over his shoulder and press hard against his chest, making him hiss slightly and then almost groan in relief again. She had pressed down on where she had marked him as her own so viciously. “We need to talk and... I’ll need time... It’s still complicated... Maybe more so. Please just hold me. My face hurts. And my hand.” Jaimes eyes closed of their own accord. It felt like a vice had been loosened from around his heart and he could relaxed into her as the blood flow returned to his extremities because of it. “Anything you need Baby. But... Just so there is no misunderstanding Sansa.... I want YOU. I want us to be together. I’m going to talk to Myrcella in particular, but she and Tom... We will work the rest out later. But I needed you to understand that I’m done hiding. I want MORE.... AND we need to get some ice on this face and that hand probably too. That’s some side arm you’ve got My Lady.” He grinned softly, nervously actually, as she pulled back enough to look at him. And then he grunted softly in shock as she pushed in and kissed him softly, without preamble. Just a single soft press, but it was everything. “Better have that conversation sooner rather than later Ser Jaime, lest I become a cliche in their minds... Sleeping with my friends... UNCLE.” He snorted a surprised laugh and accepted the second press against his lips happily. “Time Jaime. I am yours and you are mine. But I’m going back to my life tomorrow and you are going to give me that.... That was... a LOT. It’s asking a lot to... I’m angry and I’m overwhelmed right now.”

He hummed in understanding and pressed his lips to her forehead gently, breathing her in. He couldn’t blame her for wanting time. It wasn’t nothing that she had just learned. But for the first time... It felt almost like they were on the same page. “I need to attempt some damage control. And your mother is hovering, clearly weighing the merits of being intrusive against her need to care for you, so? Let her see to your injuries please baby. Before she decides she doesn’t like me.” He grinned cheekily at her wide eyed gaping and at her sheepish look over her shoulder to her smirking mother. 

“Oh please! I knew this was coming before it even happened. Come on! Let me clean you up and get a look at it.” Cats hands come to rest gently over her shoulders as she smiled up at him almost lovingly... Which was very uncomfortable thank you very much! He was not all that much younger than her, AND he was fucking her daughter multiple times a day at the moment. - Though THAT might have to stop until she stopped hating him over certain things too... But still! Having Catelyn Stark look at him so kindly when she had to know what he was up to, was very disconcerting. “Myrcella might need you now Jaime. Stannis is trying, but one concerned girl is probably hard enough for him, a second one clearly hurting is a little out of his comfort zone I think. Renly has Tom.” He swallowed hard and nodded. Thanking her quietly and kissing his girls jaw softly before he let her slip away, hugged into her mothers side and into the kitchen. A whole pack of Starks and another of actual wolves trailing behind her.

“She’s twenty years younger than you. That’s not even an exaggeration. She was Joffs age. She was Joffs GIRLFRIEND.... And he really was awful to her. And now you are sleeping with her. Even though you knew how My Mother would react. What is wrong with you?” He sighed heavily and pulled his niece into his arms tight, despite her harsh whispers and angry pushing. He didn’t give a fuck about Cersei’s pain and anger only her violent outburst resulting in his girlfriends face being battered, but Myrcellas reaction hurt. Because it meant he had hurt her. “I was planning on telling you Cell. We were trying to avoid exactly this by keeping it quiet.” She struggled in his arms and growled at him just like a little lioness. And if he wasn’t so damned upset at himself for upsetting her, he might have even found it adorable. “Twenty YEARS.... UNCLE Jaime! She WAS my friend! Like a big sister! You can’t have sex with my friends!” He sighed heavily and led her away from what was left of the crowd a bit. Which was thankfully, only his family and the Baratheons, and Ned. His father had his sister subdued into complete silence, though he had noted her screeching hisses when he had first forced her to sit down. He assumed Tyrion had been sent for her medication, and Ned apparently had managed to prevent Robert from raging, likely by glowering silently in his own fury at his daughters treatment. Tom was angry and embarrassed and completely silent between Renly and Loras, but Catelyn had been right. Stannis had tried, but containing Myrcella in that moment wasn’t exactly easy. He understood that she was embarrassed by her mothers violent outburst, and she was hurt by his and Sansas actions. But given what she now knew? Their relationship being brought to light was a far less dangerous bombshell than what COULD have been said. Not that anyone would believe her of course, no matter the truth of it, it simply being voiced would be devastating for Cella and Tom both. To know their feelings were less important than her chance at hurting Sansa.

He leaned in close to her ear, ignoring her disgusted looks pointedly. “I can. I did. And I will continue to do so. Because I am in love with her. This isn’t nothing Myrcella. Even when it first started, it wasn’t NOTHING. We have both been wracked with guilt and utterly devastated thinking that we couldn’t continue to be together beyond this weekend, because of how it would affect others. YOU!” Her sneering and sarcasm was all him. How they had missed it for near enough to her whole life, he would never understand. Joff had been just like Cersei, in every way but for being a son rather than a daughter. But Tommen looked just like him and Myrcella was all him in her arrogance and anger and pride.

“And what about Mother hmm? Grandfather has already called Uncle Kevan to cover for him at the office and the hospital UNCLE! He’s having her committed again! I KNOW it isn’t fair how she hates Sansa. Blames her for Joff dying! But she HATES her!” He groaned softly and nodded. He didn’t want to be cruel, she was lashing out because he was the easy target right now. And he was glad she was sharpening her claws on his ass and not Sansas. But he was absolutely, well and truly beyond his limit now. “Myrcella? Your mother told Sansa everything. She KNOWS. Which means that your mother was willing to bring that up to the surface, regardless of how much it would hurt people, YOU and TOM included! Just to take a swipe at Sansa.” He sighed heavily and shook his head as she pulled away slightly to blink up at him with such familiar green orbs. They were his eyes. Close enough to his sisters to hide it a bit, but not the same if you knew what to look for. And now they were as shock and devastated as they had been full of rage only moments ago. “I get that she wouldn’t have spoken about it if she didn’t know about Sansa and I. If we weren’t together, that wouldn’t have come up between them. But it did. And no offence sweetheart, but I have spent near enough to my entire life putting your mothers wants and needs above everyone’s, including my own. It wouldn’t have mattered who it was, she’d have hated and likely lashed out at anyone I showed interest in and you know it.” Myrcella settled a a little and looked over at her mother sadly, tucking herself into his arms properly and letting him hold her, but refusing to give in and cry. “Sansa is alright?” He snorted rudely and let out a tired breath. “No. She isn’t. She is angry and hurt and confused. She’ll have a magnificent black eye and she has scratches across one side of her face. BUT! Cell? I think she might have let our relationship come out so that the other things didn’t. I don’t know that for certain... But she also told me I had to talk to you immediately. And I did mean what I said. I was going to speak to you and Tom when we got back to the city.”

“You love her?” He hummed in affirmation and rested his cheek on her hair with an almost relieved sigh. Her words were still cutting, but she had calmed somewhat. “It happened fast. HOW did it happen?” Jaime winced. He didn’t want to have THIS discussion right now. Or ever maybe. “That might be a conversation best left until you and Tom and I can sit down and-“  
“Drunk sex than? Charming.” He groaned loudly and cursed himself a fool. He DID NOT want to.... But his guilt over hurting her was still pretty palpable. The least he could do was TRY to explain. “Actually I umm... I’ve been interested in her since Robbs wedding. I just didn’t mean to ever do anything about it. And then I talked to her here... A couple of times... Saw a very different side of her... And that is enough detail about that for now.... As things stand we are together - or we will be... But she needs time to figure things out I guess? We haven’t actually talked about it yet. Not in detail. And I’d like if we can talk about what it might mean for our relationship too. I get that it’s weird Cell.”  
“Do you? UNCLE!”  
“Cut it out. I get it.”  
“I don’t think you do! I can’t talk boys or sex or laugh about lingerie or sex toys or anything like that with one of my closest friends, because SHE will mean YOU whenever... Icky!”  
“Fucking hells Myrcella!”  
“That’s not even the worst of it! It’s... I’m still angry at you and at her and I’m not going to be alright with this for a while. So if it can not be out -right there, in my face until I get comfortable with it? And it better be serious because I’m not dealing with more weird family drama than we already have to - because you couldn’t keep it in your pants around my pretty friend.” Jaime snorted rudely and rolled his eyes. “Now you are just being petty darling. It’s serious Myrcella. Or it will be if she can get past my past.” His niece snorted rudely right back at him. “It’s Sansa. She’s the queen of forgiveness and acceptance. And she knows about me too now.” He hummed in agreement and kissed her hair softly. “She does. But you know as well as I do, that no one else will ever know it from her mouth. She wouldn’t do that to you.”  
“I didn’t think my mother would either. Not even at her worst.” His heart broken in his chest, but all he could do was hold her. “Neither did I.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More fallout to come.


	12. Chapter 12

SUNDAY AFTERNOON.

“SANS! BUBBY! YOU DON’T NEED NO WHITE KNIGHT! Damn Sis! Bringing the smack down THUNDER! You know that sound carries on water right? They are hearing the song of sweet, sweet vindication ALL up and over The Riverlands tonight! Man! I need a cigarette and a lay down after that!” Sansa snorted a tired but fond laugh as her foolishly proud sister faux swooned into the waiting arms of a snickering Theon and sighed wistfully. She was exhausted. Mentally, emotionally and physically. But her sister was as keyed up as small child on a sugar high. 

“How long have you been sitting on that one Ellis?”

“SO LONG! You have no idea Branny my boy! Except? In my head, it was me finally getting to smack a bitch for upsetting My Lady! So I could be all ‘Sans, BUBBY! I AM YOUR WHITE KNIGHT!’ BUUUT she didn’t need me! THIS is SOOOO much better! Is this what Motherly pride feels like Catwolf? Because I feel like my baby is growing up!” 

She rolled her eyes at her mother as the rest of them laughed right along with their hyped up little wolfling. The very fact that Catelyn Stark was NOT reprimanding her younger daughters inappropriate grandstanding and crowing pride in her elder daughters venture into physical violence, nor the elder daughter for the act of physical violence itself? Spoke VOLUMES. She was far too focused on seeing to her hurts like the adoring, loving, caring mother she was, to draw attention to the fact that her silence was as much an admittance of pride and approval, as if she had actually said it in words. But Sansa sat willingly, where her mother directed her into the dining room chair that Robb had brought out at her mothers instruction and respected her, her proud silence. She was the mother of wolves after all. And wolves protect their own.

She was a little numb actually - besides the throbbing of her swelling face and the stinging of the grazes and slices from Cersei’s nails and rings. Plus her left ear felt a bit blocked by how much it was ringing and her eyes hurt, and not just because one of her fingers hooked into the corner of it - though that had been AWFUL! But from crying also. The rest of her was just kind of.... Tuned out. She smiled and watched as her siblings turned to humour, to process their own outrage, but she couldn’t seem to find that same coping mechanism herself. 

She had been hit before, more than once, but Joffrey never hit her face, except during that final beating. And of course she had known it was coming, she even taunted the mad Woman into doing it. Knowing full well, that if she attacked her without provocation - Tywin Lannister WOULD have her committed again, likely for a far longer period of time, with far greater focus given, in a facility specifically designed to cater to the needs of those with conditions like Cersei’s. Of course they wouldn’t be able to cure of her megabitchitis, but with enough time, enough therapy, the right balance of medications and enforced management of them, maybe she could rehabilitate one day. However unlikely that seemed at the moment.

It was cruel, and underhanded of her to pull such a stunt. It wasn’t in her nature to be THAT person. But whether her words were all bravado, or whether she intended them to come across as the threat she had interpreted them as, or if she simply wanted that cheap thrill of ruining Jaime in her eyes? Perhaps it was simple jealousy and she genuinely believes her words to be truth. Ultimately, she told someone she had hated for years, someone she believes capable of something as atrocious as MURDER! A secret that could destroy her children’s lives, all of her families. She put her need to hurt her, above the lives of her children. She obviously didn’t understand that, her love for her children was one thing that was truly good about Cersei. Her redeeming quality maybe? But at the end of the day, it was the sort of information that was a danger to them, it could also buckle their business empires. Unlike hundreds of years ago, a little thing called DNA testing exists. No one would believe her on her word, especially if Jaime were to deny it, but she only needed to convince one person enough to look into it too. She only needed to be overheard spewing such claims... It only needed to be voiced as a suspected scandal, and both companies stocks would drop. And people would sneer or worse, at her friends - her ‘family’.... Even if they refuted it immediately? The damage would be done. But if she was institutionalised for her obvious and already certified psychological disorders, because she was a danger someone? Such claims could be seen as a delusion she suffers from, much like her conviction of her being responsible for Joffrey dying was.

Of course she didn’t put all that much stock into such extreme circumstances ever coming to fruition. It was far too cloak and dagger. It wasn’t exactly like they were in the Middle Ages where such things could amount to treason and start a blood feud or all out civil war or something equally as gruesome and ridiculous. But the point was that she had taken a risk that she shouldn’t have because she was obsessed with hurting her. And that simple act would be hurtful to Myrcella and Tommen. She hadn’t actually said that they were ALL Jaimes children. Only that Joff was his son. But that minor detail wouldn’t hold up were they to find out what she had said. She wasn’t about to tell them any of it. They didn’t know she had pretty well ensured the woman hit her in front of people so she could make sure she was institutionalised as she should be. And she would not be telling them that she had done it, to protect them from their own mothers careless antics. She just hoped they didn’t hate her... For loving their biological father.

And she did love him. In a span of days, a matter of moments, a BLINK of the eye. She had been introduced to a different side of the man, connected in a curiously caring, friendly way, developed a dependency, and fallen in love. She hadn’t wanted to risk the sorts of dramas they had had to weather today, by taking more and being greedy. But it was clear she had been very wrong about the reactions of most of them. She had listened and watched out of the corners of her eyes when he pulled her into his arms, looking so terrified and angry and oddly proud as well, at her fighting back she assumed! And it didn’t feel like anyone even noticed, let alone cared. And then her mothers words, when she joined them? They reminded her of what she had remembered when listening to Cersei’s carry on. Her mother had known before she did, which meant her father did too. As did Tywin Lannister. His curious looks could only mean that he’d figured it out too. So it really wasn’t the risk she had scared herself into thinking it was. BUT now she had to deal with processing the fact that he had been intimate with his sister. Not just once or twice as a potential -black out drunk, don’t remember what happened moment. - though even under such circumstances, normal people don’t sleep with their siblings. The thought of Theon or Jon made her sick enough and they weren’t technically her brothers!

Jaime - the man she loved! The perfect fool who was EVERYTHING she had always wanted and so very much more... He had engaged in an incestuous relationship with his twin sister, his bitchy, violent, crazy, control freak of a sister who wanted her dead. He claimed it was over after her carrying on at him, for not standing up for Joffrey. He said he had tried to help her when she got out of hospital, but in the end he had had to walk away. He had said a lot of things. And he would have to say a lot more in truth, if she was to ever find a way to be comfortable with trusting that that part of his life was truly over. She would have to trust that not only would she not walk in on him with another women, but his own sister... A large part of her felt confident that she could separate it enough in her mind, to see it as his simply having an insanely jealous and possessive ex girlfriend and children who had been adopted out that he made the effort to be around for regardless. Even that was still quite a thing to ask someone to accept.... But she had never known anyone who could make her feel like this either. Especially considering he had managed to make her feel like it so quickly.

The moment she realised what Cersei was saying, all she wanted was challenge her for trying to take what was hers. Regardless of if it was true or not. In that split second she decided that she was having him, consequences be damned. So that was it. She would process and deal and hear his words. But she would accept it at the end of the day. Because all she wanted was him.

——————

“So? What WAS that about Sugar Ray?” Sansa jolted into awareness at the bouncing of her brothers body, jostling her and bumping her slightly as he flopped into the sofa in the smaller family living space of their wing. She didn’t even remember walking there. And she was desperately confused. But she could feel that her face had been cleaned and ointments applied to the scratches. And apparently she was alone with her siblings. “You checked out for a bit Sans. Not quite catatonic, but ahh... Not really in there either. Once Aunt Cat had you patched up, we brought you in here.” She blinked rapidly, processing and filing Jon’s words away. That explained why she had no clue what was going on. And the fact that she had done it when Joffrey beat her black and blue, her family had known what to do too, and knew not to panic. They didn’t know there had been far more occasions of her doing it than that though. It had just been so long that she hadn’t realised it was happening.

She licked her lips and smiled sheepishly. “Sorry guys. What did you ask Robb?” Her big brother pulled her in for a cuddle and laid a smacking kiss to her head. “S’alright lil’ lady! We got you! I asked what happened with Cersei?” She sighed heavily and nodded against his shoulder. She wouldn’t lie to them, but they didn’t need to know everything either. “Ahhh. Well? She was a little upset that I was... That Jaime and I...” She scrunched her face up in embarrassment and flushed heavily. She might have decided to own the fact that they were a.... SOMETHING.... That didn’t mean it was at all comfortable for her to tell her siblings that she was sleeping with a man who had watched them all grow up either! “She took exception to you inviting Jaime into your tower so you could scale his? That’s a weird thing for a sister to care about!” If her face wasn’t so damned tender, her jaw just might have hit the floor at her sisters nonchalant statement. But it was, so she laughed instead. There was nothing else she could really do with a statement like that! “Damn! I bet Lannister isn’t small and inadequate! Not if even his own sister is after it! What IS the D-L there Sansiepants?”

“THEON!” She shrieked with laughter at his cocky head wiggle. And at Robbs dramatically indignant sniffling and faux insult. “What? He’s a pretty one! Bit old for me personally, and I’m a very happily married man thank you! Quit ya whining babe, you know I’m just ensuring I’m still in the lead for sexiest and most pleasing Stark mate!” Gendry and Ygrittes pointed coughs and snorts did NOT help her to gain control over her laughter either! Gods how she had needed this with her pack! Even if it was completely inappropriate. “Let it go Theon! You’ll have to settle for knowing she’s been well serviced - by the fact that she laid the smack down for it!” She giggled at Aryas still being well and truly hung up on the fact that she had hit the woman. It felt nice to have her so proud of her, even if it was for acting like a wildling. “Indeed. She didn’t like that Jaime and I are together or whatever... NOT because of what either of you implied - though you wouldn’t know for sure, she’s completely unstable. She still hates me as you all know... Blames me for everything. But tangling Jaime up or stealing his loyalty away from her or whatever was the cause. And when I pretty well laid claim to him as mine and told her I wouldn’t give him up because she demanded it? It was bitch slaps at high noon - the duel for the handsome prince!” Aryas maniacal cackling overwhelmed everyone else’s laughter. Which was EXACTLY what she was aiming for.

“So? Lannister? That really happening?” She smiled shyly up at her big brother and nodded. Hoping that his serious face wouldn’t lead to the judgements and disappointment she had told herself it would. But Robb just studied her face quietly. “Is it serious, or are you just.... And you HAVE to make it seem like it’s more than... Because you got caught?” She smiled ruefully and met her brother in laws eyes dangerously, his snorting at her brothers failure to say the words. “Not all of us were TOO drunk for drunk sex the other night.” It was worth it to see Theon double over in loud, obnoxious guffaws and crow his pride in her for it. She shook her head and sighed softly, focusing on her fingers as she did so. “It’s serious... But it’s complicated too. We... Haven’t really talk about it... But I guess from where I’m standing? We are together, but maybe having a break after we head out from here, to sort of... Figure our heads out a bit? It moved very fast.” Not one of them found issue with anything she said. Not a single one of them. They just nodded, or shrugged or smiled at her. Bran even went so far and told her in straight out words that he’d have accepted a man three times her age, if he could make her smile as Jaime does, So twenty years and a FEW potential complications were nothing. A FEW?! She had panicked for DAYS over nothing! Well not NOTHING! They still had to deal with his non children who doubled as her friends and his crazy sister and the fact that they live so very far apart and all those other normal obstacles people face too. AND any potential awkwardness ensuing from the possibility of a bad break up.... But some of her BIGGEST issues - NOT THE BIGGEST it turns out! Weren’t issues at all. She’d made mountains out of molehills. And for as annoying as that was to learn? She was so infinitely grateful to have such loving family all around her, to accept her choices.

——————

She spent the rest of the day in the caring, yet overbearing presence of her siblings. More than half of whom should have been on the road by lunch time. Not that a single one of them minded at all, if anything they were offended by the notion that anything could be more pressing than smothering her and secretly hanging about to see how the Baratheon/Lannister drama would unfold. Of course it was unkind of her to make it seem like they were more concerned with the gossip, because that wasn’t at all the case. It was pretty obvious that they were as overwhelmed by Cersei’s outburst and the ensuing drama as everyone else was - though definitely not as hurt as she had been. Or the woman’s family themselves. They also weren’t the only ones who’s departures were cancelled. She didn’t know what that meant for everyone’s plans for work and school and such but perhaps she wasn’t actually supposed to notice that? It was sweet of them truly, and she was grateful that she had an extra day with them all too. It was just that she wanted to be alone. She had wanted to disappear upstairs into her tower, maybe take a shower and wrap herself up in the shirt of Jaimes that she had attempted to wear to bed the night before, and her blanket, and either curl up on the sofa or the recliner or even perhaps the bed that had been claimed for she and Jaime, and go to sleep.

She had napped anyway, but she had done so with her head on her sisters shoulder and her feet in her cousins lap, when they decided that watching the ‘ultimate Christmas movie’ together for the ten thousandth time was entirely appropriate, even more so if they spent a small fortune on a ridiculous amount of pizzas and bread and pasta sides all the way from the big pizzeria in Darry and had it delivered over an hour up the road, so that they could laze about with an ‘early dinner’. They were ridiculous of course, it was actually lunchtime or there abouts, when they had made that claim, but it had been nice too, to be well ensconced in the safety of the bosom of her favourite people. The full belly and the pain killers her mother deemed necessary that she have, and the relaxed atmosphere around her, not to mention her lack of sleep the night before and all of the drama of the day, had lulled her into dozing off quietly before John McClane had scrunched his toes in the carpet on the screen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not going to lie, this single chapter was slapped together purely so I could show Aryas pride in Sansa fighting back. Hopefully it’s not as rushed and clunky to read as it felt writing it.


	13. Chapter 13

SUNDAY NIGHT.

He was an asshole. He always had been, and usually it didn’t bother him at all that he was. So there was no real point denying it. No one made him come to The Riverlands this year, in fact it was actually expected that he wouldn’t. No one really thought too heavily on the fact that he and Tyrion continued to come back even after Cersei stopped coming herself. Their places there had just sort of, become expected over time. He knew he had come for Myrcella afterwards, but everyone else had accepted that The Baratheon portion of the ‘family’ had swelled to become The Baratheon/Lannister and occasional Tyrell portion. This time had been different. He had claimed that he had come to be there for Myrcella and Tommen, because they wouldn’t ask it of him, and he had implied to Sansa that his Father had encouraged his presence there. But the reality was that he came because of her. He had been more than happy to let Tyrion be the one to be on hand for his niece and nephew should they need it. Right up until the moment he found out that the girl he had developed a crush on, like some randy teenager, would be there.

And it HAD paid off. Granted, he didn’t ever expect to actually have a shot with her, and he certainly never expected that nearly everyone would accept such a thing either. He hadn’t even really planned on trying to have a shot with her. In his mind, this weekend had been an opportunity for him to be a lecherous, despicable old reprobate. He meant to actually be friendly too, of course! It wasn’t an unreasonable thing to hope for, he had been friendly with her siblings for years and she was friendly with his brother and niece and nephew. And if he happened to have the chance to stare at her perfect ass in a bikini? That was just a bit of a bonus really. 

But now he knew, that if he had maybe just asked her out at any other point in time - maybe even spoken to her parents about doing so first so she wouldn’t have balked about the idea? Even if it was a little outdated and ridiculous in his mind, to ask permission, Lady Sansa likely would have found it romantic rather than antiquated like he did. Maybe he could have talked to Cell first and explained that he had developed a fondness for her friend, let her get used to the idea. - Developed a fondness? He wasn’t THAT fucking old!

Not that any of it mattered! He could play what if’s, all he liked. That wasn’t how it happened. It was just a little frustrating to know that it COULD have happened in a much cleaner way. Maybe in a way that didn’t result in his sister lashing out like the lunatic she was, and busting his girlfriends face up in the process. Maybe in a way that didn’t have her blowing his one chance at explaining his past to her himself. Maybe she wouldn’t be set to spend only the Gods know how long in the high security section of the private psychiatric hospital high in the mountains of The Westerlands, because she attacked his girl. He knew she needed it. They all knew she needed it. Her doctors had even advised that she be admitted into full time care, at least until they helped her mourn and move on from losing Joffrey. If she ever did. And yet, it was still confronting that it would now be forced upon her.

But Cers was the Queen of manipulation too. Robert had been in complete denial about the severity of her issues. Because she knew if she played him just right, he would believe her to be back to herself and he wouldn’t notice her not taking her medication and drinking far too much instead and throwing their effectiveness out the damned window. Her learning to manage her conditions had never happened, because she didn’t believe that there was anything actually wrong with her and because Robert hadn’t been any better, because he didn’t want there to be anything wrong, even though he understood that there was.

But he was an asshole, and this time he actually hated that he had been forced to be so. His Father had known the things she said to Sansa, because she had snarled and hissed about it when he forced her into the lounger away from everyone. He could have lied about it and put it all on her, claimed her rants were delusions and that they were part of why he had started avoiding her. It was the smart thing to do. But a very long time ago, he had promised to love her and only her for his whole life. To protect her above all others. So when his Father asked him straight out, if there was any possible truth to her claims... He had been a completely different type of asshole and confirmed that yes, there had been times when he depended on the comforting arms of his sister to deal with his own issues. Idiot that he is, couldn’t stomach putting it all on her and her mental instability. Of course that would be what everyone else believed, if it ever got out further. His Father had even determined that it was best to explain to Robert that she had suffered the delusion from time to time, her mind playing tricks on her and making their close sibling bond seem like something else entirely in her mind. As far as he would know, THAT was the reason he had put distance between them. In the hopes that without his close proximity to her, the delusion wouldn’t have a chance to truly take hold of her mind.

But he had never once in his life witnessed such true disgust and disappointment and disbelief on his Fathers face. The Great Lion had been disappointed in him plenty over the years, but never like that. He explained that he had always thought it was the bond with Cersei that kept him single for so long. But that he had never ever would have suspected that he wasn’t actually single all those years, because of Cersei. So Jaime had down played it a little too. Claimed that it wasn’t actually all the time. That it was a weakness that he hadn’t been able to shake until he refused to excuse Joffreys violent behaviour towards Sansa. Not that it mattered all that much - the damage was done.

He was a right fucking prick! Because instead of letting the one person who truly did deserve his anger and frustration and hate, take the full weight of it as pay back for the way she had disregarded and hurt his niece and nephew and YES - Sansa too? He had hurt his Father. Because apparently it wasn’t enough that he had one child trying to push him into an early grave. And Jaime was a self destructive fool STILL when it come to trying to protect his sister! Tywin Lannister wasn’t an easy man to love, he wasn’t an easy man to impress either. But he did love him and respect him and he never wanted to be an actual disappointment to him either. His Father was a God amongst men, and he had shattered the pedestal that he had always place him on, because of his need to save her in whatever small way he still could.

He certainly hadn’t objected to his Fathers ‘just in case she makes it public knowledge’ plans though. He had spoken to Robert about her delusions of a romantic connection between them and that being the catalyst for his distance. And he had given his word, that outside of potential family situations that he couldn’t avoid, he was more than happy to basically disown her. Plus he had to not fuck it up with ‘that wonderful girl you don’t deserve Jaime.’ Those conditions hadn’t been the least bit difficult to give. Though telling Robert that his sister, his wife, had ‘attempted to seduce him’ a few times was awkward. Far more awkward than her successfully doing so for somewhere around two decades had been, that was for sure and certain. Watching the poor bastard pale and grimace and even sort of apologise for not understanding just how bad she had suffered, and those around her as a result, had NOT been nearly as satisfying as he once might have thought it would. If anything? It made him sick to his stomach with guilt. But it was just deserts too wasn’t it? If he had have kept his cock away from his sister in the first place? None of these dramas would be happening now.

Jaime jumped and swung around at the feel of something brushing his back. And then he frowned hard and blinked rapidly as he tried to process what was happening. Blindly reaching out and taking the proffered mug and to straighten the soft woollen shawl that had been draped over him in a very awkward and nervous gesture. He knew what it was. He was just struggling with the why, and rather more than a touch uncomfortable. “Mind if we sit?” He stared stupidly at the Stark Patriach and the Matriarch - Of this particular branch of Starks at least! And waved awkwardly to the lounger he was perched on the very edge of. He had been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t noticed really, the beauty of the night around him. The soft gurgling of the black waters around him, the fullness and brightness of the moon above, the twinkle of thousands of stars overhead, looking a bit like someone had dropped a whole pot of glitter over inky black paper. But he noticed it now, and was more than a little amused and a lot uncomfortable that he was sharing it with these two people. “You know? A soldier like myself? I’ve pictured dying a rather unhealthy amount of times in my life.... Never would it have occurred to me that I may well be thrown in The Green Fork and held down by Catelyn Tully-Stark. I HAVE imagined you shooting me Stark. If you’re curious.”

He grinned playfully and shook his head, adjusting HIS blanket around his shoulders and sipping at the cup of steaming tea in his hands, as the pair laughed quietly beside him. “Don’t give me a reason to, now that I have cause to keep eyes out for one. And we will get along just fine.” He snorted at the idea of he and Ned actually getting along. There was a laugh! Sure! They didn’t hate each other necessarily. And there wasn’t any real animosity there, - there had been once upon a time. But over time they had sort of gotten to know each other better and that had faded into this weird sort of grudging acceptance. In recent years that had even become almost amicable, grudging acceptance. But they were hardly what one might call ‘friends’. Jaime didn’t have friends really. He DID but none he would consider close like he was with Tyrion for example - of course he was his brother, so it hardly counted. “And here I was thinking that your reason for watching for a reason, was reason enough.” The man huffed a small, breathy laugh and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, mirroring Jaimes own seat. “You know something Lannister? In the years I’ve known you, there is ONE thing I have always admired about you - even back when you were an arrogant, swaggering, cocky bastard who I did actually visualise shooting from time to time.”

He let his signature cocky smirk crawl across his face slowly as he cocked his head in arrogant question. Ned Stark admiring him for anything was a fucking laugh and a half! “Mmm. See... Even back then? YOU were very vocal about women being just as capable as men. Just as deserving of respect. Their opinions just as important... Of course, you have always had this arrogant hero complex too! You WANT to protect and save and serve, but you respect a woman’s right to do and feel the same. So it surprises me a bit, that you would be so concerned with our opinions. Sansas approval is the one you need, not ours.” He laughed softly. Who would have picked that? He certainly would not have done so before this morning. But the man had almost shamed his own ‘brother’ for thinking it his place to involve himself in his daughters relationship. “It is actually rather amusing that you would mention my apparent feminist approach to life today of all days Stark! Those thoughts come from a lifetime spent beside a headstrong sister who was determined to do everything I could do, better than I could do it. Of course the premise is still there and it’s still important. But she’s a basket case and not at all a poster girl for the importance of equality between the sexes.”

“Perhaps she isn’t the best example, no. But the point is, Jaime - that you of all people should understand our stance on trusting Sansa to know her own mind enough to live her life on her terms.” Catelyns smiling down at her own mug and tracing the lip of it as she spoke in soft tones, reminded him so much of her daughter in that moment that his heart gave an uncomfortable pang over it. “Sansa has made some poor decisions in her rather short life Jaime. But each and every one of them has been a lesson that she has come back stronger and smarter from. She has had her confidence stripped away by enough people to last her a lifetime. We need to trust her and support her, not question her judgement or forbid her seeing someone because he happens to be a bit older and a little like a pseudo uncle type of figure.” He groaned dramatically and glared at the woman pointedly, making her husband laugh quite a bit. “Best have a care with that love, apparently the word Uncle makes him uncomfortable here.” He sighed in exasperation and laughed with a little bit of self deprecation. If only they knew! A daughter and son who call him uncle because technically he’s that too. A girlfriend who was once his late son/nephews poorly treated punching bag of a girlfriend, who also happens to call him Daddy in bed. Uncomfortable didn’t even begin to cover what being sort of dubbed made him!

“Look.” He paused and took a fortifying breath and focused on the mug in his hands, more than a touch uncomfortable. But they HAD been frank with him. They deserved no less from him in return. “I... Umm... I did NOT come here intending on starting anything with Sansa, I do actually need you to believe that.... I did come here knowing that I already saw her differently than I had previously too. It was never my intention and I actually wish that I had realised it was a possibility that she might have an interest there too - before we made a bit of a mess of it. I’d have done this very differently had I realised. But I do appreciate that you have no objections, and I respect that more, because it isn’t me you are giving that approval too, but her. And hey? If today’s DRAMATICS haven’t scared her away completely? I’m not sure I’ve got worse in me? Though I still have yet to worked out how I made her cry this morning? So I guess I could stuff it royally yet?”

“I shouldn’t tell you? But Tyrion was right, that was as painful to watch as a train wreck Lannister! It’s not what you did wrong but what you did right that had her running away. You know it well, no man has ever treated her right, you doing so, as well as you did, startled her is all. You made her THINK.” He scoffed and stared at them both in disbelief as they smiled at him like a pair of know it all parents. And then he laughed. For as stupid as that was, it made perfect sense too. He knew she was holding back and he knew she was skittish. He also knew her feelings for him extended well beyond friendship and wonderful sex. He also now knew that she wanted him, dangerous, disgusting flaws and all - at least she had when her adrenaline had been up earlier. But he had assumed he was projecting to much on her when she wasn’t in the same place as he was, not that she had been scared about his being too good for her to understand and be comfortable with! 

“Seven hells! That girl is going to turn my hair grey before I ever actually get to asking her out! Which I will do at some point in time just so you are aware.” Ned actually let out a loud bark of laughter at that and clapped his shoulder as he sat up again. “And now you can even tell her you approached me with your intentions and feed into the romance a bit. But I warn you now? I don’t EVER want nor need to know or see anything about your private business with her! The stubble rash and love bites and the terrible cover story were bad enough. Make sure it’s never worse than that or your fantasy of me shooting you might just come true!” He choked on a bark of laughter himself and actually blushed a little at that. More than just a little bit uncomfortable knowing they understood he had been fucking her before dinner that night. Grateful beyond belief for that stubble rash hiding the truth of ‘the love bites’ too! “I can agree to that. I’d wring someone’s neck if they thought to share intimate details of Myrcella with me - and she’s my niece not my daughter.”

“Just so! You should go and talk to her Jaime. You are both headed home in different directions tomorrow and from what I understand, there are still some pretty significant complications for the two of you going forward. If you don’t mind taking some advice? Maybe someone who has been happily married for nearly three decades might be a good person to hear? TALK. Be honest and don’t make assumptions. And ask the same of her. AND I’ll ask that if you mean for this to be... Your happy ending, and hers? Cherish her as she deserves.” Jaime blew out a long, shuddering breath and nodded in silent thanks for the words of advice, and in agreement with what she had asked. He couldn’t guarantee anything. And not just because he couldn’t predict the future, but also because he knew she needed time to decide if he was worth it after today. 

He smiled in confusion as the pair of them strolled back towards the manor again, arms around each other and just enjoying each other - because they could.... To say he hadn’t expected it, would be a rather ridiculous understatement. To say he wasn’t impressed with their ballsy move in approaching him would be no less. And to say he wasn’t grateful for it and for being given opportunity to see another side of them - one he could truly respect, would be an outright lie. He wanted what they had. That contentment and comfort. That partnership. And that obvious love. And he wanted it with her.

TEXT TO RED:

Are you sleeping?

TEXT FROM RED:

Are you coming to bed? Or do you fancy waking cold and alone on the dock more?

TEXT TO RED:

It wouldn’t be cold necessarily? I have MY blanket thanks to your mother. But I would much prefer to sleep with my girl if she’ll have me?

TEXT FROM RED:

Come to bed please.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I sorry? Not even a little bit. Because we are all a little mad here!

BARELY MONDAY MORNING:

There were a lot of moments in her life that Sansa wished her Uncle Jon could be beside her. For guidance or support. To know his thoughts. To hear his strong but warm voice. Sometimes she wished he was there purely so that she could hug him. She wondered what he would think of the circumstances she found herself in now. He had once sworn to her, on bended knee and all! That she was his Little Lady and that her tower was a safe and special place for her. One that he would guard like a terrifying ogre against anyone unworthy of her. And of course she knew it was fantastical and a bit ridiculous of her to put so much stock into it. She knew the tales and songs weren’t real. That life was not a Disney movie. But she couldn’t help but feel that there was something very telling about the fact that she hadn’t hesitated to lead Jaime Lannister into the one place where her dreams of love and magic and romance had always been allowed to be. Of course she had been drinking too, so her inhibitions were depleted, but she was one to buy into the notion that alcohol also made one honest. She had allowed him up there, when it hadn’t really occurred to her to do the same for any other. Harry she probably would have eventually - but that was also symbolic, because he had no interest in visiting Ruby Fort with her for her to make that mistake.

The little girl inside of her wanted to believe it was a sign from the universe or fate. She wanted to believe that only he had been worthy. That maybe, her Uncle Jon was keeping his word, by guarding her tower and her heart from those whom he didn’t believe deserving of his little Lady. It was a beautiful thought. It was also completely silly. She had idolised her Uncle - put him on a pedestal of impossible standards, because he was always wonderful to her. But she did understand that he was just a man too. He was human and he did have flaws. If he was watching over her, like she desperately hoped he was? He would know the things that Jaime had done, the man he had been for most of his life. And she doubted very much that he would be forgiving of such. He certainly wouldn’t entrust HER to a man of such sins. Not without knowing with complete certainty, that those same sins would never and could never touch her. Not without believing with absolute conviction that he had changed and grown and learned and repented. Maybe that was the point. Maybe her uncle was watching, and did know that Jaime was redeemable. Maybe she was meant to be the one to help save him - but to do so, he had to also epitomise the fairytale knight she had always dreamed of, in every other way? It was silly and naive of her to justify it to herself like that... But her Uncle Jon had always been indulgent of her fancies too. He had always encouraged her to believe that life could be magical. It was a bit ridiculous, because she was a grown woman, with very real lessons of harsh reality under her belt. So much so, that she had become a bit jaded, and disenchanted of that fairytale life. She hadn’t wanted to come this weekend because of it. And yet she had anyway. Only to be faced with the possibility of that kind of love.... But not without plot twists. Plot twists that made said potential fairytale life, a bit dark and twisted too.

She had watched him, sitting out on the dock, lost and alone with his thoughts. And she wondered if he had been thinking of her like she was thinking of him. Or if maybe he was thinking on all of the moments of pain he had weathered himself that day. Or maybe his mistakes and sins? Did he view them as such? Or did he justify them to himself? And then she had watched as her parents sought him out. As her mother laid her blanket over his shoulders and held a mug of something out to him.... Just as she had done that morning. She watched as they talked, as her father laughed and clapped his shoulder in an affectionate manly way. There she was wondering about signs from the universe or the heavens or the Gods, only to be faced with the most obvious sign that could be. It didn’t matter if her Uncle Jon could or would approve of her loving Jaime Lannister. Her Uncle Jon wasn’t beside her to tell her what he thought. But her parents were. And they didn’t simply accept it, they actively encouraged it. Not even Harry, whom they believed she would one day marry, had ever been afforded her parents advice and care, as Jaime was being afforded before her very eyes. And considering they knew of the potential complications - not ALL of those complications of course, and thank the Gods! They knew it was complicated and messy, and they also KNEW that their relationship consisted of a couple of days of sneaking around. And they were hardly naive enough to believe it had been completely innocent. Yet they seemingly believed it to be important that they show support... Whether it was support of their relationship directly, or if it was support for what he had weathered himself that day, and they offered it as friends, or if that offer was extended because they saw him as family now that they believed him to be hers? She didn’t really know. Though her mother had given him her blanket too? And that was a rather telling gesture too.

It was moot. Her Uncle couldn’t ever give her the approval she craved, but her parents could and from the looks of it, they were doing so. She hadn’t ever, couldn’t ever have predicted that they would accept it. They didn’t even LIKE Jaime. They TOLERATED Jaime. Their relationships had grown more comfortable from what she remembered them being when she was younger, but she would never have believed they would HAPPILY accept him for her. She had ‘known’ they had accepted it already, her mother had basically told her they did. But she had thought maybe they just didn’t want to rock the boat too much too. Not after her terrible track record with choosing mates and not when they had to know that their relationship started and was built on their sleeping together. It meant so much to witness that moment, to know it happened. She didn’t need to hear their words, that wasn’t her business. Their body language told her all she needed to know of it. The rest was between them. But it was... Freeing to know that her choices hadn’t hurt them in anyway.

——————

Jaime was just coming through the doors to HER private wing when she laid eyes on him. It was a greater distance for him to have crossed the lawn and made his way in and around the manor to come through her doors, but she had needed a few extra moments to gather herself. She was so nervous that she felt like her heart might actually explode in her chest, it was beating so hard and so fast. It was a bit dramatic and silly of her, they had been sleeping together for a couple of days! They had even been rather more lover like about it than would be considered the norm for a fling. And she knew now what she felt too. But it was different. And not just because they had both admitted they wanted more together, but also because of the weight of everything they would need to wade through to actually be together properly too. And when he looked at her like he wasn’t truly sure of his welcome, only to have it flicker immediately to anger and pain as he scrutinised her injured face? Her own fears were abated somewhat and she stepped straight into his body and wrapped her arms around him. 

He let out an almost pained groan as his arms wound around her back and crushed her hard up against him, and it felt wonderful. “Are you sure you want me to stay tonight?” She let out a huffing sob like breath and nodded against his jaw. Of course he would ask her that. It was just so Jaime, to need her to clarify her wants to him, so he knew she wasn’t doing something because he wanted it when she didn’t in truth. How she ever thought she might handle giving him up, she would never know. Now she had to just pray that she could find her way past his past and her trust issues too. “You wouldn’t be here if I didn’t need you with me tonight.” He only squeezed her tighter and pressed his lips hard to her temple, his breaths coming ragged and harsh to tickle through her hair. Telling her that she was correct in her hopes that he needed her as badly. “I was going to tell you. I needed you to hear it from me, because I was going to tell you I couldn’t walk away in the morning.” He huffed a suspiciously wet sounding breath and kissed her head again quickly. “I was going to make you see that it wasn’t impossible and that I would do whatever I had to to get around it all for you... I was going to talk to Myrcella and Tommen once we were back in the city too.... I had... I was trying to work out how I admitted everything without making you hate me. Or scaring you off.” She smiled shyly against his neck and pressed a small kiss there. She needed to believe that. She needed to feel confident that he would have been honest with her if he meant to move forward with her. And at the same time, she hadn’t been sure that he actually did want to move forward with her like she had randomly decided she wanted when faced with someone claiming to be able to take him from her. Jealousy was apparently a good motivator. Jealousy and furious hatred and an ingrained need to protect.

“Come to bed? And we can hide away from the world together. YOU can tell me what you need me to know and we can pretend that I wasn’t already rather vulgarly taunted with it. Or we can just... You can talk to me about it or I can tell you about what she said or whatever. Please?” She pulled back enough to meet his glassy looking eyes, roving her own over his strong, handsome face as if to learn him anew. To know every single line with the eyes of a woman very much in love. No matter how hurt and confused she still was. She was genuine in her offer to pretend - just for tonight, so that he could have that, if that’s how the conversation unfolded... So they both could. 

She did empathise with the fact that the crazy lioness had taken that opportunity from him and from her to a lesser degree too she supposed. But she wasn’t capable of apologising for having been forced to hear it like that either. The consummate Lady inside wanted to offer that show of understanding, the snarling wolf was not having it. She had apologised enough for others, to last her a lifetime. And she was done being anybodies punching bag. Not that she thought him capable of treating her that way ever! But she was resolved to this new found strength and he would need to learn to respect it if he wanted to bring it all to the surface. He nodded in silent agreement with her suggestion and reached up to trace the bruising and scratches marring her face sadly. It was ugly and angry and awful to look at. She knew it and hated it. Taking the hit had been worth it, but she genuinely didn’t expect that level of violence in a single swing either! The worst was her eye, with the purpling lines dragging out from the corner, and the tiny cuts to that delicate skin there and the burst vessels around the entire corner of her eyeball itself. And was the most painful too. She had had a niggling headache because of it most of the day. “Come on Baby. I promise you may inspect my hurts as thoroughly as you need to, once we are laying down.... I just need to shut off lights and the heater upstairs and I’ll join you?”  
“Baby huh?”  
“Do you have a problem with that Ser?”  
“Absolutely not.”

———————

It was a little bit endearing to find him still dressed and sitting on the edge of the bed once she made it back to the bedroom. She had meant for him to actually get ready for bed, being that she only intended on kicking her sleep pants and socks off before doing so herself. Whilst he would have to strip almost completely now too. Clearly he wasn’t sure of himself there this night. Which she understood of course, but she also had to wonder if his submissive behaviour was more indicative of his relationship with his sister too? She shouldn’t speculate of course, but besides the spark of amused affection and pride his noting her wearing his shirt again caused? Her lion appeared far more broken than she ever thought possible. And it didn’t feel right at all. She anticipated the possibility of a little contrition and obviously a few nerves and maybe even actual guilt and a touch of self loathing - all seemed pretty obvious emotional responses for a man who’s lover had been attacked by a crazy ex and exposed to dark secrets of his past as a result. But Jaime looked defeated almost. And completely at her mercy.

She had actually spent far more time than was normal, analysing what sort of reactions would be normal for someone who actually understood that she had been hurt and her trust broken, by their actions. Because neither Joffrey or Harry had given her that. Neither had cared about her feelings - actually no? Joffrey had. He had WANTED her to feel worthless and he expected her to want to regain his favour because she was supposed to be shamed by failing to see to his needs. Harry just hadn’t seen anything wrong with what he had done. Yet Jaime? Who hadn’t actually acted poorly in anyway since she hit her head in the car that first day, who’s ‘crimes’ lay in a past he couldn’t change and who claimed to have planned to be honest with her about it all? Looked almost like he expected her to tear him down for it or something. And she did not like the unsettling feeling it left in the pit of her stomach.

Sansa stepped up to stand between his spread knees, pushing him to sit up from his gracefully slouched position of resting his elbows on his knees and watching her silently. Sighing happily at the feel of his warm hands nervously finding purchase on the backs of her bare thighs gently. Whilst his head lulled forward to rest against the hollow of her neck, with the insistence of her fingers combing into his long blonde hair. “Is there a reason you aren’t ready for bed yet Ser Jaime?” She grinned sheepishly at his startled huff of laughter and leaned in to kiss his jaw, awkwardly trying not to press too hard and push her raw cheek against him. “I’m just a bit lost in my head tonight baby. Hop in bed and I’ll strip off and join you.”

——————

“Alright... So? Confession time I guess huh? Do you mind at all if I start with some mildly embarrassing truths and then lead into the whole begging you to let me keep you forever speil and then if you still want to actually hear it... The Uhh... dark, disgusting sordid past?” Sansa smiled softly at him and tucked her hand under her uninjured cheek, giving him her full attention, despite his failure to maintain eye contact as he propped himself up beside her on his elbow and toyed with a lock of her hair in a rather obvious nervous gesture. “Go ahead... Please?” He cleared his throat awkwardly and laughed almost ruefully at himself. And her nerves were shot through from that alone. But she wanted him, she wanted them. They couldn’t even begin to think of moving forward without this discussion at the very least. “I...” He huffed shook his head. “No one made me come this weekend. In fact they all determined it far safer to not ask it or expect it... I was determined that I wasn’t coming... And then Cell spoke of her concerns about BOTH you and Cersei being here... I want to tell you that I changed my mind because I wanted to make sure she didn’t do something awful and ruin everything for everyone and so that I would be here to maybe help prevent that AND be available to Cella and Tom if she did lash out in anyway.... And that is true, but I’d have also trusted Tyrion to do that easily enough without my being stuck in my sisters presence for more than five minutes too.... I actually changed my mind... Because you were going to be here.”

She flushed awfully and stared at him. It made absolutely no sense. They weren’t at all close in anyway before Thursday? She barely even knew him before that! Not beyond passing familiarity from their lives orbiting the same family networks at any rate! “Why?” And then it was his turn to blush and actually scrunch his face up a bit in clear embarrassment. Who knew Jaime Lannister could feel embarrassed about anything? Let alone that it could bypass his arrogance to let show on his face! It was fascinating! And adorable. “Full disclosure? I’m a dirty old man and when I saw you at Robb and Theons wedding I was a little bit thunderstruck by how beautiful you had become... I had full intentions of behaving! I did! I just... The opportunity to actually get to know the woman you had become when I wasn’t looking AND again - full disclosure? The chance at seeing you in swimwear? Those were some fairly good bits of incentive.” She squeaked in shock and simply stared at his bashful smile with wide eyes. Completely unable to comprehend that he was telling her that he had... A CRUSH on her? “You didn’t even talk to me at the wedding Jaime! You could have asked me to dance or anything! But I barely got a hello! I was even talking to Tyrion for ages! You could have joined us! Or... That was nearly a year ago Jaime! And... You added me online - but you have never actually interacted with me there either! Are you actually being serious right now?” She nudged her head forward on the pillow, her smile threatening to split her face and her cheek actually burning a little at the pull, but she needed to see his eyes where he had hid them behind the hand that had been tangling in her hair.

He groaned in what she could only assume was the Jaime Lannister version of mortification, and she couldn’t help but giggle at him. There weren’t merely butterflies in her belly! They were clearly birds, to be causing such a flutter. “Ugh! Okay see? It took me around thirty six hours to go from ‘are you alright?’ To ‘I’m going to fuck you senseless if you call me Daddy again’! I WAS attempting to not be THAT GUY! I figured there was no chance that anything more than maybe our being actually sociable around each other, was a possibility, because I was being a lecherous old man! Amongst other more serious reasons of course. I didn’t even contemplate the possibility of us becoming such good friends at all let alone that fast. And not in a million years could I have predicted that first night with you.... I really hate myself now, for not asking you to dance then - though you had just been dealt a pretty significant blow romantically too.” She couldn’t help it, she gave into the bubbling giggles wanting to escape her throat and threw her arm around around him to pull him down into a hug. “I wish you had asked me to dance Jaime! Maybe I’d have asked to suck Your cock in return and we could have already dealt with the dramas and had a whole year together!” She laughed again at his petulant grumbling and at his cheekily smacking her bum for teasing him so. She couldn’t help herself. It was just such a foreign concept to see him thus! “I like you too.”

His snorting only served to set her off again, until he was forced to laugh with her and seek his revenge for her teasing by kissing her until she stopped and sighed into his mouth. “Does your amusement at my pathetic behaviour mean I don’t have to put forward my begging arguments to convince you to never leave me?” She smiled almost sadly at the nervous tension in his voice, and pushed his hair out of his face gently to trace his features reverently. He was so handsome. And he wanted to be hers. He was also even more broken than she was. “I was afraid that I’d get attached to you you know? I knew when I woke up with you the other morning that... Our continuing to sleep together would make me want more. And I stupidly thought that if it was just the sex and friendship than maybe I could accept it as just that.... I thought that no one would accept us actually being together, and I thought it would make me look like one of those social climber types chasing the rich older man - if it become public knowledge and I figured it would end badly because all my relationships do, and I didn’t want to cause all the drama for us to be together and then have it happen again even worse when it ended. I didn’t want Myrcella to hate me.... AND I just didn’t want to deal with Cersei at all. I knew if she found out she would lose it and probably end up having another break down, and again... I worried about Myrcella hating me for causing that too.” She paused and sucked in a weary breath and studied his eyes, enjoying the feel of his fingers combing through her hair gently and the complete attention he was giving her. “And now?” 

She huffed an embarrassed, almost sad laugh. It had been an utterly horrid day and her heart hurt as much as her head did because of it. But it had started out so perfectly... Because of him. “I took off crying because I realised that I didn’t want to give you up. Because you are annoyingly perfect for me. And it scared the hell out of me. AND THEN I run into Cersei... And... Gods! She was so awful. She didn’t even hesitate Jaime. She said you were finally in a position to strangle me for killing your son but you were a weak fool for being too caught up fucking me as you did so, to actually get the job done.” She ignored his harsh cursing and devastated deflation and breathed harshly herself, the upset and anger washing over her again, because of the pain in every single line of his face. “And I snapped. I wanted to rip her throat out. She was threatening YOU. Speaking so awfully about you. And I just couldn’t let her, because you were mine and even if it was true, I wasn’t letting her steal you from me! In a blink I went from running away from what I thought we couldn’t have, to taunting a mentally unstable woman who has made claims about wishing me dead more than once... So you DON’T have to convince me of anything Jaime - not in that regard... Time and space and explanations and complete honesty? Those are what I need to get to a place where we can move forward. But I meant it. I wasn’t letting her either take or break my man. I wasn’t letting her hurt him or his niece and nephew by possibly making the mistake of speaking about such things to someone who WON’T protect you all from what it could mean. So I taunted her and then led her towards the kitchen. And I’m not sorry that I did.”

Her heart was in her throat as he stared at her incredulously. Maybe she had said to much. Maybe it would anger him that she meant to force his Father and Robert into having her committed for the foreseeable future, potentially indefinitely. And the longer he stared at her without talking, the more terrified she become that she had reached too far. “You manipulated her into hitting you where someone would see it, so that my Father would have her locked away, where her words couldn’t hurt me and the children I should have never fathered?” She grimaced and shrunk in on herself at his furious tone. And her heart thudded so painfully in her chest. “Seven fucking hells Sansa! He would have done so without a violent outburst! The things she said, the TRUTH she brought to the surface? That was enough for him to make sure no one will ever believe it, even if she does speak on it with someone else! I can’t believe you let her hit you! Are you insane?” She glared hard at him and shoved his hand away! He obviously didn’t understand AND she would NOT tolerate him speaking to her like she was stupid! Not after he had helped her understand that she shouldn’t take that sort of treatment! “I did it in the hopes that NO ONE but you and I would know she spoke on that! I did it, because her being a danger to others, means that she is forced into the appropriate level of care AND help for her very obvious issues! - Without your Dad having to wonder if YOU had ever crawled between your TWIN SISTERS THIGHS! - Without ANYONE staring at two people I have adored as friends and family too, my whole life - to see if there is anything remotely wrong with them, because maybe, just maybe, they are the product of incest! My getting hit by psychopaths isn’t exactly fucking new to me Jaime! And I’d do it again to protect YOU from your own sick past if I had to!”

Sansa narrowed her eyes dangerously and shoved at him. The arrogant bastard had rolled on top of her and all but pinned her to the bed and it had her ready to snap her jaws at him. It took her a moment to register that the low, rumbling, angry noise was coming from her own throat. “My Father already knew you beautiful, incredible, silly little fool! She was still lost to her own ramblings when he pulled her away. He KNOWS. And you should stop wiggling.” Her lips curled into a dangerous snarl of their own accord. It was like she had absolutely no control over her body at all! Gods what this man could pull from her! “You should get off me!” And then he almost smiled, but it was a dark, dangerous pull of those wonderful lips that could do such amazing things to her. “Stop wiggling Little Wolf or what little control I have left will snap and we will be fighting and fucking for dominance and not actually talking.” She let out a harsh noise of frustration and wrapped her knees up around his hips, throwing all of her weight against him, flipping him onto his back beneath her. And in that moment she was just too proud and too damned angry to admit that she only managed it because she caught him off guard. “I was trying to protect what is MINE! You arrogant ass of a man! Why not let him think her delusional! That’s what he will say if she ever manages to open her stupid, crazy mouth again anyway! Why let her madness hurt your relationship with him?!”

“Fuck me you’re beautiful!”  
“WHY JAIME?” His stupid smirk made her want to hit him, and she might have done so had he not snatched her wrists to pull her down on top of him by holding them above his head. “Good genes I suspect.” She growled again and panted in an attempt to catch her breath. She was on fire, and she wanted to hit and bite and kick him as much as she wanted to kiss him. The fact that he was as hard as could be under her was NOT helping her to get control of herself at all! “Why what? What are you really asking me right now hmm? Why tell my Father that there was truth behind her words? Maybe because I’m a self destructive fool! Maybe a part of me knew that he needed to know in case it did come up and someone, somehow got hold of MY children’s DNA somehow? Or WHY did I fuck my sister for more than half my life? That’s because I stupidly believed myself in love with her and because she was always possessive and manipulative and I was a fucking naive child when it started as experimentation? And then I was a basket case myself the first time I put a bullet in some random strangers brain because his name was on a list of enemies of Westeros? And even though we hadn’t actually been together for years at that point? I turned to her because she was a soft landing and the kind of madness that I understood! And maybe part of me always knew that she would scare anyone I might have an interest in off long before it could be more, so why fucking bother fighting it? Maybe you’re asking WHY I risked having children with her? I fucking didn’t! I didn’t even KNOW until Joffrey died and the allergy testing Tyrion and I had done on the others to help them grieve gave them someone other than Roberts blood! I was the obvious answer wasn’t I? You want your answers? Take your fucking pick sweetheart!”  
“I already did you ass! I PICKED YOU!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So apparently I am having a hard time letting go, and my planned ending is being extended? I’m not sorry for that either!


	15. Chapter 15

MONDAY MORNING: THE SMALL, DARK HOURS.

A better man might have been able to stop himself, but he’d already established that he was a shit person and she HAD just claimed that she wanted him anyway. He pushed her wrists together and held them both in his left hand, freeing up his right to spear into her hair, pulling her glorious, snarling mouth down to his harshly. There wasn’t really anything else to say in that moment anyway, though there was a hell of a lot left that needed saying, neither of them were in the right frame of mind anymore. Hells! He hadn’t been since she shoved his hand away and started growling at him! She was magnificent in her fury and he had never wanted anyone as much as he wanted her - needed her in that moment. 

It was messy and harsh, all clashing teeth and bitten lips and sucking and rough licking and it was wonderful. There was a small niggle in the back of his mind that he should be more gentle, that surely her face was hurting. But he was too far gone and she was perhaps even more lost than he, and then any potential thought was lost to sensation as his beautiful girl rolled herself over the throbbing length of his cock. He released her wrists at her insistent tugging and gripped her ass cheeks instead bucking up against her and tearing his mouth from hers to bite and lick his way down her neck. He wanted to devour her. He wanted her to devour him. More than anything he wanted her to possess him and stake her claim over him in the most primal way possible.

“Show me She Wolf. Take me and make me yours. Remind me who I belong to?” The growl she let out at his grumbled, panted words sent electricity shooting along his every nerve and had him twitching painfully against her undulating hips. And then he was in her hand and she was sliding down his length hard and fast. Apparently there was no time for stripping off, which was a good thing because he had no patience either. She had done no more than shove his sweatpants down and her panties to the side. And then she was riding him and he was pumping up to meet her roughly, slapping her ass and biting at her collarbone and the hollow of her throat. She was pulling his hair and gripping the headboard for leverage and her perfect little cunt was squeezing down over him every. Single. Time. She bottomed out. His girl, his wolf, his beautiful, glorious, passionate love. And he was done. No one had ever or could ever feel so good to him. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and held her, babbling praise and panting into her ear as she cried out and clenched and fluttered around him and he roared as she dragged him behind her, milking his entire length of every single drop he had. It was messy and it was rough and if she was going to fuck him into the bed like that every time he pissed her off? He’d be sorely tempted to do so on a regular basis, because his wolf was spectacular.

“I can’t feel my legs.” Jaime couldn’t help but laugh at the husky, breathless whisper she muttered against his sweaty neck. “You don’t need them anyway. I am more than agreeable to you staying exactly where you are for however long you need. Preferably forever.” She hummed and snuggled in against and overtop of him, practically purring when he stroked his hands reverently over her sweat dampened back to sneak up under the shirt she had claimed, to feel her smooth skin under his palms. The downside to not bothering to take the extra minute and strip. “Well that’s certainly one way to ensure that no one ever tries to take what’s mine.... Hardly a practical solution though.” Jaime snorted rudely and shuffled his head back slightly to take in her beautiful face. He nosed at her darkening, scratched up cheek and laid a gentle soothing kiss to the angriest mark. “I’m sorry I’m an ‘arrogant ass of a man.’ I’m not sorry for pointing out you’re a beautiful fool. Taunting her into hitting you was reckless Red.” He pushed in and kissed her pursed lips quickly, silencing her protest before it could fall between them. “Let me finish Baby, please?” She sighed softly and nodded. “I don’t want you getting hurt because of my idiotic mistakes. I love that you felt so protective over me and Cell and Tom, even HER. But I would take on the Herculean task of earning my Fathers trust and respect back over seeing that blow land every single day of the week. And I can promise you, that if I didn’t see it that way, than I wouldn’t deserve to call myself his son. Do you understand?”

She propped herself up onto her elbows to look down at him and he smiled softly when she leaned in to press a soft kiss to his lips and then the tip of his nose. “We aren’t going to actually agree on that Jaime. Your Father finding out something that could cause irreparable damage to your relationship, because you have decided to be honest with him of your own accord is one thing. Being forced to do so in such a vile way is another. And my hope was that no one would need to know the things she said to me. I’m not sure she wouldn’t have attacked me anyway. At least I got to stand up for myself finally.” He sighed heavily and closed his eyes. He could understand THAT desire well. Wanting to fight back. Even if he could never ever accept her allowing someone to physically hurt her so that she could make her point. THAT was self destructive and downright stupid and dangerous. But defending herself and yes, wanting to protect her lover? Those were things he could respect. Things could understand, because he would be the same himself. “Just how vulgar was she?” He swallowed hard and met her eyes again, he wasn’t sure he really wanted to know, and yet he did at the same time. Sansa cleared her throat softly and shook her head. “Are you sure you really want to know?”

“Not really... But I do want to know what YOU said? You really are very mean and very scary baby! And it’s fucking sexy!” He grinned at her adorable little scrunched nose and soft blush, and then he chuckled as she squeaked and bit her lip as he waggled his eyebrows. “She wanted to know if you ever say her name in bed with me... I told her everything you have called me in bed and emphasised that not one of those things were her name... And then she told me that eventually you would get bored with me and go back to her as you always do. That there wasn’t a single thing I could do for you or give you that she hadn’t already and because of it... You would never care for me as much as you do her... And I realised that the one thing I KNEW I could give you that she never had and never would... I could stop hiding and just be with you if you wanted to.” Panic and shame and hurt rushed over him in waves as he studied her nervous face. She wasn’t meeting his eyes anymore and he didn’t like it at all. She looked guilty and that scared the hell out of him. In fact he hated the implications of it far more than he cared a wit about any of his sisters disgusting claims. “We will come back around to the rest in a minute... I need to know if you.... Please tell me that you haven’t agreed to being more, having more with me, just to antagonise my sister.”

The furious and anguished look on her face near froze his blood in his veins. He had offended her? Good! He was feeling rather used and offended himself! In the worst possible way! “You really think me capable of that? That I would.... Use you like that? Disregard everyone around us and their feelings also? Just to get even with her? You have to be kidding me? I am NOT HER! My Gods!” He groaned and held tight as she shoved at him to get away. Of course she wanted to get away! She was a Stark and an infinitely good person and a consummate Lady for the Gods sake! Of course she wouldn’t do something so hurtful! To anyone - let alone him and those around them presently! He was an asshole. “I’m sorry! Seven hells! I just.... I had to know for sure! And... I mean? Let’s be fair here hmm? You gave every indication that you were done with me as of tomorrow morning at every opportunity. Just this morning, you were in tears because I was hinting at far more than you had asked for - than you made very clear you wanted! And seriously? I’ve twenty years on you sweetheart? Twenty year and a lifetime of really screwed up baggage! Is it so hard to believe that I might fear you don’t want me as much as I want you to?” His heart broke at the angry tears in her eyes. And Gods didn’t he hate that he had put them there. He hated that such pretty eyes ever showed such pain. “I. Have. Never. Wanted. Anything. More. In. My. Life. Than. I. Want. You.”

Jaime blinked rapidly at her words. Her quiet emphasis driving every single word home, right to his heart. There wasn’t a single lick of falsehood in her eyes. No guile. Just the Gods honest truth and his heart pounded hard inside his chest as he rolled with her, rearranging them on their sides, facing each other, so he could study her and breathe around the constrictions in his chest and throat, without having to let her go in anyway. “You want me? You are choosing me? No matter what anyone thinks or says? No matter the madness we caused in only a couple of days - despite our wishes to avoid exactly that! No matter the... No matter who I was for nearly my whole life? You actually want to be with me?” He felt sick, but he had to know. Without a single chance of a shadow of a doubt - he needed her to spell it out for him - AGAIN! Just to really drive it home. “Yes. You stupid, insufferable ass! I do! But I swear to the Gods! If you ever, ever think to ask clarification of my motivations, implying that I could be anything like that woman? I’ll do more than bite you during crazy sex games! Got it? That really hurt my feelings Jaime!” 

His smile was slow to appear, but it was no less wide for it. The relief coursing through him was ALMOST as overwhelming as the orgasm she had forced him into not even a full hour ago! “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to... You aren’t anything like her. And you don’t ever need to concern yourself with the bullshit she said to you either. Ever. Not even if she was to magically get better and be the woman I believed she was. The truth is Baby? She stopped being the person I actually wanted her to be a long time ago. It should never have happened and if it did? It should never have followed us into adulthood. I know that now and I’ve known it for years too. YOU are all I want... a long weekend? And frankly insane amounts of drama later? And I am all yours if you want me.” She smiled so sweetly over at him and snuggled into the pillow, shuffling herself until she was nose to nose with him. 

“I want you Jaime Lannister! I think maybe I have done so since you hit me over the head!” He scoffed indignantly and nipped at her chin playfully, more than a little amused by her cheek. “I didn’t hit you at all! I was genuinely concerned for your safety and mind thank you very much! All I did was tap on the window! The rest is on you love!” She was beautiful and sweet and all his. He loved her. Even if he was nowhere near ready to voice THAT! They had weathered far more emotional bullshit than was truly healthy already that day! And it would only get worse when they made their farewells in a few hours too. But he would enjoy this small, sweet interlude between the heavy and the crazed and the frankly destructive. And he’d hope that there were days of just this kind of easy, happy, teasing moments, and far less of the angsty teen drama bullshit moments coming their way. “Hey! I’ve taken enough blows to the head this weekend to see things the way I want thank you very much!”  
“THAT! Is NOT funny Sansa!”  
“Too soon? Ugh! FIIINE!” He snorted a bit of a wry laugh and shook his head at her, refusing to let her impish grin tease him into laughing properly. 

“What do you want to do from here Sansa? I know you need time and space.” He paused and sighed heavily, hating that it was so necessary. But the conversation needed to be started regardless of how he felt about it. “We also live rather far from each other?” He traced her sore face gently, rubbing at the perfect red arch over her black and swollen eye. Her sigh of contentment and the way it fluttered closed and stayed that way melting his heart just a little bit. She had to be utterly exhausted. He was, and he hadn’t been hit in the head either. It likely felt like heaven to close that eye and let it rest. “The physical distance will actually help to force the space and time to think I would think? This one weekend has been utter emotional chaos on us both Jaime.” He hummed in agreement as watched her teeter on the brink of sleep. Their talk of future plans could actually wait, but he was enjoying seeing her looking so damned sweet and mumbling about texting and calling and meeting up here in The Riverlands some weekends and even travelling to each other at times too, but initially it would need to wait until that space was enough to begin to move forward. He smiled softly and leaned in to press needy kisses to her forehead and breath her in, before he relaxed down into the pillow himself and let his exhaustion take him too. With her low, even breaths washing over his face and her delicate hand pressed to his heart. He didn’t ever want to fall asleep anywhere else. But he would wait however long she needed him to. He could give her that, if it meant he got this in return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m really not sure about this one at all. The end is near my darlings! At least the end of the weekend anyway! I hate Monday’s!


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We all hate Monday’s!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This time I am actually a little sorry!

WE ALL HATE MONDAY!

TEXT FROM ARYA:

Underfoot to Lady! Underfoot to Lady! We have clearance! The evil queen has LEFT THE BUILDING! I repeat! The evil queen has LEFT THE BUILDING! The Fort is clear and breakfast will be served with a side of NOT AWKWARD VERY SOON! Did someone say waffles? Yes someone did! Disregard if you are currently sexing it up with the hot old man - did I just? EWWW! But! Carry on - it is surgical separation day, so get it while you can! Tell him I uttered the term ‘hot old man’ and we become mortal enemies! Love ya!

TEXT FROM MARG:

SANSA LYANNA STARK! WHY AM I HEARING THAT YOU ARE BANGING JAIME HOT-AS-FUCK! FUCKING LANNISTER! AND THAT YOU APPARENTLY CAME TO FISTICUFFS WITH YOUR ARCH NEMESIS OVER YOU FUCKING JAIME HOT-AS-FUCK! FUCKING LANNISTER! FROM MY BROTHER? Gods! WHY DID I NOT COME WITH YOU THIS WEEKEND?! The ONLY acceptable reason to my hearing of this from Loras is that you are too busy getting busy to think of your darling best friend! I’ll be at your place with dinner and wine tonight! I want answers! And details! 

TEXT FROM MARG:

PS! Are you alright? And is Celly alright? Shit must be pretty weird there right? I love you, you total cliche! Wine! Dinner! Details! Much love darling!

“Mmm.... Follow my lead okay? First you type in G-O and then A-W-A-Y and then you hit send and put that down and come back!” Sansa giggled at her mans sleepily mumbled joke, and a little at his rolling after her and wrapping around her back to snuggle back into her warmth like a needy kitten! She established on that first morning that she woke him on the dock, that he was quite cute in his childlike befuddlement. But this was to a whole new level AND so much better than sitting out in the cold morning air drinking coffee with him! She could absolutely get used to waking up with him! And maybe - hopefully! That would be a reality that they could get to soon enough too. She didn’t bother replying to either her sister or her friend at all. They could wait. As Arya had so colourfully reminded her? She would be saying her goodbyes to him far too soon. So she would spend what she still could enjoying him instead of worrying over being polite.

“Good morning Baby.” He hummed happily and nuzzled at her nape, nosing his way through the absolute mess of her hair to press a firm kiss to the sensitive skin there as his hands explored her belly and chest under the shirt she was still wearing. “Morning Red... I’m conflicted on the good part.” The feel of his hand pausing and flexing over her ribs distracted her a little from his words and his lazy exploration of her neck and shoulder. She was sure he hadn’t even noticed that she noticed it, but even on normal mornings, where he was waking warm and in bed, his hand bothered him a little - likely from the inactivity during sleep, or something. It was possible he didn’t even notice it now - unless he was waking up cold like he did the other morning! She took his hand between her own and started massaging it gently and smiling at his pausing his own ministrations to take note of it silently. “Why are you conflicted?”

“What- Oh, that? Well? Because I can think of only two times - maybe three? That I’ve woken up quite this content... And I want to soak up every single second of it! BUT! I know it’ll be the last morning like this for a while too and I don’t want it to be... You are... That feels really good.” She smiled over her shoulder at him and sighed softly as he leaned in from where he had propped up slightly, to press a soft kiss to her lips, and brush his nose over hers affectionately. “Mmm. I noticed that it is tight in the mornings... And I’ll miss you too you know?” The small smile he gave her before stealing another kiss was enough to have her heart squeezing inside of her. “Good! The more you miss me? The better chance I have at a short break between visits hmm?” She laid his hand down on her belly and twisted to lay on her back against him so she could look up at him more comfortably, with a sigh. “Its what we both need Jaime.” He smiled sadly and nodded as his hand slipped back under the shirt to stroke at her skin again. “I know that Baby... SO! Who was stealing your attention away from me this morning and why?” She huffed a laugh at the reminder and traced a lazy hand up his ridiculously firm arm, enjoying being able to touch him so freely and not at all missing his change in directions.

“Apparently your Father has headed out already.” It seemed far less rude and also safer to avoid saying what she actually meant, and she was actually assuming also. But it was said the day before, that Tywin would be personally seeing his daughter directly to the hospital himself too. “Ahh! The wicked witch has left the building has she? Good to know... Though I did have the inside scoop on that anyway. My Father and Robert were taking her over, heading out at daybreak, and Renly was driving Roberts car back to Kings Landing for him.... I don’t know what Cella and Tom are doing yet - but I assume they will jump in with one of us heading that way. Probably Stannis and Shireen.” She hummed quietly in understanding and rubbed his arm and shoulder, partly in comfort, mostly because she just really couldn’t help herself. Stupid sexy shoulder! And from the look on his face, he knew exactly what she was doing too. “Also? Waffles for breakfast soon, and I’m in trouble with Margaery because she found out about everything happening here, from Loras.... Does Celly hate me very much do you think?” That was one thing that she hadn’t actually let herself think on. It scared her and upset her quite a bit to think that one of her best friends - the friend she had known longer than any other, barring only her own siblings of course. - Might just never speak to her again. Jaime sighed softly and cupped her neck lovingly, stroking at her jaw line gently. “Ahh... Well? I don’t know exactly how she feels right now... She was pretty petty and childish about it yesterday... BUT! I only actually got to speak to her right after everything too. It’s pretty fair that she wanted someone to lash out at. She will come around in time, if she hasn’t already. You just can’t talk about anything sex related with her ever again apparently.”

She giggled slightly at that and let the feeling of relief wash over her just a little. She wouldn’t know for certain, not until she spoke to her herself. But for as hurt and annoyed as he sounded over their conversation? He seemed completely confident that she’d come around too. “Did you say waffles?” She hummed in affirmation and laughed at his wide, excited grin. “Want to have sex real quick and then go get some?”  
“Should I be offended that you want to rush what is likely to be our last chance to be together for some time, for waffles?” His sly grin was all the warning she got before he was tickling her and wrestling her underneath him, until she was shrieking with laughter and begging peace and wrapping around him in a bid to hide herself from his hands under his own body. “Not just waffles Red! Homemade waffles! I know your mother well enough to understand that pre-made foods are a mortal sin! But I’m willing to concede that I’d be just as happy with eating you instead!” She hummed suspiciously and narrowed her eyes at his cocky look. Letting out a dramatic sigh of faux exasperation out and waving her hand pointedly. “Fine! If I must allow it in place of homemade waffles, so we can actually make love on this - our last morning together - FOR THE TIME BEING! - Then it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make!” His loud bark of laughter spoke to his obvious disbelief of her mummery, but he did no more than lean down for a passionate kiss, slipping his wonderful tongue into her mouth and sucking at her lips in what was very clearly meant as a dress rehearsal for his breakfast show. And she was very happy to let him have that too.

———————

Her sisters promise of a less awkward atmosphere at breakfast, was a vicious lie! It was awkward! But she did have to grant that Arya probably didn’t anticipate that everyone would be happily ensconced around the dining area of the rear deck still, when she and Jaime made their way downstairs. Nor that they would do so having obviously come from the same shower, their still wet hair giving them away. She, herself hadn’t even thought on the fact that most of them had actually been packed and ready to head out the day before, so the same frantic chaos wouldn’t be occurring again this morning. May The Gods bless her wonderful mother though! For stepping up and easing the ‘mostly’ amused tension and waving them into seats whilst she raced off to get the plates she had set in the oven for them both. 

It was still strange, despite her siblings being on their best behaviour and NOT looking for every possible excuse to tease them, but rather keeping conversation flowing away from the fact that they had appeared together as a couple after sleeping the night and morning away with each other. It did NOT go unnoticed that whilst Tom looked like he wanted to laugh, despite what had to have been an awful farewell for him only a few hours ago? Myrcella was almost completely silent, and struggled to meet either of their eyes. She couldn’t blame her really. Never mind the couldn’t and shouldn’t and awful family secrets? She was openly in a relationship with her friends ‘not’ FATHER. Marg had said it far better than she would ever even know! She was a walking cliche. It was just lucky that she was also a happy walking cliche that would hopefully, one day, be an even happier one.

The farewells were even worse! Stannis and Shireen hadn’t been a problem at all, she hadn’t expected they would be! Though the softly whispered ‘I hope you are alright and I’m happy to see you so happy.’ Certainly eased some of the discomfort that she hadn’t realised she was carrying around still. But Loras and Renly were incorrigible! Utterly despicable the pair of them! Taking advantage of her mother wrapping both younger Baratheons in her arms and extracting promises to call should they need anything at all, no matter the time or task! To flamboyantly farewell her with crushing bear hugs and smacking kisses to her good cheek and ask completely inappropriate questions! The dirtbags! But Tom and Cell were... In a word? Uncomfortable. Both of them apologising for their mother - no matter how she told them it was unnecessary they do so! And Tom ‘welcoming her to the family and cheekily calling her Aunty Sansa.’ - Which she admittedly thought sweet and WAY TO GOOD to hear JUST yet! But then she had walked with Myrcella to the car slowly, in awkward silence, which was only broken by her friend clearing her throat softly and begging time to process after she apologised and offered to explain her actions in time. It was better than she had any right to hope for though. So she had just smiled sadly and nodded and hugged her perhaps a touch tighter and for a touch longer than she normally might have. And then did NOT lean into Jaimes side as they waved them off.

And then it was her turn. As she was the only one left, heading in a completely different direction on her own, she wouldn’t be travelling in any sort of convoy. Jaime and Tyrion would be followed or vice versa, by Jon and Ygritte, whilst everyone else would be making for Winterfell. And despite the fact that she technically had the shortest distance to her destination, she had to pick Lady up from The Royce’s and unpack and settle in, hopefully before Margaery descended. She didn’t want to go. In a hilarious twist, the weekend she had dreaded and tried desperately to avoid, had actually ended up resulting in the exact confrontation she had feared. She had created the dramas she had been trying to avoid. And she was coming away conflicted with some aspects, with awkward changes to some relationships, and her future happiness too. It was both the absolute worst weekend of her life - and the best. 

It was always hard to part with her family, even when she knew she would see hopefully a good majority of them in a few short weeks. But parting with Jaime seemed like the worst kinds of torture imaginable.

She hugged all of her family - and Tyrion too, weathering the sly jokes they had held back on all morning out of respect for Myrcella and Tommens discomfort, and agreed easily, to take care and keep them posted on the progress of her face healing and the typical ‘let us know when you are home safe’ spiels too. But then her car was waiting and her family happily stepped back onto the front porch, leaving Jaime to help her with her bag. Never mind that she was more than capable of doing it herself! But she didn’t complain when he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into his side with a hard kiss to her temple whilst he lugged her suitcase in his good hand. She might have stayed quiet to stop herself from crying. But she didn’t complain at all. It was vastly different in tone, than it had been only days past, walking down the gravelled drive with this same companion. She had been pleasantly surprised and mildly suspicious and most definitely confused by his sudden friendliness then. If only she had known WHY he was acting so out of what she had come to understand was character for him.

She lost the fight against her tears when he pulled her into his chest and wrapped his arms around her shoulders and laid a smacking kiss to her jaw. She didn’t hesitate to slide her hands around his sides and cling to his back as hard as she could, and lean her face against his, so she might memorise his firm lines against her soft curves. “How many of my shirts am I going to find missing when I unpack hmm?” She let out a wet laugh and shrugged carelessly. She SHOULD be embarrassed by such behaviour! But she didn’t care at all because she knew he wouldn’t really care, even if he couldn’t afford to replace them easily. “How many pairs of my panties are gone from mine? And just where did my other blanket get to I wonder?”  
“My blanket. And... In my defence? What panties made their way into my suitcase were NOT functional as underwear! But absolutely spectacular at frying whatever it is that gives me the ability to speak. So I was doing us both a solid service by stealing them!” She pursed her lips in a rather ridiculous attempt at not laughing at him and closed her eyes to breathe him in for just a few moments more, sighing softly as his lips found her jaw, just before her ear. “I don’t want to let go, but we do have a rather uncomfortable audience that I am going to have to weather teasing from the moment you drive out of here Baby. So I really should.” Her breath shuddered out of her, making her distress at the idea so very obvious. “I do have to get going and so do you soon too I guess.... I’ll let you know when I’m there?” She could feel his jaw clenching as he swallowed hard and nodded. “Please. I’ll likely still be driving myself, but that’s alright. Please drive carefully?”  
“You too? And let me know when you are home too?” He hummed in agreement and pulled back to lay needy kisses to her face and lips. “I’ll call tonight and we will talk... Whenever you want after that too alright?” She nodded and kissing him a little harder, not trusting herself to speak at all.

And then she was in her car and pulling away, waving with a sad smile as he pushed his hands into his trouser pockets and watched as she did. She let the tears fall but stifled the sobs. Refusing to give in and ugly cry until she turned onto The High Road towards The Vale and her ‘home’ in Eyrie City. Alone, and far from her family and the man she loved. Refusing to give in to the pain in her chest that she has damned well predicted and had tried hard to avoid happening! Only she could be so hopeless in love that she had to deal with so very many issues when she finally stumbled onto the real thing! 

And when her reliable little car started sputtering and then just STOPPED with three quarters of an hour to go in her trip? All she could do was laugh at her own luck! And the Gods thinking they were funny by screwing with her!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TAADAA! I hope I haven’t muffed it up too badly! Thanks for coming along for the ride and I promise, this is only the beginning! 
> 
> Also! High five! I actually finished it!
> 
> I’m not crying and singing James Blunt songs in my head! You’re crying and singing James Blunt songs in your head!


End file.
